DBZ x Reader Oneshots

Brownie Thief {Beerus x Stoner!Reader}

"Tch whatever be back soon."

"Okay just don't miss me too much." I chuckled.

Beerus scoffed as I began leaving, a blush brushed onto his cheeks. "Yeah right...I won't."

-

I huffed a breath of air as I lugged the bags at my sides. The grocery store was pretty chaotic today, no surprise there but because of that it took me even longer to return home. Hopefully by some miracle Beerus has not eaten the brownies.

I then thought to myself, I mean he is a being well over 1000 of years old and with a extremely large appetite...maybe the brownies won't affect him one bit! With a clear and hopeful conscious I open the door and I was met with what I feared.

The cupboards had been scavenged and food littered the floor along with traces of ripped fabric. Fabric from my brand new couch that I oh so worked hard for. I took a deep breath and gently placed the items onto the counter. I gave a look of horror once I saw the pan.

Only a third of brownies was left over. That definitely have to had some sort of effect.

I sighed it wasn't entirely his fault after all I did know he wouldn't listen to me. Now I just have to find him and once again hope he isn't having a bad trip. Luckily it wasn't hard to find him as he left a trail of snacks behind. It was going to take a while to clean this all up.

Following the trail to my room I quickly found the purple feline eye balling a colorful lava lamp. I snickered to myself he looked so adorable. An idea popped in my head, I've always wanted to try this. Holding in my laughter I try to grab the swaying cats attention, "Pspsps."

Those simple sounds caught on as he turned to me with curiosity. Beerus tilted his head for a second and then looked back at the lava lamp. "Welcome back...you should really look at this. It's so mesmerizing."

"I can see that sooo how are you feeling?"

"I feel fuzzy and everything is moving around me...what was in that brownie?"

"Cannabis." I simply say and he just looks up at me with such confusion. "In short it's a drug that effects the mind. It what's making you feel all floaty and probably hungry. Also I'm making the pudding you cool staying in here or do you want to come with me?" I wasn't sure if I trusted him alone but he seemed pretty intrigued by the lamp.

Beerus looked up at me and swiftly stood up, "Pudding sounds amazing! Lets make it together."

-

The whole time I was in the kitchen Beerus mainly watched and listened to me as I prepared the food. After getting it ready we of course dug in not without The God of Destruction constantly complimenting me. I swear he really has to watch what he says or my heart will explode!

Anyhow, after the dessert I too helped myself to my earlier creation. Now while I waited for the brownie to take effect Beerus and I sat on the couch to watch some goofy shows. In all honesty high Beerus was very calm and relaxed. I was expecting a tornado to happen in my house but I got a very sleepy and hungry kitty.

After a while the brownie started to take its toll and I had this sudden urge to pet Beerus. With no conscious to tell me 'no it might be a bad idea' I had already placed a hand on top of his head and began stroking it.

Beerus had no negative reaction. In fact he leaned closer to me and lightly purred. My heart sank at his cuteness and I was overcome with happiness. I wrapped my arms around his sides giving him a hug, Beerus still purring.

I squealed and giggled, "Ah! You are just too cute!" I gushed.

Beerus blushed brightly as he turned his head, trying his best to hide his be at red face. "S-shut up! I'm a God of Destruction, I am Fearsome....n-not cute."

"Sure whatever you say my cute fearsome kitty." I giggled again.

"So...annoying." Beerus muttered, still trying to hide his expression.

I really do need to see more of his shy side! It's different from his everyday mood. Of course not that I didn't like that side just that this was new and I felt somewhat closer to him as I get to see this rare occurrence.

Laying my head onto his shoulder I snuggled up to him, "Let's watch the show now."

Beerus felt his heart race but embraced the feeling and laid his head on mine. With no words exchanged we already understood each others feelings, thoughts and actions. Beerus wrapped a protective arm around me and slowly we dozed off.

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Been a while since I published anything and wow this is long xD I couldn't sleep until this was finished.