The World That Was Mine (Part I & II)

Part II: I

I was still taking slow bites of the toast when I saw Tyler's head perk up, at something in the doorway. I didn't have to turn around to know it was my siblings coming home from school. Emma sat down at the counter beside me, a grin and some unexplained glitter covering her face.

"Winter break is here!" She signed quickly. Emma was definitely the best at sign. She, Logan, Nolan, and Jace all devoted their time while I was in the hospital to learning as much as they could for me. Emma was almost fluent, just like I was. She'd been amazing the last few months. Supportive, kind, and sometimes the only person keeping me sane around here. She didn't treat me like glass, like the rest of our family. She and I had become very close the last few months. Like sisters. Of all of my family, Emma and Logan treated me the most like one of them. Like I've always been here. Like I was more than just a thorn in our family's side. I smiled at her, quietly thankful for the attention my siblings' arrival took away from the toast I had no intention of finishing.

"And that means we leave for Vermont in two days." Finley signed sloppily. He and Tyler were alike in that way. Terrible at sign, but trying their best.

"Yes, which means you should all get packing." Tyler said with a stern glance at the three of us. Apparently our family went skiing in Vermont every Christmas. I had never really seen snow before the start of this month. Frost, sure, but never snow like this. I felt like an alien seeing it for the first time. I had never been so cold in my life. Jace had teased that it was because I was dressed like I was still in Georgia, but in my defense, I had no idea how to prepare for the 20 degree weather they got in Maryland. And Emma told me Vermont was even colder, which made me a little nervous for our trip. I was not fond of the cold. Maybe it was the southerner in me, but I would always prefer Georgia's 65 degree winters.

"I already am, Tyler." Emma said with an eye roll. Tyler seemed unimpressed with her attitude, but didn't say anything about it.

"Do you both still want to go out tomorrow night for your birthday dinner?" He asked instead.

"I already made reservations at Birmans if you do?" Jace intervened, leaning on the counter beside Tyler. Mine and Emma's birthday was Christmas eve in three days. We were leaving in two days, so Tyler suggested we have a party for the both of us the Saturday before we left. Emma said we should have it at a restaurant because it was more grown up than a party, and I would admit I was rather relieved that she decided that. I of course had gone right along with whatever she suggested, but I felt a little better knowing I wouldn't have to be stuck in the middle of a party meant for me, that I didn't want. The idea of a party made me panic. Loud, chaotic, and very, very lonely. A restaurant I could deal with.

Emma nodded. "I already invited Jamie to come with us," Emma had stopped hanging out with Lainey and the others soon after I stopped coming to school. I guess she found other friends. I wasn't inviting anyone. I had no one I wanted to see in that sense. I hadn't spoken to any school friends since the last day I was there. The day I had my break down after talking to Brayden. Some may say the lack of human interaction seemed lonely, but I was used to it by now. I couldn't face my friends. Not like this. A battered version of the already broken person I was. It was better for me to hide. To pretend none of it was real, even after 2 months of reality setting in.

Jace had been the one most concerned about my lack of friends. He was always telling me that no one would look at me different, or judge me for my new set of challenges, but I didn't believe him. Everyone judges everyone, whether you know you're doing it or not.

"What about you Izzy? Anyone you want to invite? Maybe Lainey, or someone else you used to hang out with?" Jace pressed with worried eyes.

I shrugged and shook my head. "No. I'm okay."