Desiderium

24| My Secret

After I cleaned my knuckles from the blood that was covering them, I put on black leggings and a white T-shirt. I took deep breaths as I walked back to the living room where everyone was waiting for me.

"His name was Noah," I started as I took a seat on the sofa where no one was sitting."He was Adrian's younger brother. We might not have been related by blood but considered him and Adrian my brothers. He was my person. I would die in a heartbeat for him. He was one of the few people who could calm me down when I had one of my tantrums. He understood me, no matter how complicated I was.

Much to people's disbelief, there was never anything romantic between us. I could never describe how much I love him and when he died, I fell into a bad place. I was lost. I was used to depending on him. My happiness relied on his existence. After his death, I would lock myself in my room for days, I didn't eat or speak to anyone everyone. To let go, forget, and numb the pain, I started attending parties and drinking. My depression got worse when I start to use drugs. Thankfully before I got addicted Mama found out and stopped me. But the way she found out—God. I could never forgive myself for putting her through that. She found me unconscious in my room after I had overdosed due to a miscalculation I made when I took the drugs." A lone tear fell down my cheek.

I didn't dare to look up and see the pity and sympathy in their eyes. I didn't even tell them the full story yet. I wasn't sure if they could handle it.

"How did he die? if you don't mind me asking." Marco asked.

"Fuck. I am not sure if you guys are ready to hear this." I sigh.

"We assure you we can handle it, pumpkin." Just by hearing the nickname, I knew those were Lucas' words.

"We were walking at night when a bunch of guys jumped us they tried to um, r-rape me but Noah protected me but then they drugged us and kidnapped us they keep us for two weeks before our family found us. These two weeks were hell. They tortured us, starved us, and made us watch each other in pain. And that shit was the worst kind of torture. Hearing him scream in agony broke my heart. He always tried to protect me no matter what. When they started to beat me, he would provoke them so they would direct their anger toward him instead. Then our family came back to save us..."

F L A S H B A C K

"That's our only opportunity to get out of here." I whispered as we discreetly walked out of the cell we have been locked in for days.

"I promise I will get you out of this shit hole, Ella." He reassured me, his words immediately easing my worry and fear. "No matter what happens today, I want you to know that—"

That's when I noticed him. One of the guards had been taking pleasure in torturing us. He was standing a few feet away from us with a gun in his hand aiming in our direction. Before I could pull Noah back, the monster pulled the trigger. The gunshot rang in the empty halls.

His chest. It hits his chest. Blood was covering his dirty shirt as he placed his hand on the wound. I was frozen in place. My worst nightmare.

When I found the courage to look up again I saw my mother taking out her knife as she fight the monster before I looked into his eyes. There was no sign of fear.

Noah's body fell to the floor. I forced myself to get over my shock and kneeled next to his almost lifeless body.

"S-stay awake, Noah. Please d-don't leave me, please, Noah." I stuttered as begged him to fight "Everything will be alright. You will be alright. They are here. We will get you to the nearest hospital right away."