difficult // taegyu

fifteenth chapter

The asked male doesn't respond. He doesn't want to.

"Maybe it'll help you.", I try again.

Maybe it's because of my words, maybe it's because of his position between his two Hyungs or maybe it's because he feels, that his brother won't disturb us. Probably it's all of the reason mixed up. It doesn't matter anyway. He looks me in the eyes as he starts to explain that his parents decide Beomgyu should do something he doesn't want and he helped them.

He is a sobbing mess again. I don't think that he told us everything, but I'm sure he said everything that bothered him. Surprisingly, I'm not angry anymore. He feels guilty already.

I'm sure Beomgyu will forgive him. But I guess he needs time.

I pat Hyukas head and go back in my room to check on the person laying there in my bed. As I enter my room an see the broken boy, with dried tears on his cheeks, peacefully sleeping there, I made myself a promise. I don't let people hurt him that much again. I want to keep him safe.

With that thought constantly in my mind, I let myself down next to him again.

Unfortunately, my actions make Beomgyu wake up. I smile at him warmly.

"I- I'm sorry.", mumbles the latter and I immediately shake my head. "You don't have anything to apologize for."

He snuggles himself closer to me and I give him willingly more of my warmth. After a short time, he lets go of me and sits straight up.

"Wanna talk?", I offer as I sit up too, so I can look in his eyes.

He nods and starts: "My parents want me to be the next CEO of their company. They took my brother with them to let him sign some stupid papers to force me to do it." He is calm. Too calm. Doesn't bothered by the facts he's telling me. He already accepted it.

"I don't care about them. What made you upset?" I didn't want to bring these words out so harshly. Like an excuse I slip closer to him and grab his hand. Without thinking I intertwine our hands.

"Betrayal. I feel like my brother betrayed me. He is my brother I was there for him, when my parents weren't, when Jin left. I was always there for him. I smiled for him in the darkest times. Shouldn't he be on my side? Shouldn't he tell me instead of just signing these documents? But actually, it doesn't even matters, because I know I'll forgive him. I love him so much. But it hurts, it hurts so much. And I feel bad. So unbelievable bad for not running towards I'm right now and telling him that he's forgiven. I can't. And I hate myself for that, I am stubborn I know. But I can't lie to him. I haven't forgive him till now. And I'm sorry because he is so sad and anxious right now. I know him. He blames himself, even though our parents are the bad ones now. But I can't force myself to comfort him and tell him it's alright. Because it's not. And I'll never forget it. I'll forgive him, but I'll never forget. And I feel so so so bad. I'm such a bad person-" He stops his rambling. Only a single tear is running down his cheek.

"You're a great person. You feel betrayed, he broke your trust. You need time to forgive him. But it's alright, because he needs time too, to figure things out. And when you two are ready, everything will be alright again. The fact that you worry about him, even though he did that, shows, who you are. A real kind, selfless and caring person. Don't feel bad. It's alright.", I answer him even though, no one asked. I feel like he need some words of courage. He needs to know that he has the right to be angry sometimes.

"You sure?" He looks at me with his watery eyes, full of questions. I lean closer. "Yes" He comes closer too. Our eyes are locked in each other's. We are only inches apart.

And then- He hugs me. I hug him back tight, and he does the same. I pull him closer, so close, that he has to sit on my lap. But it doesn't matter, we don't even notice our position.

As time passed by, I want to let go and go to the others, but he won't let go. I tried to stand up with his arms around my neck and his legs around my hips. As expected, he is light, so I am able to stand up, with this boy clinging on me. Not gonna lie, I find it incredible cute.

"You won't let go, right?" "Yes!" I chuckle and mumble: "Cute panda"

I know the clinging pet is rather a koala, but he is a panda. Don't question me. He's my cute panda.

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cuteeeee sbsjbsjsjsb

Anyways, please don't mind any mistakes, cause my brain doesn't function right now :)

And please take my message serious. Sometimes you have the right to be angry and even be selfish. I know for some people (me too) it's hard to be like this, but if you don't do this you will brake. Please take care of yourself and learn to be selfish in a healthy way of course!

Hope you like this chapter, let me know!

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Have a great day or night! See ya in two days <3