Entanglement With Fate (Part 2)

19. A New Start

The regret only pooled further painfully.

Maa came up. When she saw me injured she almost wanted to get to me but Anna stopped her.

"Skanda..." Maa tried to say something but he nodded a no.

"The person she should go to is pitashree. She had herself said she didn't want to associate herself with pitashree. He is the head of the family. Unless he decides otherwise, we cannot try to associate with her." Anna told her and turned to Ganesha bhaiya, "Anna, I hope you understand too."

I nodded. It pained but I didn't counter it. He was right. After all, I had been the one to start all of this.

When I finally reached the peak, I saw Nandi sitting before baba. I walked over to Nandi and tried to touch his feet but he moved away.

"You have hurt my lord. I cannot let you touch my feet." He told me.

That pieced me further than anything. It set me in tears. I went up to baba and touched his feet. The ashes that were smeared on his feet, I put on my forehead. The tears fell down. It seemed like the entire Kailasha was moving. My lungs tried to expand themselves for more oxygen, things started getting blurred.

Holding on to baba's feet I gave up.

I woke up and looked up to find him gone from the spot. It was empty. Neither baba was there nor Nandi.

"He left. He didn't want to talk to you anymore." One of the ganas told me.

I tried to look for baba. I found him walking down and ran behind him. "Baba..." I called him out. I started crying. "Baba, I'm really sorry."

"Sonakshi, just go away, will you? You are disturbing my meditation. You don't want me to associate with you. And I am not. So, you should go back home." He walked away.

"Baba!!!!" I shouted.

When I woke up, I found myself on a bed. "Baba..." I shouted breaking into tears.

"It is alright, Sonakshi. It is okay. Just a dream." Baba held me. I looked up and saw him sitting right next to me. He chuckled. "Silly, you passed out." He hugged me tightly and rubbed my shoulder to comfort me.

He shook his head at my stupidity and gave me a glass of water. The glass shook in my hand so he held them. "Drink some water, you're terribly dehydrated. I'm surprised you haven't become ice." He scolded me and made me drink water. He wiped away my tears. "Please don't cry, I just gave you some water, don't make them flow out as tears."

"I... I'm sorry. I..." The words got stuck in my throat. Baba simply kissed my forehead.

"You're my own child, Sonakshi. Anyway, I have drawn this much that when it comes to Alaknanda you act rashly." He said chuckling.

"Aren't you angry at me?"

"Well, you are my child after all. You're bound to act like me when you lose a loved one." Baba smiled at me.

I wrapped my arms around him and started crying like a baby. He simply caressed my hair.

"I don't want to lose you too, baba. I already lost Adi. I cannot bear if I lose you." I pulled away, "I know what I said was extremely rude but if I lose another person, I might as well die. I... I didn't know who to blame. When blaming myself wasn't enough, I looked for reasons to blame others. I blamed Mama, then you..."

"Till today, I have never walked away from anyone. People walk away from me at times due to losing their path. I don't lose my way to them. I still wait for them to come back. That is the nature of love. You never give up on them. I never gave up on you either. You needed your space and I can understand."