DOUBLE TROUBLE || KTH

39 : A CHANCE

" I won't, Anna. I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have dragged you-"

" Don't repeat one thing again and again Tan, that it'll lose its meaning. I don't know if you are sorry or pretending to be. Still, I'm ready to forgive you just please don't come in front of me again. Free me as you did once again. This time, for forever. I'll free you from your guilt in return". The last few words came out too weak.

" Please understand Anna. I tried everything to stay away from you but my mind is kept on thinking about you only. I drained myself into alcohol. I caged myself in my room for about a month because I don't want to hurt you again but still, here I am. One thing I understand is that no matter how much I try, you'll always be in my mind in the end because it's you I have ever loved ". He confessed so politely.

" To be honest Tan, I love you too but it's hopeless now. I would have run to you with open arms, this is how I was crazy for you but when I saw your world closely, all I was able to find there is darkness. Everything feels lifeless there. It's hard to breathe in there. We belong from two different worlds Tan, two opposite worlds".

I know he must be thinking I've become heartless. That I've become cold. But I'm just protecting my innocence. I'm just protecting my soul.

" What if I say I want to leave that filthy world, leave everything behind, and wants to come into your world. Will you forward your hand to pull me out of it. Will you guide me?". He asked in the lowest tone. His eyes pleaded. I can sense how helplessly he asked for my help but no.

" I can't". I breathed out. " My own hands are shaking. I've lost myself too. I'm still in search of myself. I still don't know my own identity. You just messed up everything".

I released myself from his grip and took some steps backward.

" I was too young to attend my parent's funeral, Tan. I was too young to face this world without any support. I was a child that was forced to grow up. I always thought it was an accident but no. It was your father. He destroyed my family. Whenever I thought about reaching out to you in these past days, their pale faces never failed to stop my feet. I know it wasn't your fault but the battle between my mind and heart is not letting me forget those bad days when I used to cry hugging my knees in a corner of that orphan house. I can't help you Tan because I'm still that little kid who is too weak to even stand for her parents' justice". My head bowed and uncontrollable tears made their way out.

"I killed him". He spoke after a brief of a moment.

My head snapped up only to see his blank eyes looking down at me. My lips parted. " You killed your f-father?". I gulped asking.

He shook his head in no. " I killed the murderer of your parents. I killed the person I promised myself to kill when I was just a child. He was my destroyer. The only relationship I had with him is that I have his blood in my veins".

My eyes softened as he kneel in front of me making me take a step backward. He grabbed both of my palms in his gently and lifted his head.

" I'm here after winning all the battles. But I'm on my knees for you. I'm ready to beg for a chance. I know my soul is too dark for you but I'm ready to change. Tell me what would I have to do. I'll become what you want me to be. Shall I become like Won?". He asked tilting his head a little. " Would you give me a little space in your world then? Will you give me a little space in your heart then? Will you...will you love me back Anna? just this once?"

Tears formed in his eyes making his dark brown orbs shine. " Please love me once again". He said above a whisper. His head bowed in the end and his shoulders started shaking. His grip loosened on my hands. Soon a crack sob left his mouth as he burst into tears.

He didn't look like the Tan I know, the mafia boss world knows. He looked so vulnerable, so broken.

I held my tears back and sat on my knees. Tilting my head I brushed his bangs from his face. He lifted his head a little. I cupped his face and wiped off his fresh tears with my thumb.

" You know, Tan? I fall for you by looking at your blank face, I got lost in these stone-cold eyes when I glanced at you for the very first time. You don't need to be like someone else. I love the way you are. And yes". I nodded with a small smile before continuing. " I'm ready to give you a chance".

As soon as I said those words he pulled me into a bone-crushing hug. I also hugged him back. I felt his thumping heartbeat near my chest.

" Thank you so much, Anna". His words vibrated near my neck.

A cold wind hit on my face along with flower petals. " You arranged all these for me?" I asked looking at the decoration behind him that I completely forgot after I saw him.

He shook his head and pulled out of the hug his hand still lingered on my skin. I frowned.

" You arranged everything for us". He replied making me grin in happiness. He cupped my face with his one big palm and lean in.

I closed my eyes when his lips landed on mine. He moved them against mine softly yet passionately. I responded to his kiss hearing him mumble against my lips. " Happy birthday, Anna".