We Fall Like Ashes | Wildfire Series

Twenty-Two: Let's Stop Pretending

Sore spot, Bren. That was really a fucking sore spot, and you just went for it, didn't you?

"Yes," I muttered, done trying to pretend otherwise. 

"And then what happened?"

After zipping up my suitcase, I leaned back on the floor, using one hand to drag down my face in frustration. Maybe it would be good to get this off my chest, but it also hurt after the last two days. Everything, all the wounds, felt fresher this morning than they had in a long time.

"She told me that she wasn't looking for anything more than a one-night stand. We didn't talk again until she moved in."

"And have you guys hooked up since the gala?"

You're killing me, Bren.

I just blinked at him.

"I'm going to take that as a yes." Bren cleared his throat. "And Collins still says she doesn't want anything more?"

"She hasn't said it, but that's how she acts. She's trying to keep some distance between us." A short pause. "You know that night when she was drunk, and I picked her up from Grayson's?"

Bren nodded.

"That night, she told me she didn't want to walk away after the gala, but she was afraid of getting close to people because she doesn't want to drag them down into some fucked up situation she won't tell me about."

"Oh." Bren's face said it all. Dots were connecting in his brain faster than the flash of a camera. The picture was clear in his head, but I was still left in the dark.

I stilled. "You know, don't you?"

Suddenly, Bren wouldn't meet my gaze, and that really fucking pissed me off.

"You know what the fuck she's talking about," I repeated, pushing to my feet.

Bren didn't reply, but he did swear beneath his breath and stare out the window. Dude was super chatty a minute ago, and now he wanted to go silent, huh? Well, that didn't work for me.

"Bren, give it up."

Closing his eyes, Bren tipped his head back against the wall behind my bed, and then he raked a hand through his unruly brown hair. I really hated his reaction. Not just because he wasn't saying anything, but also because it told me that whatever was going on with Collins...it wasn't a little deal. Bren wouldn't be acting like this if it was a little deal.

But that made me want to know even more.

"I don't know, man," he finally breathed after looking at me. "I don't know if it's my place to tell you."

I walked to the bed, leaning against the end of the mattress as I pinned my best friend with a glare.

"But you know," I emphasized. I needed to hear him say it.

"Yeah, Beau." He said the words softly, like he knew they would kill me a little bit. "I know."

****

"I don't like this."

Everyone else was already in the car, ready to head back to Oakland. From there, they would all go their separate ways for winter break. Except for Collins. I had a feeling that she didn't have plans to go anywhere.

Pausing in the front doorway, Collins looked back at me. She was dressed comfortably today, wearing matching sweatpants and a sweatshirt with a jacket thrown over, probably because of the long car ride ahead of her. "What?"

"What are your plans for Christmas?"

"I—" She paused. Thoughts ran through her head, clear as day, and all of them were focused on trying to find some way around my question.