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Moments of Regrets

When he see the shock and hurt on their face - he honestly doesn't care and truthfully he is beyond annoyed on why the hell they we're here - they will just step on his way.

He don't need them. They were just a distraction on his way of power and success.

And he regret thinking that way

If those days he felt annoyed on his friends. Now he felt horrible sick just looking at them cause he has no face to show them for all the things he did

(So awful. So disgraceful)

Then he bite his bottom lip to ignored the aching of his heart

He just watch uninterested his friends battling the shadow bladers being played their feelings to think that if they win, they will have him back knowing they win or lose - nothing will change because he is really dead set on throwing away his old self into a worse version of him and in the end of the day they kick off in the Snake Pit- but he doesn't even care a single bit

Wakiya eventually once told him that when they get kicked out, they thought that he himself was kick out too thinking he is not in that horrible place anymore and just hiding somewhere like training

And in that moment he felt a dread pool of sick feeling on his stomach

He make his friends get a high hopes thinking he's ok when in reality it's not and his heart clench in hard guilt

Looking back in those days, he could've done differently-no he should done something like going off with them in the first place

But no. He didn't do a damn simple thing and decided to stay in that hellish place where young bladers are being push into there limits when it's clear that they are hurting too

(Just like him)

He grip his shirt tightly just thinking why he didn't feel any remorse that time?

That curse place of Snake Pit will surely hunt him down forever and now he's questioning his self now on why he doesn't have the heart to care and concern about other people

Is he really become that heartless? And the answer is so damn obvious

"Shu isn't weak! You know nothing about him. He work harder than anyone. He does a lot of training, battled even he was hurt...He made really powerful techniques special techniques. This whole time, he worked incredibly hard! That's why he's one of the Spin Emperors. That's why he's strong!"

Valt declare that on other people with full of sincerity and fondness cause he mean every single word from the bottom of his heart.

But instead of being grateful. He despite it. And now it's too late to appreciate his words anymore
When all things are now revealed after his lose to Lui-again-and mock him again saying he knew it was him all this time. Then the world how now turn upside down

He was supposed to walk away from the shame he got in

But Valt run over him and desperately holding his shoulder to stop with his terribly shaking hands something that never happened before with his tears start to trickle down on his supposed to be innocent but now shocked hurt hazel brown eyes.

Then he plead- no begging to explain why he is doing this with his broken voice that was uncharacteristic to his blue friend

And his answer with his desperate pleading?

"You get out my way"

(Wow. Nice reply)

Shu harshly said without showing care or even slightly concern with those broken brown eyes now looking so helpless and hurt as if his world has forsaken him which might be a exaggeration but knowing Valt for almost a years he know that his friend is very sensitive and a crybab- has no control on his emotion.