Please Be There If I Remember

Chapter Thirty-Three: Valentine's Day

Blaise seemed to suddenly notice Draco's quick breathing, for the words he was about to say which would have probably been along the lines of, "As if he doesn't know already," were cut off and he stopped before walking towards Draco.

"Draco?"

"It's just—he can't know, Blaise! No one can! I know he, like, hates me, or whatever, but I don't, and I don't want the strange friendship thing we have going on to be ruined, and—and he's actually really nice to me even though I was a right jerk—"

"Draco!"

He shut his mouth with an audible click.

"Nothings going to be ruined, alright? Honestly, just take a deep breath and calm down a little. You want to know how I knew you were pining after Harry Potter like a schoolgirl?"

Draco shook his head. "Because it was obvious?" He said meekly.

"No. Because Harry's been pining after you ever since he first met you, and now you've finally started to notice."

"But—"

"No buts. Just because you don't remember, doesn't mean that I don't. And trust me when I say that boy has had it for you since you first looked at him with those shiny grey eyes of yours and he denied your handshake."

"Um, what?"

"Just—" Blaise said, sounding frustrated like he wanted to just get Draco to understand. "Just trust me, alright? It's true and you'd be even more of a blundering idiot than you already are not to notice," he huffed.

Draco snorted slightly into the small awkward silence.

"Alright, Blaise," Draco said softly, even though his heart felt sore. "I believe you."

Blaise looked at him as though he knew Draco wasn't being all that truthful, but he nodded just the same, and the two eventually left for the Great Hall.

~*"*~

The Valentine's spirit hung in the air and around Draco, pink birds charmed to fly to their recipients and glances traded between classmates that anyone would have to be blind not to notice.

Draco wanted to smash his head into a table.

He still hadn't strung up the nerve to ask Harry, no matter how much he screamed at his brain to Merlin just say something already. There was a tugging in his body that made his legs want to stand up, strut over to Harry and just spout it out. But whenever he tried, his feet would stick themselves to where they were resting and his mouth wouldn't open, the words clogged in his vocal cords and unable to pour out. Harry had made no move either, despite what Blaise had said, and Draco had spent the past few days in misery.

Blaise wasn't much help either anymore—not that he wasn't not supportive, but it mostly just consisted of teasing Draco and just plain making fun of him for not being Gryffindor enough.

"But I don't want to be like a Gryffindor," Draco had spouted back.

"At least you could have the nerve to actually talk to him instead of avoiding him and staring at him all day."

Draco had glowered at Blaise and that was the end of the conversation.

Valentine's Day also happened to land right on the Hogsmeade weekend, and couples continued to chatter about going to the different shops and the gifts the other person had bought them.

Draco once again had to refrain from turning his wand onto himself and casting a hard stupefy.

He decided to still go to Hogsmeade, maybe—and he would deny this—under some pretence that maybe Harry would change his mind and it would be best if he were prepared.

Draco had finally come to terms that he really was too chicken to ask Harry to go out to Hogsmeade with him, let alone for him to be his Valentine of all things, but he still had that small, lingering little feeling in his heart that maybe, just maybe, Harry would take up all the extra Gryffindor courage in him and put it to good use.

Of course, that was assuming the boy even liked him at all, which Draco was still on the fence about and something he only thought in passing before letting it go as if the thought was too preposterous to even be taken seriously.

He sighed and tugged on his coat over his school robes that were trailing on the lightly dusted ground, littered with a thin layer of powdered snow. His hair had grown longer over the past few months and Draco had decided not to cut it for he liked the feel of his hair falling in front of his eyes, no matter how unprofessional it really was.

Also, Harry had commented in passing about how it was starting to grow longer. Draco hadn't cut it since.

He tugged a loose strand behind his ear that was now all the way down to his neck, similar to Snape's yet a lot less greasy and shorter in the front, going longer in the back, and pulled his cloak further around his torso.

Blaise came up behind him, muttering something about stupid couples and their non-privacy wards, while also shifting up snow in his wake at his walking speed.

Theo and Pansy were gazing at each other way too lovingly to be properly accepted for two cold-hearted Slytherins, but at this point, most people had already left for the village, and the spot in front of the castle was pretty much empty except for a few stragglers, so very few people were there to notice.

Draco snapped his fingers in front of their faces to get their attention.

"Okay, so I know that Pansy and Theo are probably going to be snogging by the time we even start walking—" the two glared at him and Draco fought the urge to either sneer or stick his tongue out at them— "and Blaise will probably leave Merlin knows where because he's like that." The boy in question stood there with his hands in his pockets but it almost looked as if he wanted to stick a thumbs up at him like a petulant child. "And I want to hear nothing about Valentine's Day for at least one singular bloody moment, alright?"

Theo stepped forward, patted his shoulders almost contemptuously, and said, "It's alright Draco. We all know you don't have a date. We will do our best not to disturb your...prowling."

"I am not— You know what? Have fun on your date, Theo. I hope Pansy enjoys the taste of fish from your unwashed mouth."

The boy laughed like Draco was joking and stuck his hands in his coat pocket, his posture still straight and astride like a metal bar had replaced his spinal cord despite the laidback action.

Draco kind of wanted to shove snow into his mouth until he choked, but he realised he didn't actually harbour that much hate or animosity at all for Theo or even Pansy at the moment—Blaise had been right that he was just bitter about not having a Valentine's Date.

He sighed and the four left for Hogsmeade together, Pansy and Theo—just like Draco had predicted—leaving off on their own after only a few minutes of walking with them so they could be alone doing whatever the hell they wanted to; Draco decided that he really didn't care enough to see where they went.

Huffing, he pulled his chin down into his coat and stalked farther into the village with Blaise who looked like he wanted to be anywhere else but there.