The World That Was Mine (Part I & II)

Part II: XII

I shook my head. "I'm done."

-The World That Was Mine-

It only took Tyler half an hour to find a flight home. He hadn't asked me or Logan if there was anything we'd like to stay for, but we hadn't argued when he told us to pack our bags and be ready for eight. We were all ready to leave here. Ready to go back to somewhere that didn't feel like a dark, sinking hellhole full of pain and bad memories. I wasn't sure Harlan would be much better, but I knew I couldn't stay here for more reasons than I cared to admit. No one had said anything to each other after we'd cut off our unfinished conversation a few hours ago. None of us had anything to say. Logan had become like a ghost of himself over the last few hours. Hollow, and cold, looking half dead and empty as he moved through the world. I had tried to give him as much space as possible for most of the afternoon. It seemed like he needed it, and if I was honest, so did I.

Tyler seemed only marginally more alive than our brother did. He'd tried to get me to talk, like he always did, and helped me pack my bags after his announcement, but other than that, he'd also left me to my own devices for most of the day. It was unusual, to say the least. I wasn't used to so much alone time or lack of concern from my overprotective brothers. In the four months I'd lived with them, I couldn't come up with a single other time I'd felt quite so alone as I did here. But I tried my best not to let it bother me. They needed space. They deserved it. And I would not be the one to deny it to them. Which was how I'd ended up here. Sitting in the hotel room by myself in silence while I waited for one of my brothers to remember I was there. I was alone.

It was quiet still, and peaceful, but it didn't offer any of the usual relief. The quiet felt sour. Misplaced and uncomfortable as it sank into my skin like tiny, painful little needles. My hearing aids were still in my head. I was afraid the quiet would kill me if I dared to take them out. It was suffocating as it was. Tyler said they'd be right back. He hadn't said where they were going, or how long they'd be gone, but he had told me they would be back. Eventually. And I was trying my best to let eventually be as long as they needed. The pill was getting harder to swallow by the second. I'd tried to wrap my head around it all.

For the last hour that I'd been alone, I'd spent almost every second trying my best to try and comprehend what I had just learned, but no matter how I thought about it, none of it made any sense. Marley had lied. Or she may have lied. I clung to the possibility that she may not have done so intentionally. Even if there wasn't one to hold onto in the first place. The world had come crashing down when I lost her. I'd lost everything that day. My best friend, my family, my confidant. And now, it felt like I'd lost her all over again.

Because I had.

Best friends didn't lie. Family didn't keep things from each other. Confidants don't break your trust.

I had often wished I could speak to Marley in the last year I'd been without her, but never more than I did now, just so she could speak for herself. I kept telling myself that it didn' make sense, and that a piece of the puzzle was missing. But there wasn't. I had the pieces. Even if they didn't fit together to make a pretty picture. A shiver shot down my spine as a breeze from the bedroom window blew inside the room. I had opened it a little while ago, when I'd thought some fresh air would help me feel less nauseous.

It hadn't. All it did was just make me colder than I already was.

Sighing, I stood up from the bed slowly, and made my way over to the window. I grabbed the sill to pull it down, but paused when I saw two figures standing in the parking lot in front of the hotel. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out it was Tyler and Logan.

I could only see their backs, but even that told me whatever conversation they were having wasn't a pleasant one. I could practically see the tension between the two of them. Tyler was the one talking as far I could tell. He threw one hand up in the air in a frantic motion, running the other through his hair in an action of anxiety. Logan was shaking his head firmly in response to whatever Tyler was saying, which only seemed to make my oldest brother more enraged. Tyler's hands dropped. Logan's hands went up in the air as he evidently took his turn talking. I couldn't hear a word they were saying from where I was, but I had a feeling I wouldn't want to even if I could.