Map of the Lost

Trigger Warning: Mention of traumatic experience, violence, guns, knife and blood.

"Chef, for table number 8 po." My junior chef gave the note while I was supervising in the kitchen. Tumango ako at nagsimula na rin magluto. I kept myself busy in the restaurant the whole day until the closing time. I texted Cole, asking him what time his duty ends and he said he'd be late because he's also covering for a colleague.

I told him that I could wait in his office. After a few days of thinking, I decided that I should talk to him again. I wanted to be honest with him.

There was no issue when I went up to his office because it seemed like his secretary already knew about my arrival. I texted him to tell him that I was already there and that I would be waiting. Pero sa tagal kong naghintay, nakatulog ako.

I woke up by the soft and feathery strokes on my hair. It was Cole brushing my hair with his fingers in my sleep. "Hi," maikiling bati niya na may ngiti sa labi.

Inaantok pa ako pero umusog ako paatras para makahiga siya sa tabi ko. I patted the empty space beside me, signaling him to lie down which he did. Hinila ko naman ang isang braso niya para ipatong ang ulo ko na parang unan ko, at saka ko yinakap ang bewang niya. He hugged me back and now his fingers were drawing random shapes on my side. 

We stayed in that position, allowing the comfortable silence to surround us.

After taking our time indulging each other's warmth, bumangon na ako at hinarap siya. I tangled my legs together, sitting like a kid and took his hand in mine at hinayaan lang niya ako gawin ang kung ano doon.

After taking a deep breath, I spoke. "I want to be honest with you and tell you everything." Tumango siya at umayos ng upo. "You've already heard about Alli, diba? I've mentioned her before, she was my best friend."

"Yes, and Kei's sister diba?" I nodded. And from there, I started my story. The story I have long kept with me.

Alli was my best friend. 

At first I only befriended her because she was Kei's sister and I was always at their house. But then we got along really well. Our personalities clicked. She was very different from Kei. Although, she was also outspoken like her brother but she was more outgoing and expressive.

I was in 8th grade while she was in 7th. That one day after school when we decided to go to the mall. Half day talaga kami noon at kaya nagkaoras pa kami para magbihis and we wore the same color of top and pants but she also brought a white denim jacket with her. It's funny because we always end up coincidentally twinning on something or doing things the same way. Baka dahil palagi kaming magkasama.

Spontaneous gala lang 'to actually and buti pumayag sila mommy at tita na lumabas kami. Syempre, pinilit ko, e! 

We wanted to watch a movie and eat out. When we did our main agendas, we went shopping afterwards. Mostly sinamahan ko lang si Alli na bumili ng mga art materials niya.