After All This Time// Sebastian Sallow x Reader Hogwarts Legacy Fanfiction

Sebastian's POV//

Days passed since y/n received the letter, and I hated that there wasn't more I could do for her. She had been twisting herself up in knots about it, feeling guilty that her actions had affected those around her. Of course in some ways I still felt like this was my fault. 

If I hadn't tried to show her the cave in the first place, then this would've never happened. I know she always feels like she has to be the hero in every scenario, but rarely has anyone actually been there to look out for her, and the effects caused by this were severely evident. In some ways I completely understood this- not long ago, I was trying everything in my power to protect someone, and ended up hurting a lot of people in the process. Most days, I still felt guilty that I wasn't able to help here. Here and there, I'd been grabbing bits and pieces of information and remedies I thought might be useful, but not actually knowing where she was, there was really nothing I could do. 

In my sixth year, I was still frivolously wasting all of my time trying to find her, and find a solution. It took me that long to realize that she didn't want to be found by me. None of my letters were ever able to reach her, and there was nothing I could do. 

So seeing y/n now in this state, I felt that in some ways I understood. I always tried my best to support her, but I know better than anyone how hard headed she is when it comes to things like this. If she feels like there's more she can be doing, she wants to try her hardest to help. Like me, she needs to realize that sometimes, there's nothing you can do. You can care and throw everything you have at the issue as much as you want, but sometimes, it will never be enough. 

We were sitting up in the astronomy tower and as I let my mind race, I watched her nervous face as she bit at the tips of her fingernails. She had a million yard stare, and I could tell that there was too much on her mind. These days, there was little I could do to ease the tension. I'd occasionally try to bring up that I'd invited her to stay with me over the Christmas Holidays, but it would only pull her from her thoughts for a second before her head would start racing again. No matter how close I held her, it felt like she was the farthest away from me than she'd ever been. 

All I could do was try my best to be there for her. There wasn't much else I could do. 

"Sebastian," she started, her tone muted and laced with deep thought. "You don't suppose we could try to go after him again, this time with some sort of a plan?"

"No," I stated firmly. "You promised me you wouldn't do anything, and besides- we have no idea where he is."

"You know I hate this," she whispered. Her gaze was still staring somewhere off on the horizon as she spoke. 

"I know, but you need to know there's nothing we can do right now except be patient."

"When have you ever been patient?" she frowned, finally turning her eyes in my direction. "You've never been patient a day in your life, and suddenly you think you can tell me how to act in a situation like this?"

"I never said I was perfect," I defended. "I just don't want to see you get hurt."

"And I don't want to see any of the people I love get hurt. You should know better than anyone that I'm willing to go to the extreme to do such things. Anyways, in my experience, you're the exact same way. Like you were with Anne."

This statement ticked me off a little bit. "Anne has nothing to do with Charles. You know that."

"Doesn't matter. I'd think you of all people would understand why I need to do this." 

"You don't need to do anything!" I said, growing impatient. "If you even so much as attempt to play hero, I'll go straight to Professor Weasley. Please don't try anything." 

She exhaled sharply from her nose and turned her face away from me. "You don't get to tell me how to act." 

"No, but I need you to know how much I care for you, and that I don't want you to do anything risky for the sake of others. If not to protect yourself, think of how it would affect me if you were to get hurt, o- or worse." 

She didn't respond to me, but instead got up and started for the stairs. 

"Where are you going?" I called after her, getting up as well. 

"It's getting late," she stated, continuing on. "Going to my dorm. Please just leave me be for the time being. You're not thinking clearly right now."

"You're the one who isn't thinking clearly!" I said, chasing after her. She walked a few feet in front of me, and kept a quick and steady pace as we walked through the castle. I didn't want to let her out of my sight right now. She was definitely planning something, and there was no way I was letting her. 

I rolled my eyes as she descended the stairs into the Slytherin common room and bolted to her dorm. She slammed the door in my face just as I'd reached her. 

I plopped down on the floor in front of her door, determined to keep track of her. If she planned on going somewhere, I'd catch her.