Unkept Promises

The reason - Part II

"However, when I think of it now, I shouldn't have overlooked. Yes, she was difficult with them, and now I know that, she was in fact always envious of Abhiram - she herself confessed to that. But when it came to me, it was a different sort of animosity, as though she proclaimed me to be her enemy - finding ways to provoke me, she loved doing that. Yes, he did defend me, and eventually, I did find it convenient to overlook upon her ways, but I had always felt some sort of a scheming underneath her behaviour - I shouldn't have ignored that."

Avi took a deep breath.

"But honestly speaking, doctor, I never even had imagined that one day I would lose my Abhi to her malicious schemes. Had I ever had the slightest inkling of this, I would have never let her evil intentions go unchecked. She had always lain out traps for everyone around her. All of the times, we had evaded those traps, but this time, she succeeded, and at a colossal expense of our relationship.", Avi's voice was laced with pain.

She was so right, so f*cking right. Had I not been so easily manipulated by her, and not been so ignorant this time, just like I had been really sturdy against her plotting all of the other times, we would have never come to this.

"I", I cleared my throat, "I should never have overlooked upon her ways doctor. Had I handled her more sternly, simply just kept her away from us completely, this would have never happened, but I will not shift the blame on her. Had I been at least a bit rational while handling this situation, a bit sensitive - just a meagre of five percent of how I have always been with my Avi, I would not have fallen into her manipulative games."

"I understand what you want to say, but tell me one thing Abhiram, what changed at that point of time which made you react that way and utter some insensitive words to Avantika?", she addressed the elephant in the room, and I felt myself getting anxious at the prospect of what was to be the outcome of this talk.

"Insensitive words", a wry chuckle escaped my lips.

"That would be an understatement doctor. Cruel words, cruel gestures - I behaved in the manner no husband should behave with his wife, no man should behave with the woman he loves.", I stated.

"Coming to your question doctor, as I have always maintained, I am still unable to pinpoint what might have triggered such an improbable reaction from me, but after all these weeks of counselling and a deeper introspection, I can list out a few things - Kinjal's desperate cries for help, her grief of losing her child and that pain etched on her face, believing that Avi still continued her argument with Kinjal instead of overlooking upon that, that weird situation in itself - Kinjal losing her child and Avi still accusing her, a feeling that despite of being a parent why is Avi accusing a mother who has just lost her kid, and somewhere, also the fact that Kinjal can't kill her own child."

"And yet, Avi could do such a malicious thing of falsely accusing your sister, hai na (isn't it) Abhiram?", Avi's sharp comment felt like a much deserved slap.

How ironic was it that I wasn't able to believe that Kinjal would stoop to such a low level, and I believed that my Avi, my love would do that. Falsely accusing someone - that was not even a bit of what Avi was. I lowered my face, extremely ashamed of myself.

"Sorry, I did not mean to be bitter, but the thing is, those memories manage to bring out those parts of me which I myself despise - I am not this way, vindictive, cynical.", I could practically sense the regret in Avi's tone.

"But don't I deserve all your bitter words Avi?"

That was a rhetorical question, and Avi did not bother to answer. As much as she knew how much I deserved to be hurt now, she's too kind and has too large of a heart to even think of hurting me the way I did.