A Ghost Encounter: My Time with Simon "Ghost" Riley

Part Eighty-Four: Static

Overcome with relief and joy I begin tearing up. "That's...that's g-good to hear,"'I sniffle. "I was so worried."

"Hey, now." He scoots in a little closer. "It's alright. We're alright." He kisses my forehead.

I lean into his kiss without saying anything. I just want to take in all his warmth and affection.

"The rest of the team has been in and out of here. They're supposed to be coming back in a few hours but if you get discharged then there won't be any point. Give me a second to make a phone call." He presses one last kiss to my temple and then leaves the room.

I wonder if Simon's also been in and out of here. There's no way he's been here three days straight.

My mind continues to wander and I'm filled with a bit of anxiety. I wonder what it'll be like when I return to the base—and how it's been for everyone else—not just recovering from this mission but dealing with the loss of Soap.

We've put those feelings of grief and sadness on the back burner while we completed the mission but now that there's some static there's nowhere for those emotions to hide.

After fifteen minutes or so both Simon and the nurse re-enter the room, the doctor following behind them.

"Hello, Ms. Roberts. How are you feeling?" the doctor addresses me.

"Good," I say curtly, not intending to, but nonetheless.

"That's what I like to hear." He, the doctor, smiles wide. "You're healing up nicely and I don't have any major concerns. I'd say you're in the clear to go home."

I loosen a deep breath I'd been holding since the group walked into the room.

I get to go home.

"Can she leave now?" Simon asks the doctor in anticipation and after addressing some logistics the doctor gives me the clearance.

Simon helps me gather my things. The doctor made me an appointment for a check-up in about one month.

- TIME SKIP -

"Velcome pack! I vas zo voried." König embraces me in a too-tight hug when Ghost and I enter the common room, which warrants a wince from me.

"Watch it, König," Ghost hisses and I give him a warning glare.

König isn't intentionally trying to hurt me. He's just happy to see I'm alright and got a little too excited.

"Zorry. I'm chust happy vu are alright." König smiles at me.

I shake my head softly. "Don't apologize. I'm glad you're all alright, too."

Everyone takes their turn welcoming me back, one by one I receive words of encouragement and soft hugs from the rest of my team until it's Captain Price's turn.

"Sergeant Roberts." Price looks down at me stoically.

"Captain Price." I smile cautiously as I look up at him.

My Captain and I just stare silently at each other for a few moments and then I see glosiness in his eyes, tears welling.

"Price...I-" I'm cut off by him cupping the back of my head and planting a kiss on my temple.

"I'm glad you're home safe," he whispers, his voice wobbly.

"Me too," I sniffle a bit.

This last mission involving Makarov was probably the most difficult mission I've been on for a plethora of reasons. A lot of pain and loss came from this mission. But we did it. We completed the mission successfully.

I know, for me at least, there won't be any missions for a little while. Not only do I need to recover but Captain Price is a man of his word and I'm assuming my administrative leave—aka probation period—has already begun.

The only thing I'm worried about is Simon. My dear Simon. We had that talk the night before we took out Makarov about his plans for after the mission was over. He claims he doesn't need a break, and that he's fine regarding his grief, but I'm not so sure.

As the day went on we got a few things settled. As a team, we made plans for Soap's funeral. We plan to have it in two weeks from now. It wasn't an easy conversation but we pushed through.

Laswell and Price also had a long conversation with me about the terms of my administrative leave and why they decided to do so. It's not because they don't trust me. It's not because they don't think I'm good enough. But it is because I was insubordinate and actions have consequences.

They're teaching me an important lesson and I can respect that. Although we all agreed that my actions of insubordination were "risky" and "defiant", when Laswell left the office and Price asked me to stay back, he thanked me.

He thanked me. For caring for Soap so deeply. For my good intentions behind the insubordination. For holding Soap and making sure he wasn't alone in his final moments.

Our conversation was heartfelt and I'm feeling better about things. I'm feeling more secure in my relationships with my team. I'm feeling more confident.

I'd be lying if I said I haven't been insecure. I'd be lying if I said I haven't been irrational, reactive, and defiant.

I know these things about myself. But now, it feels like I'll be able to control myself better moving forward. And I think that starts with taking accountability.

So for now, I'll take my probation period for what it is. I'll recover, train hard, and do my best. I know I've proven to my team that I'm capable and that I'm someone they can trust.

Now it's my job to uphold those things.