Borrowed Time Part 2

Chapter 235

God, keep your head on straight.

"Am I wrong?" Shelby asked, and Juliette narrowed her eyes, looking at Shelby through the slats of her fingers as she shook her head. Obviously, she wasn't wrong, but that made it no less mortifying to hear spoken out loud like it was a casual thing that they just talked about - they never casually talked about stuff like this, it always ended with some awkward feelings or with one of them getting hit.

"No, you're never wrong, but did you have to say it like that?" She asked, letting her hands slide down her face, stretching her skin along with them as Shelby chuckled, coming back over to bend down and press a kiss to her cheek, and then another one before pulling back, looking at both of them in the mirror.

"Yeah, I did." No, you didn't. "You know I did, that was kind of funny." She pointed out, and Juliette rolled her eyes, pulling away from Shelby so that she could turn and actually look at her again as opposed to just staring at her reflection.

Eye contact. I hate you.

"It would've been funny if it was anyone else in the world, but it was mortifying since it was about me." She clarified, and Shelby frowned, nodding as she tucked some of Juliette's hair out of her face, her gleaming eyes telling Juliette that she actually wasn't sorry about what she'd said, not in the slightest.

Dick.

"You have such an interesting level of shame surrounding intimacy and sex, do you talk about that with your therapist?" Shelby asked, a very candid question that Juliette hated hearing as she grimaced, shaking her head. She talked about a fear of emotional intimacy, sure, but she hadn't really talked about the same that she had surrounding sex. Probably because the idea of talking about sex with a trained professional made her want to crawl right out of her skin and die... Which was a really good sign that she probably really did need to be talking about it with someone.

Would she? Probably not, but at least she was self-aware enough to know that it was something that would be beneficial to bring up to her therapist if she was ever feeling it... Hell, if she did that she'd probably have to kill herself the next day, that was the only way to properly open up: Tell them everything and then get rid of any evidence that what was said could be true so that it could be denied post mortem.

Juliette grimaced... Dark fucking thought, what the hell is wrong with you? She'd missed her appointment this week, she was sure that that wasn't helping.

"Who are you talking to right now, Shelbs? Do you think I'd bring up my intimacy and sex things with my therapist? Really think about that for me." She sighed, uncapping the lipstick on the vanity so that she could apply it as Shelby sighed, nodding with a grimace - it wasn't like this was some big, well-kept secret, she'd always struggled to talk about the good, bad, and ugly of life. Therapy helped that, but it sure as fuck didn't really do anything to fix it. Not yet anyway, that was something that she was actively working towards every day, because obviously she wanted to be better, she wanted to be normal, she wanted to emote as everyone else did, there were just extra steps involved for her.

Shelby sighed, hanging her head before she rested it on the back of Juliette's, making her pitch forward a bit into the lipstick. She gasped, going to wipe it away as Shelby lifted her head and sucked air through her teeth.

"Shit, sorry." She turned her around, pressing the back of her hips into the dresser as she carefully ran her finger under Juliette's lips, looking down on her with hooded eyes that made her shiver. God, why are you all so hot? Truly, this friend group was lethal for a gay girl to be a part of... And they were... All very gay, which didn't help. "There, all fixed." She said, pushing back from Juliette as she walked towards the door, pausing before she put her hand on the handles so that she could turn back, looking at Juliette with a grin. "And obviously I knew you weren't talking to her about this shit, but you should. It'll fucking free you, dude. I had to do it, it was awkward, but it helped, and I want the same for you. I want you to feel as free as I do." She said, and Juliette blinked, feeling a bit... Shocked. She hadn't expected Shelby to say that, not that she should've been expecting anything less, it just hadn't been on her mind as a serious thing that Shelby would consider.