Spitfire ━ Jasper Hale

20 ━ NO CONTROL

  Jasper grimaced, but didn't look away from the books. "Before I was changed, I fought during the American Civil War," he admitted.

  Something in Shadow stilled, coiling away from the information. She knew enough of her American history— enough to know that his next words would be very, very integral to her judgement of Jasper Hale's character.

  Sensing her reproach, Jasper's lips curled in a bitter smile. "I betrayed my family and my state, to fight with the Union."

  Shadow collapsed against the couch behind her, relieved by the information. "Christ, I would've never spoken to you again if you were a Confederate."

  Jasper scowled, "I have morals."

  "Sorry," she winced, not wanting to dismay him from telling his story. "You can keep going, if you want."

Jasper did, but kept his back turned to her. "I was tasked with escorting the women and children to safety. It's how I met the vampire who changed me."

Shadow was confused, having assumed Carlisle was responsible for changing the entirety of the Cullen family. Still, she didn't ask questions. She didn't want to distract him, not when this was clearly so important.

"Her name was Maria," Jasper said and the softness with which he said her name made some part of her flare white-hot. "And when she changed me, I found myself thrown from one war to the next." He sat on the armrest of the couch she sat on, eyes distant. Lost to some memory.

  Shadow felt something in her stir. She knew it was his power, letting her feel that memory with him. Shadow inhaled sharply with that sudden swell of emotion— and the pain and rage that came with it.

"There were territorial disputes between the vampires," he continued. "Maria intended to expand and she needed numbers in order to do it, but she also needed strength."

  This part, she thought to herself, this is the part that's going to hurt. Shadow rested a hand on his knee, comforting. Jasper still wouldn't look at her.

  But, his expression was still. So still. "Newborn vampires are the strongest, but they're not very good at controlling themselves. She needed my gifts in order to train them and—" Jasper halted, that stillness morphing into grief.

  "You don't have to tell me," Shadow spoke quickly, eyes burning with the weight of his emotions.

  Jasper closed his eyes. "I just don't want this to change the way you look at me," he told her, his voice so soft she almost missed it.

  "It won't," she promised. Shadow was more afraid that it would hurt him, rather than damn her opinion on the Hale boy. The thought had never even crossed her mind.

  When he finally looked at her, his sorrow almost burst right through her. "I won't hold you to that," he said, that cold hand resting over hers. She didn't flinch away.

  However, before Shadow could argue her point, Jasper continued. "When the newborn strength faded, she had me kill them," he explained. "And the worst part was that I was good at it. My gift made them trust me, made it easier to attack when they least expected it."

  The pain in his voice made her want to weep.

  Jasper drew up his sleeve. Shadow followed his fingers as they pointed out the scars across his skin. Gashes— no. They were bite marks. Places where the newborn vampires fought to protect themselves. To live, even if it meant tearing another person to pieces.