I'm a Cyborg's Pet

Chapter 53/Him/And all I got was this lousy singing voice

"They all say that. How many times do I have to tell people I'm off the menu" said Joe.

"So where does Miss explosion-in-a-paint-factory coming to this," said 1945 nodding at me.

"Little miss celebrate Holi early here gave me the soylent green to do it. " said Joe.

"Loaned" corrected Kalya.

1945 looked at me "I can't imagine what deviant and perverted act a hot chick like that would want you to do for two packets of Soylent green, but whatever it is I'm up for it," he said.

"Their friends I just gave it to them," I said.

"Really because there is a mansion out on Long island I've been looking at for ages" said 1945.

I smirked, he smirked.

"Seriously where do you get soylent green like that?" said 1945.

"He took me to the city it was a free gift," I said.

"Why did he take you to the city?"

"I'm his pet. Or intern and I think I'm redefining it," I said.

"Your Pet girl? You mean your YCF girl?" said 1945 peering at me obviously trying to think of me without the makeup.

I nodded. "Has everyone seen that stupid YouTube video but me?" I said.

"You're still alive? You realise this proves god exists cos there is no other way that's happening" said 1945 incredulously.

"No she's dead but her ghost comes round every Christmas to good little girls and boys and a gives out packets of soylent green, but only if you believe in the soylent green fairy," said Kayla.

"That would explain the face," said 1945.

"Don't give him ideas," said Joe.

"She's been outside,  does she glow in the dark to?" said 1945 to Joe.

"Not the last time I looked," I said.

"I guess you must feel pretty proud" said Joe.

"Proud of what?" I said.

"Saving our glorious master overlord's life in the helicopter. You rebooted him," said Joe. Clearly, the harem had nothing else to do but speed gossip.

"I'm sorry. Rebooting? is that wrong? Does that happen much?" I said.

"Often enough they have a large staff in the processor farm who's job it is to do it, " said Kayla.

"My god an entire life of switching machines on then off again how demeaning," I said.

"Hey that's my job," said 1945.

"Sorry," I said

"I'm only messing with you, it is demeaning, I also play chess against him, from grand chess master to this," said 1945. I think his collar went off. "hey I've got to go. You harem girl, this was the worst date ever."

"Harem boy. " said Joe.

"Have you looked in the mirror recently? You YCF, girl don't go taking any more chances and if you get on cinder let me know first. You foxy girl, If anyone was willing to put up with me and hand over two packets of soylent green for me I would sit on his/her lap for the rest of my life with a grin the size of the golden gate bridge. I hope you don't mind but given I'm the only one losing out on this date, I'm going to be thinking about you two guys kissing when I'm in bed tonight."

"Too much information," said Kayla.

"Hang tuff," said 1945 walking off.

"Don't forget to say what a bad date it was on Cinder" said Joe as 1945 left. "It's a real pain. I originally thought I would have to only wade through all the lesbians in the house saying no. Unfortunately anyone can make a bid so I have to go through all the boys too. I even had a robot for some reason.. I'd so like to get my hands on that software."

"What's worse is he's got more boy's trying to date him than girls," said Kayla.

"Don't listen to her, she's annoyed I got more date requests than her," said Joe.

"Grr" said Kayla to Joe.

"Look I'm from the harem I'm exotic," said Joe.

"You exotic? That's fine talk. You flunked belly dancing at the factory" said Kayla." the last girl I dated all she wanted to know about was you. I'm like 'call your self a lesbian' and she's like well 'you called your self a lesbian. I ask you!"

"Stop just stop. As I said as soon as word gets out, people will let us get together. I didn't realise so few people knew about what the harem girls were like. Speaking of which. I checked with the girls tol me" Joe began after looking around. I loved the way he made little air quotes with his hands around the 'girls' bit.

"Nothing solid about 'thingying'. It's a kind of feeding of neural energy. If he does it often enough regularly enough, it will drai nall  your mental energy you might die."

"How often are we talking about?" I said.

"No more eight to twelve depends upon the gap between. He's eating your life force, said one girl. Others say it's how they reproduce - if he let's you drain his energy he's trying to turn you into one of them a cyborg."

"You're not feeling evilish?" said Kayla.

"I was briefly thinking of subjugating your sorry asses" I said

Joe and Kayla looked horrified.

"I'm joking. Look how do they know all this?" I said.

"Apparently Lady Zola, Lady Villeria all have those marks on their spines"

"So from that information you could think this is how cyborgs you know. How do you say it with a PG 13 filter? Build love?" I said

"Build as in Make" said Kayla. I nodded.

"Who told you all this?" I asked.

"A guy I met on my darts team told me," said Joe.

"You have a darts team?" said Kayla.

"No... Its more of a mini darts league" said Joe honestly.

My mind filled with a vision of groups of transvestite courtesans playing darts in high heels. I guess this would explain my Master wanted to keep this secret. There was a thin line between kinky wild sexy and complete stupidity. This had crossed the line and stamped it's passport on the way through. When the A.I's sucked up all human knowledge on the internet they sucked up a tanker load of pornography. I guess like a teenage boy with nothing else to go on, they got a pretty twisted view of humanity and it's reproductive sports. Perhaps the machine part of masters brain was filled a very weird branch of this collective subconscious. I caught my self feeling sorry for him, but reminded myself he was wiping out large numbers of humanity so could suck my chic.

"Are there sexy cheerleaders and stuff?" asked Kayla.

"No, it's just a board around the office. I shouldn't have said that," said Joe.

"Hagdrid! So it's all sexy secretaries?" I asked. This was getting very weird again.

"Yes! That's it exactly sexy, secretaries. We occasionally goof off OK" said Joe relieved for some reason.

"Your voice is all weird," Joe said to me.

"I wazz wondering that. It feels like I've got a sore throat" I said in an odd way.

"I think you should see a Doctor. I'm surprised your collar hasn't forced you to go yet" said Joe.

"The term doctor has been depreciated. You need to go to technical support<zing>" said my collar.

"Come one we'll take you," said Kayla. Finishing her lunch and pinching Joe's ass.

****

What has happened to Jenny? Will she be all right? What has she been infected with? Join us on Tuesday to find out

Thanks - this was all made possible by your fab votes- We thank you. Don't stop don't ever stop.