Undefined (Book #1 Joshler)

CHAPTER 51: The Truth Is.. I'm Insane

I started choking her.
'HARDER! DO IT HARDER!'
'gladly.'
I tightened my grip.
She grabbed at my hands trying to pry them away but I'm much stronger then her.
I gritted my teeth.
"Tyler." she strained to say.
"Yes?" I asked innocently.
"What are you doing? Stop."
I leaned down close to her ear.
"Why would I stop when I'm having so much fun?" I whispered.
I pulled back at looked her in the eye.
She stared at me wide eyed.
I grinned evilly.
'SHE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT SHE GOT HERSELF INTO.'
'she doesn't which makes it even more fun.'
I pulled one hand away keeping the other firmly applying pressure.
I then punched her across the face.
She winced then tried to scream for help I tightened my grip again making her screaming stop.
"Don't scream sweetheart it'll only make things worse."
I said cheerfully.
She stared at me with a terrified expression.
That's right, fear me.
I punched her again.
And again.
And again.
She gasped as she started to become light headed from lack of oxygen.
I loosened my grip to let her breathe.
I'm not done playing with her yet.
"Tyler why are you doing this? Where did this come from? This isn't you." she said her voice raspy.
"Darling, this is me."
"No it's not I've never seen you like this. What happened to the sweet innocent Tyler?"
"All an act sugar."
"Why would you put on an act like that?"
"Because it makes it more fun. That's all this is. It's all part of the fun. Part of the show."
"The show?"
"The show. Gotta keep myself entertained somehow."
I leaned back and reached under the mattress, pulling out a pencil sharpener blade I had stashed there when Josh brought me my notebook.
I held it up for her to see.
"Pretty isn't it?"
"Tyler what are you doing with that?"
"Having fun."
"Ty-"
She was cut off by me bringing the blade up to her face and gently running it over her cheek, I didn't pierce the skin.
I just grazed it.
I tilted my head to the side.
"You have kids right?"
"Tyler please."
"ANSWER ME!"
"Yes I have kids."
"Tell me about them."
"Um.. They uh..."
I gently dragged the blade across her cheek, ripping through the first layer of skin, blood seeping from it.
She cried out it pain.
"Shh shh it's okay."
"Tyler stop."
"Shhhh it's okay. Everything's okay."
"Tyler stop please!"
"Why are you not having fun?"
"I'm not having fun at all Tyler stop this please."
"Your right I'm sorry... I.. I don't know.. I.. Why am I doing this?" I sat back a bit.
"I don't know Tyler just stop please your scaring me."
I smiled.
"I'm a good actor aren't I?"
She swallowed nervously but remained quiet
I furrowed my eyebrows.
"I ASKED A QUESTION!"
"Y-yes your a good actor."
I smiled.
"Thank you."

My head snapped to the door when it burst open.
Dr. James and a few guards stood with horrified looks on their face.
I looked back down to Dr. Varrence.
I now realised the phone in the hand, she must have texted Dr. James when I had my back turned.
"You bitch."
"Ty-"
I smacked her.
The guards went to make a move to grab me.
I held the blade to Dr. Varrences throat.
"Come near me and she dies.
"Tyler calm down. It's okay you don't have to do this." Dr. James spoke as Dr. Varrence started crying.
"I know I don't have to. I want to."
"Why would you want to?"
I didn't answer I just caressed Dr. Varrences face.
She flinched away from my hand.
I grabbed her throat again.
"Why don't we play a game?"
"A game?" Dr. James asked.
"I'm going to ask you questions and for every question you get wrong I make a new cut."
"Tyler no." he spoke.
"Great first question. Whats the first thing you said to me once I arrived here?"
Dr. James looked panicked.
"Five seconds. Five. Four. Thre-"
"I don't know.. Hello?"
"Wrong."
I made a small cut similar to the first one on the opposite cheek.
"Well then what was it?"
"I'm surprised you don't remember. The first thing you said to me was and I quote 'your harmless you'll be easy to take care of.' am I Dr. James? Hmm?"
He stared at me in shock.
"AM I HARMLESS?!"
He didn't say anything.
The next thing I know Josh is running into the room out of breath.
"Ooo more people. More people means more fun. Want to have some fun Joshie?"
He looked around in confusion.
I clenched my teeth.
"Joshie?"
"I uh.. What are you doing Tyler?"
I sighed and stood up, kicking Dr. Varrence in the ribs and walked over to the door that was left open.
I forcefully slammed it shut.
"Tyler? Baby is everything okay?"
"Everythings great Josh." I said with a huge smile.
"Baby your scaring everyone."
My expression dropped to a serious one.
"Good."
"Tyler whats going on? are you okay?"
I stared at him for a few seconds, then looked around the room.
I dropped to my knees and started sobbing. (no I'm not okay, but hey I like it or do I hate it? Who knows.)
Josh ran to my side.
"Hey its okay."
I turned to Josh and knocked him over before taking the blade and running it down his arm, blood poured from it.
He hissed at the pain.
"Tyler what the hell?"
"Shut up."
Dr. James started moving toward me, I seen him out of the corner of my eye.
I quickly sprang up and pinned him to the wall.
He tried to push me off but again I'm stronger.
"I fucking hate you, you know that, you really get on my nerves. You don't know how hard its been keeping character when I'm around you."
"Character?" he asked.
"Yes. You see this is all a big show for my entertainment only."
"What are you talking about?"
I smiled then kneed him in the stomach.
A guard grabbed me from behind.

"NOO!!!"
I squirmed trying to get out of his grip.
"LET GO!!"
'YOU CAN TAKE HIM!'
I kicked him in the shin with the back of my heel.
He yelped and let go.
I ran to the far corner of the room, starting to cry again.
"Why are you crying?" Dr. James asked.
"I DON'T KNOW I JUST AM!"
To be honest I have no clue why I'm crying.
Josh helped Dr. Varrence up, letting her lean on him for support as the guards backed me into the corner.

I still had the blade in my hand.
I looked down at it then pressed it to my wrist.
"Touch me and I'll do it."
"Tyler stop put the blade down."
"I'm serious I'll do it."
"Tyler put it down baby please. Don't leave me."
"Go fuck yourself."
He looked hurt.
"Your all a bunch of idiots. You all fell for my stupid act."
"What act?"
"Oh my god are you really that stupid? 'oh look at me I'm an innocent scared little boy with mental problems and trust issues who doesn't know what sex is and doesn't know why I do the things I do, blurry makes me do those things.' you guys really believed that?"
"Wait... You knew what sex was before your parents told you... You knew what you were doing?"
"Of course I knew what I was fucking doing I'm not a child. I knew exactly what I was doing to you. You think I haven't watched porn before?"
"You have?"
"Yes. I'm a teenage boy what do you expect?"
Josh looked shocked.
"You know I could have been out of here I could have pulled it off, but the thing is.. I don't want to leave."
"Why wouldn't you want to leave?"
"Please. I would rather be locked up in a room by myself then have to interact with people on a daily basis. I'm much better company for myself then anyone else could ever be."
No one said anything.
One of the guards took a step toward me.
I pressed the blade deeper, not even being affected by the pain.
Blood started running down my arm and dripping onto the floor.
"Tyler stop your bleeding!"
I licked some of the blood, keeping eye contact with Josh as I did.
The guard kept moving toward me.
Without warning I quickly dragged the blade across my skin, ripping it open.
A line of blood now prominent.
"Tyler!"
"Okay well that's a lot more blood then I thought there would be."
I said as I stared down at my wrist.
I dropped the blade and started panicking.
There's a lot of blood.
I looked up at everyone, no one made any moves toward me.
I started shaking.
I'm scared.
I don't want to die, I thought I did but I don't. I don't want to. I just wanted to cut a little bit, I didn't mean to go too deep.
"Why is there so much blood?!"
"Tyler calm down It's okay but you need to let us help you. We need to get that fixed before you bleed out. Are you going to let us?"
I started breathing heavily and got dizzy.
I stumbled back and leaned against the wall before sliding down it.
"Tyler let us help."
"Well don't just fucking stand there! Help me god dammit!!"
I screamed clutching to the arm that had blood pouring from it.

They wasted no time in running over.
Dr. James ripped a part of my bed sheet off and wrapped it around the cut, apply pressure to it.
My breaths were raged.
"Am I going to to die?" I asked.
"Lets hope not."
"I don't want to die."
"Shh calm down."
The room started spinning so I squeezed my eyes shut and leaned my head back against the wall.
"This is your fault!" I screamed at the guard who was walking toward me a few minutes ago.
Tears continuously running down my cheeks.
I looked up at Josh and Dr. Varrence who stood frozen watching the scene unfold.
I closed my eyes again, starting to get tired.
Then darkness.