STATIC (LGBT)

Chapter 46

'Fooling around' that´s exactly what it was for me now. Experimenting and finding different sounds to combine. It was also a great feeling to reconstruct already exsiting music and alter them to make them sound, in my point of view, better.

...But, I would always stop for the same reason. The joy that music brought to me was now related to Zoë. Every single time. And then, I would actually stop and head back to my room.

This time, however, I didn't wish to feel that way so I simply headed back up without any hesitation. Throught the empty kitchen and living room, and through the silent corridors. Dad was at work and mom was to return tonight – my Dad would pick her up... I have thought about how to confront her but it is incredibly hard considering how I feel like I've made my decision already. I don't want to go and continue whatever she agreed to be done to me. I don't need it.

I shook my head perfectly knowing that bothering to think about something that has yet to come is useless. Whatever thought about my mom would have to wait until about an hour before she gets home...

Once in my room, I made myself study a little bit of everything, Probably, the hardest out all of them was Mathematics... I still am not sure why what going on in my head when I chose ithe course. I mean, it´s not THAT hard but it is probably the most challenging out of all of my subjects. It would always take me quite a while to fully understand a topic which is why I left it for last.

Scanning the pages of work I had done for each of my 7 subjects made me realize how much free time I generally have... Free time that I now, usually, spend with Zoë...

I glanced at the window that now reflected the after-noon light. I could bet against every odd that Zoë is in there, in her room. I wouldn't know what she's doing since it could be anything from listening to music to sleeping to studying. Same thing as I've been doing... and I can also bet that she's become more productive, like me, because there is really no desire to think about that morning.

What if I do decide to leave this place?

Alex, I thought to myself, It's what you're going to do. You know that.

Yeah, I know that. Whatever I end up wishing to do it will be music related and, obviously, if it's trumpet playing I will have to go to leave and study at an actual college, not stay at the IMT... even if I don't choose to go to France. Also, if I go into Music Engineering I would leave for sure...

And I really did not expect Zoë to find any interest in physical therapy... her petience is incredibly low, and with some patients injuries or physical rehabilitation can take a long time... Yet, I can't help but see Zoë doing it. Aiding a person with no legs to sit down on his wheelchair, guiding a stretching excercise for someone who's lost an arm.... Those are extreme cases but if she wants to do it like her Dad, she would probably work with war veterans. Nothing would interest her more than their stories.

That was probably her reason to do that. Help those who've experienced tough things... things probably worse than hers.

–

ZOË

I brought my hands up to my face and dragged them down my cheeks, feeling my skin being pulled down by my fingertips. Yawning, I turned my face to the nightstand, where I had just put a new alarm clock, and opened my eyes wide when I looked at the time. It was 3pm, way too late for the second week of vacation. It was already Thursday and wasting my time was not going to bring any benefit to my finals results. But, well, no need to dwell on it. All I needed was to stand up and take a shower.

I sort of made my bed, this week with red covers, and headed to my desk. I noticed how messy my notes were but because I had classified them according to chapter and subject, I knew the content in them.