Cadence leaves an abusive boyfriend after years of abuse. She wants to find love, true love, can't live without you love! Can she make it through the lust, lies, and betrayal? Follow her on her journey as she meets new people and loses people along...
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A/N this chapter is dedicated to my girl shannonab97 for staying up late talking to me when I was having a rough time. I love you girl. Thank you for being there for me.
CADENCE POV
Life is a series of moments. The moments that define who you are. It's up to you what moment you choose. Me I pick the moments that build me up. The ones that make me smile. Sure I can let those bad moments define me. I can let them take ahold of me like they so desperately want.
I'm stronger then those weak moments. When I look back I want to remember the moments that I discovered my strength. The moments that showed me what I can really do. You don't need a man or a women for that matter to define who you are. All you need is yourself. You define those moments. So how do you handle them? Do you give into the weak moments and do what they take you to do? Or do you fight with everything inside of you? I pick the latter! You are always more important then anything. Your parents try to take you down? Your have a significant other that makes you feel bad, even if it's unintentionally? You have a sibling that try's to make you feel less? Well guess what? It's in your control how you ALLOW those people to make you feel. Put yourself first! Cause you matter!! That's why right now I'm choosing me. Do I care about those boys? Absolutely! But I come first. At the end of the day I am stuck with me 24/7. I can't let someone else try to define who I am. Hate me all you want. I don't care. I can't think about other people's happy or other people's moments. All I can think about and worry about is my own. That's life. Worry about your moments. Worry about your happy. It's time to prove I can do it. It's time to prove to myself that I'm good enough. Not good enough for someone else. Just that I'm good enough for myself. It's hard to fight the things we are afraid of, sometimes we just need a little help. Luckily I have Sarah Beth. I have someone who is always in my corner.
As I stand in front of my canvas with a brush in hand. I remember the first time I ever held a paint brush. My dad took me to the Luxembourg Garden when I was 6. I saw someone painting and I was so fascinated by it. My dad asked the artist if there was a way I could try it. The artist was more then happy to oblige. When I stepped in front of the canvas I remember closing my eyes and taking in the smell of the paint. It was the most intoxicating smell. It took me to a place in my imagination I didn't even know existed. I opened my eyes and the artist placed a brush in my hand. It felt like that smooth piece of wood in my hand with animal hair bristles was apart of my hand, a part of my soul. I dipped the brush into the black paint on the pallet. I watched like it was in slow motion, the paint cling to the bristles. I lifted the brush and placed a stroke on the rough canvas. I watched as the paint filled the tiny holes and the rough streaks left behind. It felt like I was transported to somewhere else. I felt peace. The only thing the existed was me and the canvas. From that moment on I knew that this was going to be what I did for the rest of my life.
