?Running With Scissors ?

?c h a p t e r 09?

His jaw opens a centimeter. "No."

No? "No, what?"

Luca sighs again. I'm starting to think it causes him physical pain to answer my questions. "Not awake. He won't hate you. You can't call him yet and the damage wasn't- well, it's livable."

"But how do you know he won't hate me? I-I left him. I walked away while he was dying and... that breaks like all the best friends codes ever made."

For a while he's silent like usual, leaving me to my self-destructive thoughts. Michael was there for me when I was all alone and broken. He picked up my pieces and helped me rebuild myself one brick at a time and even though I never talked about my past with him, he knew exactly what I needed to move on. And how did I repay him? By leaving him to bleed out...

"Care Bear."

My head snaps to Luca who, by all accounts, doesn't look like the kind of man who says either of those words; the words only Michael calls me.

"Wha-"

"You're his Care Bear, right?" Luca grimaces at saying my nickname. "He told me about your weekend dinners and those inside jokes about pickles and rockets. I still don't get the joke but you do. He loves you. He'll understand."

While what he said was nice, it doesn't fix the guilt settling in my stomach. If I could go back, I would have told Michael everything about who I really am. I would have made every moment last but mostly, I wouldn't have made him leave to get groceries. More than anything I wish I could hesr those words from Michael himself.

I didn't know I was crying until a tear hit my chest. I wipe it away with my free hand and that's when I realize that our hands are still intertwined. Luca noticed too and quickly pulls away.

He clears his throat after a moment of me looking out at the passing moonlit landscape. "I don't do crying. Fix your face."

Sniffling away the last of my waterworks, I push down the pain like always and put on a smile.

"What? These aren't sad tears, they're happy tears. See." I point to my face. "I'm so happy you can speak more than five words that it brought me to tears."

Luca grumbles like a manly avalanche. "Isn't it past your bedtime?"

The clock on the dash reads 1:04am and I instinctively yawn. I'm never ever a morning person but I'm not a night owl either. Between being on the run and the stress over Michael, I'm even more exhausted. I need my whole twelve hours.

"Get some rest, Scissors."

I close my eyes and Lea my head against the window while I correct him with a mumble that my name is not scissors but I doubt he heard. As I drift into a semi- conscious sleep, I feel his hand slide into mine.

***
My body slams against something really hard and then jerks the other direction, hitting the door. That's how I wake up. Of course the jostling is thanks to Luca's not so fancy driving.

When I rub the side of my head, I notice that our hands aren't locked together anymore either; both of his hands are on the wheel as he Tokyo Drifts around the dark back roads.

I lay my hands in my lap willing myself not to scratch. It's worse today, if that's even possible. My thighs and lady bits feel like they're on fire still and I can't stop from rubbing myself. To get my mind off the itchiness, I focus on the road signs. I can tell we're heading east but I have no idea what our destination actually is. I could ask but he's not normally very forthcoming so I save that breath and move on.

The clock on the dash tells me I only slept a few hours and it's still early morning. I hate this morning thing Luca has going on. Why can't we drive normal times? Won't a car this late at night be more suspicious?

"Can we stop for the night already? I'm tired of grinding my cooch against the seat and I can't properly scratch it sitting next to you." I make a point to dramatically scratch.

"You're not supposed to scratch."

"Uh, tell that to my vagina!" I yell at him. I really wish I could rub some poison oak on his balls and see how he feels about stopping then.

"I will not speak to your vagina." He says and I bust out laughing.

He never replies to my banter and the one time he does its referring to my itchy, swollen lady parts. He's so darn confusing. Maybe our little heart to heart earlier melted the giant ice block he uses as a shield.

"So is that a yes? I could really soak in some Epsom salt and-"

"No."

"Is that 'no' actually a 'yes'?" I half tease but am mostly serious.

"That's a 'no' as in ask me again and I'll leave you on the side of the road for Eli to find." I was only playing around with him but when he said that, my face fell.

He isn't playing.

I turn my self away from him as much as possible in a car and watch out the window without replying. Luca knows more than he let on. He probably knew who I was when he walked into my salon and if he didn't lie about working for him and my ransom, then why is he helping me run? Why did he come find me? Who is he and what role do I play in his plans?

It doesn't really matter. If this random guy wants to be mean to me than I can just stay quiet. Besides I have nothing left to say to the man who threatened to return me to the life I ran from.

The only reason I trust him enough to stay is he warned me about the suits who definitely did not show up at my home for a tea party. But is that enough?

I open the family size bag of popcorn and begin to munch. I eat when I'm upset and also when I'm happy and also when I'm sleepy. I just like food. Maybe one day I'll find someone who looks at me the way I look at salted caramel popcorn.

Halfway through the bag I drift off again, hoping we'll be wherever we're heading when I wake up.

***
Boom!

We saw a soft side to Luca for approximately half a second before he returned to his usual closed off self! What's up with that?