Forget The First (On Hold For Major Editing And Rewriting)

8. "It is! I can't stand another episode of Paw Patrol."

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"Maia wake up, we have group." City sing-songs awakening me from a beautiful dream I was having of Joel carrying me through a field of daisies. Why can I never get him out of my mind?

"I'm up, I'm up." I mumble rubbing the sleep from my eyes and then I pull myself out of bed to get dressed. Once I'm done I drag my feet across the hard carpeted floor to the hallway where nurses are taking vitals and asking whether or not patients are having suicidal ideations. I was confused as hell I had no idea what that was, turns out it is suicidal thoughts. Couldn't they have just said that though instead of having to be all doctory about it? After my vitals were taken we are led to the cafeteria for breakfast. We trudge to the group room for morning check-in after breakfast.

"Good morning Ms. Maia please take a seat next to City there." An older guy who I assume to be the group therapist points to a cushioned chair that is placed next to City. The older guy, who I now know to be Dr. Rodgers, goes over what I have to say for introductions.

"Alright, so say your name, then say something you like about yourself, and end with how you are feeling.

"Hi, um, I'm Maia, I like my eyes and I'm feeling tired." 

"Tired isn't an emotion Maia please try again." If I have to do this every day I think I might actually go crazy.

"Well, it should be." I quip earning me giggles and "I hear thats" from people in the group.

"Maia please?" I guess he's not gonna let up.

"Ok, even though I think it is entirely too early in the morning to know what I'm feeling I guess I'm feeling anxious."

"See now was that so hard?"

"Yes." again I earn myself giggles from around the room.

The group is interesting, I don't really talk but I listen. 

"This makes me feel like what happened to me isn't too bad." I whisper to City.

"Don't, we've all got our junk. If you think like that you'll start to think that your feelings are insignificant and then you'll never get it out and then you'll never feel better." City whispers back to me. How is she so wise about this and still be in here, I guess she's right we all have our junk. 

The rest of the day zoomed by pretty fast after the group session was lunch, the food was absolutely horrid. Then after that, they have the teens go into a small-ish room for "school" which honestly all we did was watch a movie about speaking up for yourself, Freedom 抖阴社区rs I think it was called. Next was probably the worst part of my day, gym, we only did yoga which wasn't so bad but it was still physical. We had another group session before lights out that went pretty much the same as the first. You know, the therapist asks serious questions I give quirky and sarcastic answers, as per usual.

"So how was your first day?" City inquires as I flop backwards onto the hard mattress.

"It was interesting but boring at the same time. You know what I mean?" I stand up and pad towards the window that outlooks over the tiny playground. It breaks my heart to see how many little kids are here.

"Yeah I know the feeling, it was the same for me my first day." City slowly walks to where I am.

"Pity isn't it?" City frowns looking at what I am.

"What?"

"All the kids that are out in here because their parents don't want to deal with them. It's ridiculous that they don't get to have a real childhood because their parents messed them up so bad." City peers out at the gloomy scene of the rickety swing set.