Returning Red

#8: Bucket Lists.

I leaned against the couch as he plopped on it. "Which year?"

"I guess two years back. Last year we went for a picnic in Paris. It was one of May's bucket lists." Jason muttered and my smile grew.

I walked over and sat on the armrest of the couch as I watched him with stronger curiosity. "Bucket lists?"

Jason pouted before he completely turned to me and bobbed his head. "When we turned twenty, we each wrote a list of five things we wanted to do in life before we died. Every Christmas dinner we do a lucky draw and have Aiden pick out a chit from the pile. Whosever name it reads, we're doing one of the things from that particular person's list on the New Year."

"That's so cool," I was laughing and grinning at the same time. "Tell me everything you've done after making this pact."

Jason narrowed his eyes into slits as he thought about it. "Uh, the first New Year we went to a Taylor Swift concert. It was Liam's pick," Jason looked at me and we both scoffed at the same time. "Second year was May's turn and we went to the water park in Tropical Islands, that was super fun. Third-year it was oh--" his expressions changed and my smile faded. "--It was Austin's turn and we went Scooba Diving. He took the deepest dive of all."

Of course, he would choose the ocean when it came to ticking off bucket lists.

"What did you do the next year?" I quickly move on and Jason beams again.

"It was my turn and we got the tattoos. I had to blackmail them so much because none of them wanted it." Jason shook his head and I laughed. "Last year it was May's pick again and she chose a picnic in Paris. If you ask me, it was overrated. The only thing good about that place is the Eiffel Tower. Nothing else."

"Seriously?" I scoffed. "Come on, the food is good. But I stayed there for like three days when I came to check out the fashion week so I don't have a traveler's experience."

He gulped but his smile was still mired on his face. "You came to Paris?"

I looked away and let out a painful breath. "Yes. It was for work."

"Hmm, sure." he nodded looking away too. He took a loud breath and I turned to him, "This year we'll do one of your bucket lists for New Year. What say?"

He was confirming my stay in the more oblique ways but I was seeing right through it. I nodded, without promising him anything. I wasn't in the position to give out promises. I could only hope for it. Of course, I wanted to be with them and do all the crazy yet normal things and lead a normal life. Friends, work, family, relationships, they had it all sorted. I could all but hope for a life like that.

"What would your top 1 be?" Jason asked me and I reckoned he was talking about my bucket lists. "The distance, the time, the money, if none of it matters, what would you want to do?"

I'd never thought about what my bucket lists would be. Those were the least of my concerns in the last eight years. I realized I didn't have a personal list of favorite things to do in my life. All I had were checklists and to-do lists that I ticked every single day.

Jason's question made me think so hard because I wanted to know what my top 1 would be if I could do anything in the world. His eyes dropped to his knuckles and I saw surprise flash over his eyes. Maybe I was taking too much time to think. I glance at the blank 85-inch television screen and a floating thought enters my mind. I don't overthink it.

"Fortnite." I turn to Jason and he looks rattled. "To play Fortnite for an entire night with the bin, sipping cold coffees, munching pepperoni pizza from Pop's, and staying in this house forever. And this is not my top 1, this is the only thing on my list, I guess."