Letting Him Go

Chapter 4 - The Split

"Lea," she chokes out, covering her ears with her sleeves and shaking her head in horror. "She can't—I'm so sorry," she frantically looks around for an escape.

"Shh, shh..." He murmurs into her ear, wrapping his arms around her shoulders and holding her steady.

"She's with her grandma," I croak, gripping the railing, still frozen in place. I'm not sure she hears me. Her eyes gloss over and flutter closed as she slumps in Bradley's arms. Carino, what have you done?

It dawns on me that I should help her. I jog down the rest of the stairs and approach them.

"I got her," his ice blue eyes send a searing pain through my chest as he scoops her up with ease and carries her over to the sofa. Her head wobbles against his shoulder as he carefully sets her down. Her fingers are curled around the hem of his shirt. I can't watch anymore. I go to the kitchen and try to think of the most he'll allow me to do for her. I opt for filling up a glass of water.

When I return, she lays across the sofa, her head in his lap. He stares out the window, absentmindedly tracing patterns on her temple. I almost feel guilty for walking into the room at all. I set the glass down on the coffee table and he smiles gratefully.

"I can...go out for a while," I whisper, sitting down on the arm of the sofa next to him. Her eyes fly open at the sound of my voice.

"This is your home," she mumbles, her bloodshot eyes staring blankly ahead.

"Yes."

"Don't leave," she slurs.

Why not?

Suddenly, her little shoulders lurch forward and she vomits in his lap. The stench of cheap watermelon vodka fills the air. My hands fly up to cover my nose.

"I-I'll clean it up," he mutters, hooking his arms under armpits and sitting her up. Her head rolls backwards, unsupported by her neck, and silent tears stream from her lifeless eyes.

"I think I should just put her to bed." He is completely unbothered by the pools of vomit that stain his pants as he lifts his clean sleeve to wipe her mouth.

"I can take care of this." I point with my foot at the puddle of foul liquid in front of me. 

He nods and lifts her up with ease, cradling her to his chest as he walks towards the stairs.

"Guest room," I call after him. He glances back in acknowledgment.

I drop to my knees, wincing at the horrible smell, and pour a generous amount of bleach onto the carpet. I begin to scrub with a towel.

Carino. I scold him again in my head, thinking back to the unanswered text he had sent me just hours ago. It was a warning—he knew that she'd find her way to Bradley in her state of distress. What would happen now? Christian had pushed himself out of the picture...would I be removed as well? I remember the look of defeat in his eyes at the Venice Film Festival.

I notice Lea's pacifier under the sofa. We have a child together. And then I realize that Bradley would never leave. This is supposed to reassure me, but instead I find myself terrified. He wouldn't dare give up his daughter for anything in the world—not for a silly movie, no matter how much it means to him.

Even if it means staying with me.

I shake my head and press my palms into the ground, focusing all my attention on cleaning the only mess that I can control right now.

--

I pad down the hallway towards the open guest room door. I place my hand on the door handle and peek inside. The room is silent and the lights are off.

She's curled up in a ball, encased in a fortress of pillows, one bare leg swung out over the sheets as if she couldn't make up her mind if she was hot or cold. I recognize the red hem of Bradley's Phillies long sleeve shirt bunched up around her neck. My heart swells, painfully, as I spot the second figure on the bed. He lies on top of the covers at her feet, fully clothed, sleeping soundly on his side. One arm is tucked under his head as a pillow and the other is outstretched, his fingers splayed out on her calf. Always touching her, even in his sleep. Unsure of what to do, I begin to retreat, pulling the door closed behind me.

"Hi." He's awake...or is he? I spot a pair of blue eyes in the darkness. I rest my head on the door frame.

"Hi," I reply.

"You are..." He trails off. He must be talking in his sleep. 

"You are so lovely." It comes out clear as day, startling me, and my head snaps up to really look at him. But the moment has passed. His eyes have fallen back closed, succumbing to the tides of unconsciousness.

"Love you." I barely hear it, but it escapes from his lips ever so softly. I smile back at him, heat rushing to my cheeks at his sweet words of affection. Then I see that his hand has moved from below his head to rest on her ankle, and he is stroking her bare skin lightly with his fingertips. I squeeze my eyes shut, fighting back hot tears.

He wasn't talking to me.

**Thank you for reading :) I'll try to get more chapters written as soon as possible. xx**