Deep in our heads

Part 5 - 2014

"It's Natasha now."

"I- I know. I'm sorry."

She shakes her head. "It's okay. James, take her. Steve and I will clear your way."

Suddenly I feel James's arms under my body and I stop myself from screaming out loud. The pain is unbearable at this point and he's touching all of my bruises. Well, it's hard to find an area that's not bruised anyway.

"Sorry," he whispers. "I'm so sorry. I should've recognised that guy, right ? I...We worked for him."

"It's okay, James, don't..." I gulp. My stomach is hurting too much and so are my legs as they bounce in the air. James is running behind Rogers and Natasha and I can't help but worry about what's next. I have no idea where they're taking me. What if they find us ? What if we don't make it out of this alive ? I can't let James die for me. He deserves more than that. I can tell we're out of the building when the sunlight hits my eyes. They're closed but I can see bright red behind my eyelids. I hear a car door opening before I feel the soft leather of a backseat. James sits next to me and he places my legs on the seat, my head on his lap. He runs his hand through my hair even though it's wet and covered in blood.

"Where are we going ?" I ask in a weak voice.

"I-"

"Not to S.H.I.E.L.D.'s." Steve cuts James off. "It's too risky. We're taking you somewhere else. Nat knows a place."

"You shouldn't have come for me."

I open my eyes and they quickly adjust to the daylight so that I can see James's face again. He looks confused and angry.

"We had to," he says before anyone else. "I'll never leave you, you hear me ?"

"I don't deserve this," I whisper. "You can't save me."

"Yes, we-"

"No." I sit up despite James's disagreement and lay a hand on Steve's shoulder. He's the only one who'll want to hear what I'm about to say. "You have to save James while you sill can. You can't save both of us and S.H.I.E.L.D. won't do anything for me anyway."

It's Nat's turn to cut me off. "Y/n, that's not even-"

"I'm not done. Steve, listen to me. Do you want to save James or not ? Do you want to save Bucky ?"

"Y/n, stop," James says as he grabs my other hand.

"Steve. Give me your word you'll do anything to save him."

Rogers looks at me in his mirror. He frowns and looks at Bucky then back at me. He nods slowly.

"I promise."

"Steve, take that back," Bucky protests. "We're not leaving her behind."

"That's not what I promised, Buck. I said I'll do anything to help you. That doesn't mean we can't help her as well."

"And we will, right ?"

"If we can."

Steve's answer doesn't suit James at all and even though she doesn't say anything, I can see Nat isn't totally fine with the idea either. I don't care. I know Steve won't hesitate and that's the important thing. He's a righteous man and he'll go out of his way to save his friend. I lay back down on James's lap and kiss his hand. I take a deep breath in and I try to forget the pain for a moment. James is here and there's a chance things will work out. They probably won't, but... James makes me believe they could. We finally arrive at Nat's hiding place, the one James and I left a few days ago. James immediately lays me down in the bathroom floor.