Changed me

Did He Apologize?

"Curly sue, look at me." lifting my chin up he placed his hands on my face and made me look at him. There were many things about Nile that I liked however, the way he looked at me had to be my favorite. He had this way of making me feel seen. I absolutely hated eye contact it made me uncomfortable but Nile had made it his mission to change that.

" I love Darren." There was finality in words. He left no room for protest or questions. "I will always love him, but he stopped being my dad a very long time ago. I stopped expecting him to apologize to me."

I stayed silent because what could I say right now that would change or make any of this better. That has been one of the hardest parts of this ordeal. I felt powerless like nothing I could do or say would make a difference so I sat quietly. I listened in the moments when he wanted to speak. I sat with him when he just needed company and left him alone when he wanted space. While Nile was learning how to let go of the way life has been I was learning to love someone in a new way.

"Talk to me curly sue."

"I'm not sure what to say." The honesty in the response surprised even me. " I just want to be here for you."

" You have done that Manuela." The name rolling off his tongue smoothly. He took joy in calling me the name my grandmother gave me.

The memory played in my head as I tried to calm my racing nerves. It would all be over today. It would be the last time Nile would have to repeat in detail the moments leading up to his coma. Since waking up that night had came back to him piece by piece. He retold his story to the police, caseworker and social worker. We were all surprised that Darren actually stayed in town after everything that happened.

"What are you thinking about ?" Jake looked so different with a tie on. We sat outside the office waiting for my dad, Nile and Uncle Mike to come out. " And don't say it's nothing because I've learned to read you almost as well as Nile and Lex do. I won't say that out loud to either of them because they're very possessive of you."

Laughing I listened as he spoke " Seriously, I am sometimes concerned about Lex's obsession with you."

"Babe you knew what this was before you started dating me." Lex chimed in.

"Why is your timing so perfect?"

" I told you my ears itch whenever you speak about me." Flipping her hair she stuck herself in between Jake and I. They made the cutest couple and with her now shoulder length hair Lex was happier than I have seen her in awhile. However, if you asked her it had absolutely nothing to do with Jake and everything to do with her new haircut.

"Now Manny, what's wrong?"

"Nothings wrong, I'm just thinking."

" I can't blame you it has been a hell of a few months." Grabbing my head she pulled me to her chest in her signature boob hug. I could not help but laugh and Jake just chose to ignore our actions.

" So is this going to be my life now since I'm here permanently ?" Jake's question was the only indication that he was still paying attention to us.

"Yup" Lex and I said at the same time. Uncle Mike and Jake were spending so much time coming back and forth over the past few months that he just decided that moving here would be best. Part of me knew that it would only be a matter of time before he did that because he was hellbent on being with Nile. He was also determined to kill Darren. They were currently staying at our house while looking for a place to call home. Having them here has been good. They provided a sense of family for Nile and helped him to focus on reconnecting with them in moments when he felt alone.