Chaos in the Canvas √

33 | dilemma

"No." Hemayal hiccuped and Mehmal sighed at the other end.

"See, this is what I'm talking about. You're in pain right now but what for? For something that's just a mere possibility at the moment? For something he might have nothing to do with? Hemayal, my love, you're ruining yourself." Mehmal's voice softened at the end, the gentle tone urging her to understand but when it came to Ibrahim Yazdani, every colour of emotion and bias painted her soul.

"So, I should pretend like nothing is wrong until everything's confirmed?" Hemayal asked, regaining a bit of sense and control over the dam that had been previously unleashed. 

"Maybe, if that helps you," Hemayal could feel Mehmal shrugging at the other end. "Or you could talk to him, clear everything up."

"No, thank you," Hemayal rolled her eyes, the headache intensifying. "I can already hear all the excuses he'll come up with."

"Excuses and explanations are two different things, Hami. I thought you could tell them apart." Mehmal said.

"When it comes to that man, you know I can't." Hemayal confessed and a heavy silence fell upon the line.

"So, what'll you do?" Mehmal probed and Hemayal finally opened her eyes - bloodshot and pained eyes - and fixed them on the wall ahead.

"Mehmal..." Hemayal whispered and Mehmal knew that moment that trouble had finally knocked their door.

"Hami...what are you thinking?" She asked.

"I'm going to execute my plan." Hemayal said, mind made and gaze determined.

"Hami..." Mehmal didn't know the right words - and even if she did, she knew the other woman wouldn't listen.

When it came to Ibrahim Yazdani, Hemayal Khakwani rarely ever listened to anyone else.

"You know, I think I've been going soft on him. After my breakdown the other night, I actually thought that if all of this planning and hatred is worth destroying my peace of mind over. I actually thought of forgiving him. Deep, deep down. Can you believe that?" Hemayal's voice wasn't hard, it was soft and gentle but the demons that resided there made a shiver slither up Mehmal's spine.

"Yes, I can. You love him." Mehmal's voice was terrorized - only because she knew her cousin, knew the devils that slept in her mind.

"Is love a good enough reason to forgive someone, Mehmal?" Hemayal asked, brows creased. 

"Love, I don't know, but one's own peace is a very good reason to forgive someone." Mehmal replied and Hemayal chuckled, a sad and hollow laugh that filled her eyes with water.

"You once said that I should never forgive him for what he did." Hemayal said, eyes still fixed far ahead at a point that had lost its meaning by now.

"That was before I saw what this revenge was doing to you. Forget everything, Hami. Dadu's dead but you're still alive, he's still alive - have some mercy on the two of you." Mehmal said and a small laugh filled her eyes again.

"Forget everything, you say," Hemayal scoffed - half laugh, half sob. "How would I ever look at myself in the eye again if I don't make him pay for taking Dadu away from me? You don't understand, Mehmal. I can't forgive him, even if I want to." 

"So you're going to execute your plan, now? Just because you think he killed a man?" Mehmal asked, voice hard.

"I don't know if he did it or not, the killing. And you're right, I can't accuse him of murder without any proof. You're right." Hemayal said, mind racing and aching at the same time.