No Homo

Pre-Chapter Notes: This is from Tricia's POV because why the hell not. Honestly, all of No Homo is just me being moody, throwing it on a computer, and calling it art.

Friday, August 26th, 6:09am

Tricia's POV

We started the call each morning. The younger siblings and I. It was between Ike, Karen, and I. Sometimes Firkle would join. But the call was mostly just us complaining. Sometimes Kyle would walk in and be confused, or Kevin or Kenny would join in and talk with Karen, or Craig would yell at me to shut up.

"I am so fucking pissed right now you guys," I complained.
"Why?" Karen asked. Her voice was sweet and soft as always. There was a faint sound of carrots being chopped in the background.
"Because I'm hungry."
"Then eat," Ike sighed.
"But I have to take out my retainer and my case is in the bathroom, and my brother is showering, so the dumbass is keeping me from food."
"Doesn't he make your food?" Kevin chimed in.
"Yeah, but he should hurry up. I'm hungry. Also, why are you guys cutting carrots? Don't you have pop tarts or something?"
"I prefer frozen waffles to pop tarts, but we went to the food bank yesterday so we have to cut out the rotting parts then eat the vegetables before they're completely covered in mold," he explained as another carrot was chopped.
"Oh. Ew," I shuddered in disgust. "Oh my brother got out of the shower."

I walked over to the bathroom, phone still in hand, and I removed my retainer while my brother walked in.

"Hey Tricia, just doing some stuff in the bathroom. I want to put in my headphones, but I don't want to get them wet," Craig explained.
"Oh cool. I'm hungry so I'm taking out my retainer," I eyed him, seeing if he'd understand why I was so annoyed.
"Oh, nice," he smiled and left.

"Oh, nice," I mimicked mockingly.
"Hey, at least your brother cares enough to make you breakfast. Kyle doesn't understand me at all," Ike audibly rolled his eyes.
"What was that?" I heard Kyle from the other end of the phone.
"Dad says you're a pussy."
"That's not very nice, Ike. You know what mom says about no-no words-"
"Shove it, pussy!"
I heard Kyle gasp, "Ike, say that again and I'm kicking the mother fucking baby."
"MOM!" Ike yelled. I'm pretty sure he went on mute after that.

I went downstairs to grab food when I saw it was still being made.

"Craig. I said I was hungry."
"I know, but I was in the shower, and because I'm rushing you'll just have to deal with box mix waffles."
"I hate box mix waffles!"
"Then why don't you learn to cook for yourself?"
"Shut up, Craig!" I yelled. Kevin, Kenny, and Karen joined in on my scream. They know me too well.

Friday, August 26th, 11:30am

I had grabbed my food and sat next to Karen, Firkle and Ike were across from us. We talked about things that wouldn't matter to anyone but us. 

"I thought Kevin left for college, what was he doing at your house?" Ike asked, while eating the food Sheila made for him.
"Oh, he did. He just comes back and visits a lot. We miss him, y'know?" she smiled. 
"I get that," I nodded. I guess I would miss Craig when he left for college. I could turn his room into a shrine for Danny Devito or some shit like that though.
"You guys are a bunch of fucking conformists," Firkle scoffed and stood up. "I'm going to hang out with the only people who understand me."
"Kay, have fun!" Karen smiled.

Firkle glared at her, then left.

Friday, August 26th, 5:30pm

I was walking around my house when I got a call from an unknown number. Since I was an idiot, I of course automatically answered. 

"Hello?" I asked to the stranger on the other end.
"Hey, this is Tweek. Is Craig home?" the stranger responded.
"Tweek... Craig's spiky boyfriend? The one that's two good for him?"
"Um, not his boyfriend, but thank you. And is he home?"
"Yeah."
"Can you tell him to pick up his phone?"
"Oh sure," I held my phone down and yelled at my brother who was napping on the couch.

"Craig. Craig. Craig. Craig. Craig! Craig! Craig, awaken!" I yelled.
"Hm... what?" Craig woke up.
"Tweek wants to call you."
"Oh... okay."

I lifted my phone to my ear, "He'll call." I then hung up.

Craig picked up his phone and walked to his room. Me, being the genius I am, followed him. I sat outside his locked door with my ear pressed up against the wood. I could make out a couple things Craig said.

"Hey"
"No, it's all good."
"Definitely."
"...as if."
"Stupid stuff like..."
"Well, give me an answer."
"Purple," then he laughed.
"...seriously?"
"Of course. No, I understand."

His voice was getting increasingly louder, which meant he was nearing the door. I shot upward and ran back to my room and slammed my own door shut.

"Does eight work instead?" I heard him outside.
"Great, glad it's settled. But seriously, what color are they?"
He laughed, "Fine fine, I'll drop it. And Tricia, stop listening to my phone call."

I gasped and fell backward, he opened the door.

"Oh how the mighty hath fallen," he smirked then reached his hand out for me to take it.
"You suck," I grabbed Craig's hand and he pulled me up.
"I'm making dinner, what do you want?"
"Chicken."
"Coming right up, princess."

Notes: These past two chapters have been quite short, maybe the next chapter will be longer. What Craig and Tweek were talking about will be revealed later, but in more important news: I finally figured out how Tyde is going to happen so looking forward to that. It, of course, is going to include strange references and jokes including the movie Tall Girl.