In a Heartbeat (MxM)

Chapter 35

"Are you waiting for an invitation?" I mocked, before climbing into the sheets.

Almost expecting him to hightail it back to the couch, I was mildly shocked that he hesitantly got in the bed, nearly hanging his entire body off the edge.

We laid there in silence, the awkwardness becoming thicker than the comforter itself. I couldn't deal with it, so I sat straight up, grabbing for a pillow from the couch.

"I almost forgot," I told him, placing the pillow between us before glancing his way, a look of shock and confusion on his face.

And then he let out a short, but a quite audible laugh. One tainted with a bit of nerves but amusement still clearly there. It was the first time I had seen him actually, almost-smile since he'd been here, which actually felt relieving. He stifled another chuckle before replying, "I'm not going to jump you."

It was so out of character, so unexpected that I let out a quiet laugh, totally caught off guard by his remark. I shook my head before removing the pillow, replying, "Ya, that's stupid."

With the heavy blanket of awkwardness gone, Simon was dozing off, just nearly asleep judging from his breathing, but I couldn't sleep. Today's events kept replaying, the way Simon was trying to connect with my wolf and the bond, the look on his face, it was a lot to process. It didn't help that he was such an enigma with his emotions being all over the place.

And if everyone wanted me to try and understand the guy, where was I even supposed to start?

I hardly knew him before he left, and sixteen years is a long time to change a person. The people closest to him, who know him best all hate me, so it's not like I could just ask them either.

I don't know how long I spent just laying there, thinking, and overthinking everything. I even tried to replay the short memories I had of him from when he was here before he told me we were mates. But I couldn't think of any, all I could remember was bits and pieces of when I kicked him out, and even then, it was all a bit hazy.

So I shook my head, deciding to just try and sleep, knowing well that tomorrow morning would be even more awkward. Out of habit, I turned on my right side, facing toward Simon. I had slept on my right side ever since I lived with Sarah, but now facing him was a weird sight. Here he was, completely vulnerable, next to someone he probably never thought he'd be near.

His back was facing me, so I guess it was better than having him wake suddenly to see my face just a mere couple of feet away, but it was still a weird sight and situation to see. I probably should have turned back around, but instead, I just stared. Maybe it was because I've never been this close to him for such an extended period, but I could make out his features better here in the dark than I could during the day. He was just as thin as Sarah, if not, even more, even his neck seemed so delicately thin. Through his shirt, I could make out parts of his spine that stuck out, his waist dipping so low into the mattress it was kind of unnerving.

But something stuck out the most. His shirt rode up, exposing part of his back and torso. But it wasn't his pale skin, or how skinny he was. It was the scars along his back, most looked like scratch marks, maybe even a few stretch marks. But some were obviously deeper like a rogue had gotten a good chunk of skin. One looked like a surgery scar, raised, and placed right above his hip. There were so many of them, that they often overlapped, crisscrossed, new, old, some seemed really fresh.

But there was one I was most concerned about. A deep one, not more than three inches long, but it was raised and far different from the others. Most seemed to heal perfectly fine, a faint pink line, some so faint, it was hard to make out, but this one was brutal. It looked like it had been infected for a while, not properly healed or anything. And with how bad it looked, it only reminded me of Xavier's scar. Even though this looked like some rogue had slashed him in the back, the intensity of it was nothing short of shocking.