(warning: depression and attempt of suicide)
(Y/N) pov
After we all got in the car we, quickly headed straight to the hospital. I sat in the back with Kakyoin and Avdol, looking out for them. I managed to stop the bleeding from them but they need to see a doctor. Those slashes could actually leave some scar's.
Why does this have to happen because of me? Because Dio wants my power so much? I'm just a dirty street rat. A street rat that learned how to love these men before her, just over a couple of weeks. It wasn't fair how they were paying the price for it, just for being with me, trying to protect so I can have my freedom from...him.
Seeing how Kakyoin and Avdol got easily defeated by N'Doul, how they could've almost died. How those two Speedwagon Foundation workers were just doing there jobs but in the end got brutally murdered in front of my eyes. It was so disgusting and disturbing. I know I respected N'Doul, he must felt like no one understand him, have people pity him or looking down on him because he was blind. I know how he feels but for someone like me watching those innocent men die who could've had a loving family die in the most gruesome way... My brain couldn't handle so much my entire body was frozen.
I looked at the small window to see that it's alright night. I turn my attention back to the two men. I took both of there hands and squeezed it with my fingers interlock with theirs. I whispered ever so softly to myself.
(Y/N)-"Please... don't leave me alone again..."
Just seeing how we're fighting for our life's, basically everyday. Had made me learn how to appreciate the ones, who I cared little about in our first encounter could still love me and treat me with such kindness and open arms. It pains me how they're trying their absolute hardest just to save me and Mrs. Holly. How much blood i see when I'm healing them. How everyone is targeting me just because I'm supposed to be Dio's property aka " future wife".
They didn't have to help me, Avdol could have just let me burn to my death back in Hong Kong. Fucking assholes, now look at what have you guys done to me. You guy's made me feel i I feel so unless how I didn't give them the right help. I have the powers to heal the both of them. And yet I didn't get hurt at all... It's all me... They got injured because of ME.
My little whisper didn't go unnoticed by Iggy. He sense my frustration, anger, and sorrow which was bumming him out that I was in the back weeping over my friends. Jotaro and OM were sleeping while Polnareff was still driving. Iggy sigh to himself and got in the back with me. He went to my lap and curled himself into a ball.
(Y/N)-"Iggy. What ar-"
Iggy-'Just shut it kid. This is the most comfortable seat on this damn car so let me enjoy it.'
I widden my eyes a little over what he said. I felt my guilt sort of calming down. I let go of there hands and put one on Iggy's back while my other was slowly petting him. I am still kinda mad at Iggy over what he did today although I would be lying if I said he's fur wasn't soft.
After awhile of petting him, I felt my eyes getting shutting down on me. I'm trying to keep myself awake so i help Avdol and Kakyoin to the hospital. I need to see them before they get taken away. I wanna...I wanna...see...them...and say...I love... them.
...
...
...
Zzzz.....
....
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I heard mumbling around me. The sound of the seats being pulled down then I felt someone slowly lifting up my body. As the person was trying to carry me into their arms the sound the Iggy's barking woke me up and I punched the person in the face.
Much to my surprised it was Polnareff...
(Y/N)-"Oh sorry Polnareff... You got a little something running down your nose."
Polnareff-"What the fuck! I told you Jotaro should've done this instead! God- that hurts!"
(Y/N)-"Hey, I said I was sorry quite being a baby and let me look at your face."
Joseph-"Hey Polnareff quite your whining we're at the hospital. Now Jotaro you take Kakyoin while I take Avdol."
Jotaro-"tsk."
I feel my heart dropped. Of course I want them to get better but what if it's so bad we won't see them again for the whole trip? What if Kakyoin condition is so severe that he won't see me again? What if-
Joseph-"(Y/N)? Are you all right hon?"
(Y/N)-"Uh....yeah. I'm just sleepy that's all, old man."
Joseph-"Ok dear, let's go and take iggy close to you. I don't want him running off or farting on other people. Also I see that he's taken alike to you. Now he won't be to much of a hassle for all of us."
(Y/N)-"Yep. Now let's just get this over with."
We walked inside of the hospital. The old man went up to the desk and told the lady that Kakyoin and Avdol we're injured. When she took noticed of them she screamed and yelling out they need to be taken to the emergency room.
Fear and panic were rising inside of me. I knew their current state is bad but damn is it worse then I thought? She screamed and a bouch of doctors and nurses came to us with two rolling tables. They took the both of them and to the emergency room. I ran behind them so I could be with them but Jotaro held me back. Tears of guilt and sorrow left my eyes.
(Y/N)-"Wait! No! Please don't take them away from me! What the fuck are you going to do to them?! Ahhhhhh!"
Polnareff-"(Y/N)! Stop it this is a hospital!"
Joseph-"Jotaro take her outside!"
I didn't care if people around me were looking at me weirdly. I didn't need them to feel pity for me. I just want to be with them. Jotaro put his hand on my mouth to get me to shut up. I was struggling to get out of his hold on me. I can't calm down. Why? Just why couldn't it have been me instead of them?!
Jotaro-"(Y/N), quite it your drawing attention!"
(Y/N)-"No I wanna see them!"
Then soon came Polnareff and Joseph.
Joseph-"shh, shh, shh, (Y/N) it's ok. I talked with the doctors and they said we can come first thing in the morning to see Kakyoin and Avdol. Now don't you wanna see them?"
He asked me in a soft voice. I stop struggling and looked at him with my glossy eyes. I slowly nodded my head and Jotaro put me down.
Polnareff-"All of us had a hard day. Why don't we get something to eat then hit the hay. I'm starving."
Joseph-"Great idea. Come on sweety so let's go."
OM picked me up and put me around his neck. I wasn't in the mood to eat anything so I stayed quiet. Honestly, I wanted to lay in bed all night.
We found a hotel that allowed dogs and they even had dinning inside. I was really out of it and let Polnareff picked my food for me. The guys were talking to each other of what should we do next. How we should go shopping for supplies today since all of ours were trashed from our last battle. Then came in our food.
I wasn't really hungry so I barely ate much. But Jotaro was forcing me to eat because he knew I didn't eat anything today except for some eggs I had for breakfast. Once he was satisfied he stopped.
Polnareff-"(Y/N). Are you alright? You know you can always talk to us about what you're feeling."
They were all looking at me. I didn't want to met their gaze. I just want to be inside my room and cry myself to sleep. I was growing more frustrated with myself. I can't take this anymore. Maybe things would be a lot more better if I just didn't exist in the first place!
(Y/N)-"You know what...? Leave me the fuck alone for tonight! I have enough on my plate for today ok? So quite nothing me!"
I walked out of the dinner room. People were just looking at me and talking amongst themselves.
(Y/N)-"What the fuck all of you are looking at? Mind your business."
I threaten them in the most deadliest tone. I quickly looked away from me and ate their food in silence.
Polnareff-"(Y/N)! Wait!"
Jotaro-"(N/N)! Hold it!"
Joseph-"Stop you two!"
Polnareff and Jotaro turn back to Mr. Joestar.
Joseph-"Leave her be for the time being. She been through enough today with the two Speedwagon Foundation member having traumatizing death, having both Kakyoin and Avdol severely injured, on too of having to defeat the enemy Stand and as well as having a breakdown in the hospital. I'll talk to her later. But for now we should all get some sleep."
The two reluctantly agreed, unsure if it was the best decision, but in the end they exited the dinner room. Leaving for there room without a word.
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As soon as I got to my room I slammed the door and locked it. I ran to my bed and grabbed Maríe and sob into him. I'm so sorry Kakyoin and Avdol that I couldn't help you. I'm sorry I couldn't do anything or acted quicker to save you.
Fuck you Dio! This is all your fault! Why can't you just leave us alone? Why is revenge so important to you? Does watching us struggle and wanting so bad for us to get defeated amusing to you? Do you just enjoy watching us suffer from afar while you're in your little hiding hole? Do you just want me to suffer emotionally, physically and mentally, to point your breaking me? Do you just want me this bad?
Would thing's go better if I just end myself tonight?
So you won't have a hold on me anymore. For you not to have such an obsession over me. So I don't have to feel like I'm constantly having to take the responsibility for being an somewhat connecting to you. Damn you...
Your one of the biggest reason why I can't myself everyday, there are no words to describe how much I despise you, how much I want you to feel the pain I feel. I can't take all this pressure and stress everyday having the constant fear of one them dieing in front of me.
I can't take it anymore!
Maybe things would be better without me here.
Suddenly I feel someone wet on my cheek. I look to my right to see Iggy licking my running cheek. He snuggles close to me.
(Y/N)-"How did you get *sniff* in here, Iggy? I locked the open."
Iggy-'You didn't notice I was following you the whole time? Hey listen kid I know it's hard to have some in their current state. But just know it's not forever so don't worry about it. I'm sure those two will be up and running in no time.'
(Y/N)-"Thanks Iggy.... I just feel so overwhelmed everything right now. I think I'm going to bed. I need it after today."
Iggy-'Alright. Move it, kid. It's cold so I wanna get under the sheets too.'
(Y/N)-"ok."
I moved back just like he wanted. And we soon drifted to sleep or so Iggy though. I just closed my eyes. Not really falling asleep but I kept thinking about how much of torment I been through. It must be at least midnight.
Through this whole trip I realized I been bottling up so much agony. From the very first day when I first met Dio. How he controlled my body for his own will to murder others. How the enemy Stand users are meaning to hurt me as well as bring me back to him.
I feel myself getting up.
"Maybe I should end this all" What have I done to deserve any of this. I mean I'm grateful for meeting Jotaro and the others but going along with them will only bring them more danger.
I got out of bed, then made my made to the door.
Maybe me being gone won't be a difference because they enemy Stands would just be coming at them because their trying to save Mrs. Holly. But I can be free from Dio haunting me.
I went down the hall to the roof.
As they say the other side is a way better world then this one. Then I won't have to worry about being hurt again. I won't have to feel pain again.
I walk up the stairs.
I know Jotaro and the other would miss me but I can't deal with this anymore. There just so much weight on me. I don't wanna bother the others because they have enough to deal with so I don't want to add more to them.
And before I knew I was standing on the edge of the roof of this hotel.
Unknown-"(Y/N)..."
??
Unknown-"(Y/N)...."
(Y/N)-"Who's that?"
Dad-"Who the hell do you think it is? Jesus Christ, (Y/N) you are just the most idiotic and unless person I ever met! Honestly a rat has a higher IQ then you, you stupid bitch! Just fall already so those assholes won't have to see your disgusting face anymore! I will be more then glad if you weren't here anymore! You little trader!"
Mom-"Your father is right (Y/N). If we didn't wanted you then I'm sure a couple of strangers don't want to deal with you either. You already cause enough damage with me and your father. Exploding the house up in flames like that how dare you."
As she lit her cigarette.
Jump uh?
Maybe things would be better off this way...
Without me here...
No more pressure...
No more stress...
No more pain...
No more broken heart...
Next thing I knew I took my first step.
This is it...
Where I can finally die and end my miserable life. Take that Dio...come get me now bitch.
I closed my eyes. Feeling the wing blowing my hair. The tears I kept inside pouring out. This little street rat just jumped and is going to be fre-
"Hermit Purple!!!"
Suddenly I felt a hand grab mine. I open my eyes to see the ground a couple of feet away from me. I look up to see Morning Spring grabbing onto purple vines. I trilled the vines up to see the old man , clenching his teeth and tears streaming down his face. With all his strength in one fell swoop he pulled me all the way to the top.
I held me close to his chest in a tight grip.
Joseph-"What the hell are you thinking?! What were you hoping to gain from this?! Why were you feeling this way without telling any of us?!"
I held him close to a loud sobs came out my mouth. Out of all of them he was the least I wanted to see catch me like this. Then see Iggy right next to him yelling at me
(Y/N)-"I....I c-can't deal...w-w-with being slave any-m-more!... I don't want all these Stand user coming after us anymore! I want all of this to end! I'm so unlucky that I kept harming everyone or killing them! I....I... I.... I just want to live a normal life with everyone in it!!!"
Joseph-"I'm sorry... I couldn't sense your pain. I remember...I use to be like you..."
(Y/N)-"What do you mean, old man?"
Joseph-"I use to think about killing myself too. I know I'll be sounding like an old man when I'm saying this but back when I was young, remember my best friend Caesar?"
(Y/N)-"Yeah... You told me about him and how he died..."
Joseph-"Yes, well... After his death really hit me hard. I tried to cover up my sadness with my usual goofy personality....but deep down inside...I never met anyone like him. Sure we clashed heads, thought he was still someone I truly called a friend. When I saw how he died it felt like the piece of the roof fell on my heart. How he gave all his last Hamon to me so I can defeat the pillar men. And after all was said and done I couldn't shake off Caesar death. I wish I could've apologize to him for everything if I knew he was gonna die!"
More of his tears kept falling on my head. I listened very carefully to what he was saying to me.
Joseph-"After everything was done, after I was rescued I fell into a deep depression. When I finally got to a hospital in Italy was about to do the same thing you did. But felt myself stop. Its hard to explain but...I felt like Caesar was there telling me to stop. I swear, I could hear him in my ear saying "jojo...you shouldn't end your life just because I not here anymore...I didn't risk my finale moments on his earth for you to end it too. I may not be here to you see enjoy the rest of your life but I'll be watching from afar. I'll always be by your side even in death. Now, live your life for the both of us... You stupido idiota."
I hold him tighter. I realized what I just done. Hearing his story made me feel stupid about myself that I was giving up the only good people in my life.
Joseph-"I never cried so hard in my entire life! But after seeing you jump... I saw the same young men I was! So (Y/N) please don't end your life because without you.... I feel like I'm losing him all over again! You may not know but you mean the world to me! I feel like you are another daughter to me and if you die then... What the hell I'm a good for even I can't even protect you!"
(Y/N)-"Nooooooo! Don't say that! I'm sorry! I promise I won't do something like this again! I love you! I love you all! Please don't ever leave me!"
Joseph-"I promise sweetie! I promise!"
I never felt so close to someone besides Jotaro and Polnareff before. I see a lighter that lit up in my life. I hug him for a bit longer and when I looked behind him I could swear I saw another man with blond hair with weird clothes looking at us with a sad yet happy smile.
He mouthed the words "Please take care of JoJo for me" I didn't know who he was but I nod my head. Then when I blinked he was gone. Weird.
(Y/N)-"Hey grandpa. How did you know I was up here?"
He was shocked when I said the words "Grandpa". Then shocked then to happiness that I saw him as family.
Joseph-"I got up in the middle of the night to come talk to you but I saw Iggy running down the hall to me to show that you weren't there. So he sniffed out for you and ended up here."
I looked Iggy who was also crying.
(Y/N)-"Thank you Iggy."
I let go OM and gave Iggy a hug. He licked my face a bunch of time.
Joseph-"Come on, it's late. Let's go to bed dear."
(Y/N)-"*yawns* ok grandpa. Now that you mentioned it I am pretty tired."
He pick me up and we start heading back to my room. When we got there he put me in my bed with Maríes and Iggy snuggling next to me. He kissed my head and said goodnight but before he said "I love you" and to tell him if I needed anything.
Joseph-"Protect her Iggy with your life. Or else I'm cooking you into Chinese food."
Then left. I laughed but shut my eyes. I felt so happy when any of them say I love you to me. It makes me feel like I'm wanted.
(Y/N)-"Don't worry Caesar I kept grandpa safe and keep him out of trouble for you. And maybe when older I come and visit you in Italy one day... "
I fell asleep.
A ghost came into the room looking down at the girl and dog. He saw that a piece of her hair was in her face so he moved it out. Then kissed her forehead. "(Y/N) was I think you're name. You are a beautiful young lady and I see your grow to be an even more beautiful woman with a heart as beautiful as a flower. Never change. And protect the ones you care for. And you better make sure you keep that damn JoJo out of trouble. But I'll be looking forward to meeting you one day. Goodbye for now il mio piccolo fiore." then the blond spirit left....
To be continued...