A small and nervous laugh emitted from the Professor, his smile faltering as he placed his hands into his pockets. "And what, exactly, is it that you think you know?" Lupin spoke with confidence, but his body language portrayed alternate feelings.
Deep breath. "You're a werewolf and my Godfather. Is it true?" My eyes found his, that were now entirely succumbed to horror and disbelief. His lips parted to speak, but no words emitted from him. I could see his internal debate was evident, as a swarm of emotions overcame him. Finally, he spoke.
"Yes...It's true." He sighed, averting his gaze to the ground. "Who told you?"
"Professor Snape." I gulped, causing him to shake his head and scoff in retaliation. "That Sniv-" Remus paused momentarily, "...Snape doesn't know how to keep his bloody mouth shut, does he?"
Dismissively, I shook my head, "I'd like to think I would have figured out the werewolf part myself, eventually." Complimenting myself, the teacher chuckled at my words as he folded his arms. "So, you are like James. What have I let myself in for?" He spoke to himself, causing my eyebrows to furrow in confusion.
"I am?" Lupin nodded at my questioning, humming in confirmation. "That's funny. No-one ever talks about my dad." I scoffed, grabbing my backpack from my desk. A smile made it's way across the man's lips, "Hm. That was your father's, by the way." He reminisced.
Glancing at the backpack in disbelief for a moment, I found an irrevocable grin spreading across my lips. "I've had it for as long as I can remember." I spoke, realizing that I had been carrying a piece of my dad with me all along. A comforting silence made its way across the room, as we both trailed our eyes onto the backpack.
"I wish I knew them." I sighed solemnly. Remus Lupin nodded, "I know...So do I. But, you must know that they loved you and your brother so much." He reassured. I pursed my lips, my eyes meeting his once more. "I understand why you couldn't take care of me."
The Professor let out an almost sigh of relief, "If I could have, I would have had you in a heartbeat. But, it was just too dangerous." He tried to explain, although I did not need one, for I had already came to understand in the days spent alone in my dormitory.
"I know. And, I won't tell anyone. I promise." Lupin nodded, happy with my statement. "Thank you, Emerald."
Sending a curt nod in return, I slung my backpack over my shoulder, "In return for my secret-keeping, maybe you could tell me more about my parents some time?" I negotiated. He chuckled, shaking his head once more, "That would be nice." He answered simply, before I waved him 'Goodbye' and made my way towards The Great Hall for dinner...
***
The weeks passed quickly, and I had refused Snape's summoning to any further training classes over the weekends. I had spent my evenings mostly researching into werewolves, so that I could gather a better understanding of Lupin's condition. Fortunately, we would also start learning about them in the next term, so it was always good to get a little ahead.
I had also managed to have a word with Professor McGonagall, and Lupin would be teaching Harry defensive spells, especially after the Boggart/Dementor occurrence in our first DADA class. I had asked if I could learn with Lupin also, but McGonagall refused, advising me I would need to take it up with Snape if I wanted to change. I decided not to, of course.
The guilt of my ignorance to Snape began to eat away at me. I realised that I would need to start attending the training again if I wanted to be able to successfully defend myself and Harry. So on Saturday 2nd October, I dressed and styled my hair, grabbed my backpack and wand and made my way to the seventh floor.
The entrance to the Room of Requirement opened, as I found myself stepping inside. Only it was empty, as I had expected due to my lack of attendance in the previous weeks. I waited for five minutes, before the door in the room opened and the familiar, cloaked figure stepped inside. Snape stopped abruptly in his path as he noticed me standing in the centre of the room.
"You came?" His monotonous voice spoke in disbelief.
I nodded, "I did. So, where do we start?" I noticed he was holding a small pile of books across his chest. My bluntness startled him for a moment. Severus shook himself back into reality, before handing me the pile of books. "You'll need to take a look at these before our next session." Accepting the books, I put them into my backpack before making my way to the centre of the room, once more.
"Emerald...Can we talk about what hap-" He began, causing me to shake my head, immediately cutting his sentence short. "-I don't want to talk about it.
"Well, I do!" He protested, raising his voice a little too loud for my own comfort. I scoffed, my angered eyes meeting his, "What is there to discuss!? You. Lied to me. End of story." I pointed my index finger at him, the rage bubbling inside of me with each word. Snape's quilt-ridden eyes found my own. They felt almost foreign to me, for I had not seen them in so many weeks. So hurt. So...hollow. The man looked exhausted and utterly drained; almost a shadow of the Professor I had left in the Room of Requirement that day.
"What can I do that will help you to forgive me?" His voice was desperate. I felt I could have cried at his vulnerability and forgave him there and then; I held my head strong, nonetheless, forcing my own guilt to the very pit of my stomach. "I need some time."
Snape's gaze was now the one to avert from my own and I watched as his eyes trailed along the floor solemnly. "I'm sorry, Severus." The man shook his head at my apology, "You have nothing to be sorry for. I am sorry, I should have told you the truth."
I nodded, a small chuckle escaping my lips. "Yes, you should have. But what's done is done." Clasping my hands in eagerness to divert the subject, I spoke with haste, "Now, what are you going to teach me today?"
Snape inhaled deeply, retreating back to his usual, monotonous gaze that hid his underlying emotions so efficiently. "The Patronus charm, Miss Potter. It is a spell used to deflect Dementor attacks. I feel this, particular charm may be of use to you, what with the previous attack on the train."
I nodded, a smile making its way across my lips. "Indeed."
The Professor removed his black cloak, tossing it to the side of the room and removing his wand from his sleeve. Yet the sense of this wand had an intangible familiarity to me that I couldn't quite put my finger on. I had seen it a dozen times, previously. What made this time so different?
"You must speak the incantation 'Expecto Patronum'. When doing so, picture the happiest memory you can think of in your mind." He cleared his throat, pointing his wand out in front of him.
"Expecto Patronum." The words came from his mouth comparable to soft velvet, as a white light emitted from his wand and illuminated the entire room. It was brighter than any firelight...Any other spell I could think of. And it made my heart warm, the feeling of safety overwhelming me in my place. The light shining over us both then began to take form of a four-legged animal. A beautiful, white doe. I watched in complete awe as the majestic creature sauntered in the air above us with elegance and grace. I knew corporeal patronus' were unique to the caster; I couldn't help but wonder what mine would be...
My eyes caught onto Snape's as he fixated on the animal with a glimmer in his eyes I had failed to notice before. The life began to return to his cheeks; he appeared happy for a moment.
'Lily.'
His thoughts echoed through my mind; he lad let a wall down. I concentrated hard, trying to open his mind to me in that brief moment of weakness, no matter how much my heart nagged that my intrusion was wrong...
Images flashed through my mind; a meadow on a summer's day; blanketed with countless daisies, and hyacinths, creating a perfect landscape of greens, whites, purples and pinks. Two figures laid strewn amongst the flowers in the distance. I recognized them immediately, for even as a teenager Snape had his long, black hair, lean physique and pale face. The woman he laid with looked like a slightly older version of myself; possibly fifteen...My mother.
"Oh! I could stay here forever, Severus!" She sighed, looking in at the sky as she pointed excitedly at one of the clouds. "That one looks like a unicorn!" The auburn-haired young lady squealed, causing Severus to chuckle; his voice breaking in his teenage years. "Then why don't we?" Snape muttered, rolling over on his side as my mother rested her head on his cloak, turning to meet his eyes. "Let's stay here and not go back to Hogwarts." He suggested in an almost pleading manner.
Lily scoffed, shaking her head, "Are you mad!? We've got our exams next year, Sev. We have to go back." She protested, getting up from the floor as Snape followed in suit. She handed him his jacket she had been using as a pillow, "I best be getting back. Dinner's going to be ready soon."
Severus scoffed once again, "Very well. I suppose I'll see you in the new year, then." Bowing before her, she let out a small giggle and pulled him into the tightest hug. "See you soon, Sev."
Suddenly, the image faded as I found myself back in the room of requirement. Snape's Patronus had disappeared entirely, leaving us in almost darkness. My eyes found his, filled with fury. "I'm sorry." I muttered sheepishly, causing him to shake his head in dismissal, closing the gap between us with rage in his eyes, "That. Was. Private."
I took a few steps away from him, retreating a little under his influence. "You told me to let them in!"
Snape nodded angrily, "Yes! Let them in, not try to infiltrate other people's minds!" His footsteps distanced themselves from me once more, as he picked his cloak up in the corner of the room. "But, why haven't I been able to do that before?" I questioned confusedly.
Severus stormed angrily towards the door to the room, "Because I didn't let you, Potter!" His wand whisked in front of him, forcing the door to open. He paused in the hallway, hesitant for a moment as he turned back to face me. "I kept things from you and you broke through my thoughts. Now, we're even."