“…up. But, he will be alright. He just needs to heal.”
“And what of Fae? Its been a week, and she still hasn’t woken up.”
“Now that, I’m unsure.”
The voices were quiet and familiar. Nissa and Azriel. They were okay. I tried to move, but my body wouldn’t allow it. I tried to force my eyes opened, but they remained closed.
What was happening?
“…of reasons.” Continued Nissa. “It could be that all the power she had unleashed strained her. Her body couldn’t take it. She hasn’t used her power much, so her body and mind were not prepared for it, especially at that capacity.”
“So, it’s a waiting game?”
“Yes. It’s unclear how long she may be like this.”
I could feel my mind pulling me back under, and I allowed it, welcoming the darkness once again.
***
I lay back on the soft grass in the middle of the woods, staring up at the light blue sky visible through the canopy of trees. My eyes lazily traced the shapes of the clouds as they drifted by.
Bunny.
Three-legged dog.
A tree.
Whale.
A small smile tugged at my lips when I saw the whale-shaped cloud. Inhaling deeply, I closed my eyes, letting the peaceful sounds of chirping birds wash over me. For once, my mind was quiet. These moments were rare—when everything in me calmed and I could just exist, without worry, without the noise.
But then, faint giggling shattered the stillness.
My eyes flew open, and I scrambled to my feet, quickly ducking behind a nearby tree. I peeked around it and froze.
A young couple was walking hand in hand, weaving through the woods as if they were the only ones in the world. They looked so... happy. The boy twirled the girl under his arm, her laughter ringing through the trees, light and carefree. My chest tightened with a pang of envy. They radiated a warmth I couldn’t help but long for. Then, with a playful grin, he scooped her up into his arms and carried her out of sight.
I leaned back against the tree, my heart heavy. Would I ever have that? Would anyone ever treasure me like that? Hold me close, the way he held her?
A memory surfaced—me, as a teenager, dancing alone in the rain, pretending I was twirling with the boy from my dreams.
My fingers brushed the bark of the tree as I closed my eyes, fighting the feeling of longing that crept into my chest. I hated how much I wanted it. Hated how seeing them made my heart ache with something so simple, yet so distant.
I inhaled deeply, letting out a shaky breath.
Would I ever fall in love, if I wasn’t an elf? Would there ever be a chance for me to have a child, to grow old with someone who loved me? To live a life that felt... whole?
I always tried to act fine around Jayce, pretending that it didn’t bother me, that I didn’t need anyone else. And in many ways, I was fine. We were fine. I loved him, and he was enough for the most part. But deep down, there was a part of me that longed for something more.
I wanted what they had.
And I hated that I wanted it.
***
My eyes opened to the soft patter of rain against the window. The steady rhythm was somehow both soothing and suffocating. I lay in a dark room, the only light coming from a lantern flickering in the corner. Its weak glow barely reached the edges of the small, wooden space, casting long shadows across the floor. Everything felt distant and heavy, as if I were stuck in a fog I couldn't break through.
I turned my head slowly, my body aching with every small movement. Everything hurt. It was a deep, throbbing pain in my bones, my muscles, my soul. My right hand trembled as I pulled it from under the covers, weakly tapping Azriel’s leg.
He jolted awake, his eyes quickly softening with sadness and concern. His left leg was wrapped in bandages, and a wooden staff leaned against his chair. He looked exhausted, his face drawn and pale. “Hey, kiddo,” he said softly, his voice a low rasp.
I opened my mouth, trying to speak, but no sound came out. My throat was raw, my voice lost somewhere in the pain. I tried again, but still nothing, just a broken squeak.
“Easy,” Azriel murmured, placing a warm hand on my forehead. His touch was gentle, comforting, but it couldn’t reach the storm inside me. “You strained your vocal cords pretty bad. Don’t push yourself. Just rest.” He stroked my hair softly, his smile sad and full of unspoken sorrow. “Nissa brought us here. We’re in the town of Alinar. We’re safe, though. No one knows who we are.”
Safe. The word felt meaningless, hollow.
“What happened?” I managed to whisper, my voice barely audible. It hurt to even ask.
Azriel sighed, his gaze distant as he searched for the right words. “We got away. You… you caused an earthquake, Fae. Fire too, and... whatever power you unleashed knocked the celestials out cold. But it took a toll.” I pointed weakly at his bandaged leg. “Yeah, a seraph got a few good hits in, but I’m alright. Nissa’s been a huge help. Kaius is fine too. His chaos… well, it did what chaos does.” He gave a half-hearted chuckle that quickly faded. “Ren got the worst of it, but he’s recovering. He’s stronger than he looks.”
I should’ve felt relief, but all I felt was dread. My heart pounded, knowing there was one name missing. I didn’t want to ask, didn’t want to know, but the question clawed at me, refusing to be silenced.
“Sorin?” His name came out as a whisper, my chest tightening as I said it. My heart already knew the answer, and yet I prayed I was wrong. But the ache inside me, the hollow space where our connection had been—it was all too real. Too empty.
Azriel’s face fell, and he lowered his head, avoiding my eyes. I saw the pain in him, saw the way his jaw clenched as he fought against his own emotions. “Fae…” he began, his voice cracking. “I’m so sorry. Sorin… he didn’t make it.”
The world collapsed in that moment. Everything inside me shattered, like glass breaking under unbearable pressure. The part of me that was fading, the part tethered to him—it was gone now. Ripped away.
“No.” My lip trembled as I tried to keep it together, but it was useless. I felt my chest tighten, the pain unbearable, like a knife twisting in my heart.
“I’m sorry,” Azriel whispered, his own tears falling. “I’m so sorry, Fae.”
My mind was spinning, my body shaking uncontrollably. This isn’t happening. It couldn’t be real. Sorin couldn’t be gone. He couldn’t be dead. He had promised. He had promised me.
A broken sob tore through me, and I tried to hold it back, tried to swallow the grief, but it was too much. My chest heaved as I struggled to breathe, the pain like fire in my lungs. “No,” I whimpered. “He… he promised…”
Azriel leaned closer, his hand gripping mine tightly. “Let it out, Fae. I’m here. Let it out.”
And I did. I broke.
I sobbed, the sound raw and anguished, tearing through my sore throat. My vocal cords screamed at me to stop, but I couldn’t. Everything inside me was unraveling, spilling out in waves of grief and anger and helplessness. None of this was fair. Sorin didn’t deserve to die. He didn’t deserve to be taken from me like this.
My anger flared, and I cursed the celestials, cursed the very ground they walked on. They had caused nothing but destruction, nothing but suffering. They had taken him from me. I wanted them to pay. I wanted to see them burn. I wanted to be their downfall, their reckoning. If the Elysians wouldn’t drag them to tophet, then I would become their valkyrie of death. I’d be the one to bring them down.
Another broken wail escaped me, my chest heaving with each breath. I had never felt anger like this before. It was wild, feral. Consuming.
Azriel never tried to stop me. He just held my hand, letting me scream, letting me feel the depth of my pain. My grief crashed over me like a storm, unrelenting, endless. Sorin was gone. The man I loved—the one I had been too scared to admit it to—was gone.
And I was alone in the wreckage.