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Alleviate |billie eilish|

By billies_my_bitch_

28.1K 465 65

alleviate; v: to make (suffering, deficiency, or a problem) less severe #1 Billiefanfic 1/19/23 More

1. School?
2. Her
3. "Hi ya there"
4. it's really her
5. "how"
6. "help"
7. "you work on cars?"
8. "do you like girls?"
9. "i can kiss you again right?"
10. "your lucky i still call you mom"
11. "stay away"
12. "rehab?"
13. "can i?"
14. Mazda miata
15. "promise you wont leave"
16. "you have it"
17. Vinegar
18. "Don't fucking leave me!"
19. Rosarita
20. Aurora
21. "this is yours?"
22. "you just ate dirt"
23. Kole
24.
25. Chip
26. "can we get a photo"
28. why?
29. Miss resilient
30. Ray
31.
32. No easy way to say this
33. "what's wrong"
34.

27. get out

410 6 8
By billies_my_bitch_

TW:
Alcohol
Suicide

max's pov--->

"Billie" my voice almost shaking. She turned her head to me disconnecting her and auroras make out session.

"Its no-" I cut billie off.

"both of you get out" my jaw clenched in anger and sadness.

"ma-" Billie tired again.

"OUT BOTH OF YOU. AURORA STAY OUT OF MY DAMN HOUSE" I scream at them. Aurora ran away like she did 6 years ago. Billie got up slowly trying to walk to me.

"max"

"Get out of my house billie" I down at her. I moved to the side with my door open. Her eyes glossed over, I really wanted to hug her, get anything for her not to cry but I didn't. I just stood there. Waiting.

She opened the front door.

"Billie" She turned around looking at me. "take this too" I pulled off the bunny ring and tossed it at her. I saw her heart shatter into pieces when I did that. She picked it up then left.

I sat on the new couch looking at the wall. I felt my eyes gloss over then tears poured out. With my sister?? Of anyone else, MY SISTER???? My tears came crashing down.

I don't have chip, he's probably with aurora. I don't want river at my house, she'll try to get me to fuck her. I have no one.

I swallow my sadness down grabbing my phone texting finneas.

Me
Hey fin can u bring me my skateboard outside when I get to ur moms

Fin boy
Sure ofc

Me
Thx :)

Glad he don't suspect shit yet. I grab my bag and begin walking. Then I start running, I got to their house in 10 minutes. When I walked up to the door I saw my board sitting on the porch. I grab it then start to head back to the road when the car I recognize so well pulls in.

I just look at the car emotionless. I get to the road then begin my journey to the drug store. I zip through traffic, using my hands to say if I'm turning so I don't get hit. Once I get there I shove my skateboard into my bag then walk in.

I look over the shelves. I grab some bandages for extra measures, and some simple living things. I get to the alcohol aisle looking at it all. I grab some bottles then take them up to the cashier.

"id" he sticks his hand out. I place it in his palm then he rings it up. "$61.28" I hand him cash then he gives me change. I put everything in my bag making me weigh a little more. Walking out I feel the cold breeze hit my face.

My hands glide over my board feeling the cravings on it then I place it on the ground. The click of when it hits the ground is just so, soothing. Worries go away, no sadness.

As I get home I notice a car in front of my house. I don't recognize it at all so I wait until it leaves. Sketchy shit. Unlocking the door I step in while the bottles clank together softly.

I set my bag on the kitchen counter pulling the bottles out. I shoved the 12 pack of beer in the fridge then grabbed the strong ass vodka I bought.

I take a swig sitting on the couch. I let my arm rest on the back of the couch while I man spread.

You were nothing to her. She just wanted your sister max. She didn't love you, everything was a lie. The speech she made at the Billboard? total fucking bullshit. She was just using you.

Those thoughts filled my head while I drank more. My phone buzzed in my pocket. I ignored it at first. It went off again and again. I take another swing while the burning sensation of when it went down disappeared.

Incoming call from: Finneas

"What" I kind of slurred.

"Max? Are you drunk?"

"hell yeah I am" I laugh at myself.

"For fuck sake, me and Claudia are coming over" I just laugh harder.

"No your not, let me destroy myself in peace" I finish the first bottle.

"You're not destroying yourself tonight max. You hear me?" His voice is angry and soft but I hear someone else in the backgroud.

I hang up on them walking to moms room. I look in her lock box finding stuff to smoke. I found a blunt then a lighter, lighting it up.

I lay on her bed just smoking everything away.

You are a bad girlfriend.

I continue to smoke when I hear a thud at the door. I don't move I just keep smoking away.

I heard shuffles around the house but still, didn't move. I watch the door open as I blow out the smoke.

"Max" I hear Claudia. I ignore her. I smoked the rest of it away, getting annoyed I grab another one. Claudia walks up to me snatching it out of my hands.

"claud don't be a ass. Let me waste away" I try to grab it but she backs away. Finneas walks in a small time later.

"your coming with us, if you like it or not" finneas said sternly. I laugh at him.

"lemme go take a piss first" I get up walking past them. I get to the bathroom looking through the cabinet. If I can't waste away I might as well end it. I find a razor under something. I look at myself in the mirror.

So many scares, so much pain, so much sadness. Can all go away with one. Little. Piece. Of. Metal.

I sit on the edge of the tub, lifting my arm to lay in my leg.

"Goodbye world. Hey mom" I tell myself then out the razor on my arm. I press down hard letting it go in deep. I hear a bang on the door. I just looked at it while my vision got a little blurry.

"tell billie, I still love her and thanks for everything" I yell at the door then go deeper.

Skin cuts like paper with a razor. Blood oozes out like water.

I almost pass out when the door finally opens and they run inside. That's the last thing I remember when I black out.

. . .

I wake up in the hospital, wrist covered in bandages, dried up blood. My old clothes at the end of the bed stained with blood.

"she's awake" I hear a male voice. I hear feet shuffle then hear doors open and close.

"I thought I would see mom" I mumbled. I felt the tear slip go down my cheek. I felt a hand on my face rubbing it away.

"billie?" I just look at her. She looks tired, energy drained, her eyes are puffy and red.

"Oh max" She began crying.

"Why are you crying? I thought you didn't care" My face is still emotionless. She just looks in my eyes speechless. Her eye brow twitches and she looks away.

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Double update for my babies 🥹🤗
only 7 chapters left...

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