"How come she didn't tell us you were Nicolas's girlfriend?" Carla asked me as we watched the sunset from the porch of our villa.
"It's not what I base my life around," I said before taking a bite of a vanilla pie Vittoria had ordered earlier. It wasn't overly sweet but I liked the scoop of ice cream beside it, which made it much better to enjoy.
"I know, but it's one of the more interesting pieces of information. And I'm talking more about Nicolas. He never likes any of the women he's with." I smiled as I took another bite. "Is he really as cold as he makes everyone believe?" I shook my head as I looked up from my plate and watched the glowing sun.
"He isn't. Just don't tell him I told you that," I glanced at her and saw a slight smile appear on her face. Serena was swimming in the pool with Verona while Vittoria was inside, talking on the phone to someone.
"Does he have any friends that are hot?" Serena asked, making me smile.
"None that aren't taken," Verona said before meeting my eyes. "Although Gio is free, right?" I shrugged, keeping my knowledge of his feelings to myself. "He's a good-looking guy but he isn't that fond of commitment."
I wondered if that was due to his attraction to Vittoria. Perhaps he genuinely experienced apprehension when it came to entering into a relationship. I could empathize with his situation, as I had once been in a similar position with Nicolas, just from a different perspective. However, deep down, I held onto the hope that he would eventually discover someone who brought him genuine happiness. If that person happened to be Vic, it would make me absolutely delighted.
"I just think I shouldn't bother with any mafia men. I mean if I had to, then I would choose Nicolas but he's married," Serena said as she swam on her back.
I smiled as I remembered the way I pulled Nicolas into the pool. It made me happy to know I could experience these innocent moments with him even if things were different between us.
"The real question is if he would even entertain the idea," Verona said, glancing at me as Serena looked at her with her brows pinched together. "He's never been in love apart from once and after they ended, he lost himself. I doubt he'll want anyone that is not her," I felt something warm hit my chest.
"Who? Brielle?" She looked my way. "What did you do to capture his attention so much?" I shrugged as I took another bite of my pie. "Come on, how did you meet him? It's not like you met him through some dating app."
"I did not. We met at a club once," I said, skipping most of the details. It wasn't that I didn't trust the girls around me but rather that Serena seemed far too immersed in my personal life that it became slightly concerning. Every lunch we had together, she managed to bring up Nicolas. Even if it didn't correlate with me straightforwardly, she didn't hold back her admiration for my man.
I guess it wasn't very ideal to hear someone lusting over the man I loved and was involved with right in front of me.
"That's it?" She seemed surprised.
"I don't see how any of the details are any of your business," I responded, catching her off guard and making Verona, as well as Clara, widen their eyes. "I'm not trying to be mean but I don't think that any of those details are relevant."
"I just find it weird how after so many years the man falls for a random chick he found in a club," I tried my best to not take her words to heart.
"Are you jealous?" She rested her chin on her arms which she placed on the pool's edge.
"And what if I am? If a random girl like you can catch his attention, why can't I be hopeful?" I frowned and was about to bite back but she continued, even doing so much as pointing a finger at me. "How are you so special? Just because you're from a different country? Because you can suck him off so good?"
"Wow, Ser-" Clara tried to intervene.
"Did you cheat on him and break his heart in the process? What must you have done to ruin the poor man that-"
"Would you cut it out? Just because I met Nicolas unexpectedly and happened to fall for him, does not mean I did it to make you, out of all people, upset. He was interested in me just as I was interested in him, so I'm finding it hard to understand why you're so caught up in my personal life when you clearly should put more attention on your own. Maybe then you'd have a partner and wouldn't try to ruin other people's relationships in the process," she stared at me almost wide-eyed as her muscles tensed and her jaw clenched. I did not think that I would have to deal with people like her during this trip and ever since coming back to Italy.
Why on Earth was she so jealous of my relationship? Sure, I couldn't lie and say that Nicolas wasn't a catch but just because I managed to get intertwined with him, does not mean that I was somehow at fault for it.
"How about-"
"Screw this, I'm done," she pushed herself out of the pool and stormed off, into the villa, while the rest of us sat there completely dumbfounded.
"Is she that attracted to him?" I asked the girls. Clara seemed like she didn't think she belonged to be in the middle of this, which I couldn't blame her for, and Verona just floated on her back in the water, looking up at the colourful sky before commenting on the situation.
"I think she's just upset her life isn't as eventful. Or perhaps she doesn't have a handsome man to fuck at night," I placed my plate down on the small table in between the lounge chairs Clara and I sat on.
"I just think it's immature, really," Clara said as I glanced her way. She took her sunglasses off and looked me in the eyes. "Don't let it get to your head, Bri. It's not your fault you met the sexiest bachelor and made him fall in love with you," I smiled in gratitude before looking back at the stunning view before us.
I did love Nicolas. I was sure of that and was almost certain he did love me too. I guess he'd made that clear with everything that went between us. My heart just ached since I couldn't be with him and our daughter. I wanted to see the happiness for real than through a screen. But we'd have time.
I was sure of it.
--------
My bags had been taken to my room a few minutes before when I reached my door and felt relief flood my body. I could finally relax until the wedding and wait for Nicolas to come back from across the ocean.
I opened the door, immediately being hit with the darkness of the room. The curtains were closed, and not a single stray of light was visible from the outside apart from the one coming from the hallway. It made my stomach turn but for some reason, I remained as calm and collected as I could.
I entered the room, the door behind me still open slightly and hit the light switch.
Nothing.
I frowned as I placed my black handbag on the floor and tried it again but nothing came out of it. But just before I was about to head towards the windows and open them in order to make the room lighter, I heard a soft chuckle.
My entire body froze but I felt a rush of thrill run through me. I knew that chuckle better than anything in this world and I would be lying if I said that it didn't make me want to crawl all the way to him.
"Nicolas," I breathed out as I stared in complete darkness. I knew he sat in the far-left corner from where the sound came from, but I couldn't see his silhouette.
"Close the door," he said in his rough voice, sounding demanding. The rational side of me wanted to ask him what he was doing but I refrained and turned on my heels to close the doors, letting the entire room submerge itself in darkness.
I waited by the door for him to do anything else, and my heart began racing. I had missed him so much, I wanted nothing more than to wrap my arms around him but I knew he was going somewhere with this. "Lock it," he said again, referring to the door. I did as he said and took a few steps forward. It seemed like there was nothing other than complete silence and darkness surrounding us. Like we were in a secluded area deep in the depths of open space and were able to enjoy each other's company without anyone bothering us.
I was about to speak when I felt his hot breath against my shoulder. "Nicolas," I breathed out, feeling my eyes close due to the exhilarating feel of him so close to me.
"Shh," he shushed me by my ear before his hand touched my waist, sending an electrical current down my spine. "Only good girls get rewarded," I almost smiled if he had not spun me around so fast and pushed me against his body. Owing to that, I almost lost my footing. His strong arm held me tightly around my waist and once his mouth was near my ear, I felt his hard-on press against my ass. "I missed you so fucking much, fiore," I smiled as my head tilted back and touched his head. A groan left his throat as his fingers gripped my waist tighter.
"I missed you too," I breathed out, feeling him smile against my skin before he placed a kiss on my left shoulder, exactly where the tattoo was. Almost as though he knew exactly where it was, which made my heart soar.
"I missed how you feel against me, amore," he breathed out, making me shiver. His free hand trailed my arms until it reached my chest. He then slowly drew circles around my breasts before he cupped one of them with his hand.
"I missed how you feel inside me," my words came out as a whisper. I heard an amused breath leave his mouth before another kiss touched my shoulder.
"I wasn't sure you'd want me after such a long flight," he whispered, making goosebumps spread all throughout my body. I was so lost in the way his voice affected me, that I didn't realise he had released me from his hold and disappeared from behind me. I frowned and turned around on my heels, trying to sense where the man might have gone.
I began to worry that it was just my imagination like I thought the night in my house was (even if the jackass admitted to breaking into my house. Just imagine how the entire situation would've been different if he had seen Evara or even a picture of her on my shelves), but I knew now that Nicolas was truly here. I couldn't have been dreaming.
"Nico?" I called out for him but got no response. The fucking man used my in-love ass to run. "Nicolas, I'm not joking anymore. This is not pleasant," I said before a hand wrapped around the back of my throat, sending a jolt through my heart. I knew it was Nicolas from his signature scent but the thought of him taunting me like this made me hostile just as much as it made me aroused.
"But I loved this," he cooed, one hand moving down my stomach slowly down to my centre. "I love being the ghost in this room with you right now, Brielle," my knees went weak at the sound of my name rolling off his tongue so effortlessly. "I love having you so close to me, fiore," he whispered against my neck before his lips touched his favourite spot. "I love having you so close to submitting to me, Bri," another kiss. "I love you so much, Brielle Hansley," a smile carved itself on my face as I tilted my head back and hit his shoulder, feeling his hand slip under my grey sweatpants and panties before his fingers brushed lightly against my swollen clit.
"Nico-"
"I am in love with you, amore, and I can't help it," he breathed out, tightening his hold on my throat.
I was so in love with this man that I trusted him with my entire life. I trusted him to care for me and keep all of my secrets to himself. I had little to no doubts that I couldn't confide in him.
"I can't help but want you every damn second I inhale," another kiss. "And every time I exhale," his fingers gently rubbed my nerve as I grabbed onto his forearm, slowly digging my fingers into his skin. He didn't hiss or react in any way that would indicate his pain or discomfort. In fact, he enjoyed it. Nicolas chuckled against my skin as he inserted a finger inside me, making me moan at the sudden sensation.
My need for him ran deeper than any wound. My desire for him was etched so deeply inside my heart that I couldn't think straight. All that I cared about was him and I was glad I realised it before I deluded myself into believing otherwise.
"I love how you fucking feel, fiore," I sucked in a breath as he worked his fingers faster, making my pulse increase as the arousal spread throughout my body. "I love every damn inch of you," he whispered against my ear as my eyes rolled back and his hold on me tightened, keeping me on my feet. "I would die for every single atom that you are made of," I bit my bottom lip as my toes curled in my sneakers and I began to come closer to my release. The heel of his palm gently rubbed my clit, giving me all of the sensations, he could at once.
On top of that, he was filling my heart so full with those words, that I thought I would literally collapse underneath him. His words seemed so damn real and genuine that I was beginning to feel as though I came back here and was elevated to cloud nine.
Without even seeing the man with my own two eyes.
"I am nothing without you, Brielle," he kissed my cheek as my legs tensed and my nails dug deep into his arm. "I will be in love with you until the end of fucking time," he breathed out, bringing me the release I'd missed so much while I was away. I shattered beneath his touch, my breaths becoming rigid.
"Nicolas-" His hand spun me around before his lips slammed against mine and stole every damn breath that was coming. I placed my hands on his rough shoulders, feeling his bare skin. I relished his soft skin as he devoured my mouth, letting his tongue brush inside my mouth. One of his hands moved down to my ass which he squeezed hard, while the other one held the side of my face with so much possessiveness that made me lose my ability to think.
His hand moved down to my hip before he grabbed me and lifted me up as I wrapped my legs around his waist. Never leaving my lips, he walked over to what I presumed would be the bed and with so much care and gentleness laid me down. He broke the contact of our lips before I felt his hand brush my forehead, moving any of my hair away from my face.
Then he was gone, his touch, completely absent from my skin, yet the feeling lingered. A second later, I almost flinched from the sound of the curtains being pulled. Looking to the side, the silhouette of the most handsome man appeared, making me smile.
"There you are," I mumbled, making him smile. The moonlight was enough to light up some of the room and make the definite darkness disappear even a little bit. Once he was in front of me again, I got to look at his tattoo-covered chest. The tattoo of a rose on his ribcage was one I first noticed now and back all those years when I first met him.
And slept with him on the same day.
A spider was inked on the left side of his torso, while a few skulls decorated his arms. His left elbow was inked with a spiderweb with a smaller spider underneath it. There were a few tattoos with words on them but I could only make out one and even that one I could hardly see due to the lightning.
Libertà.
Freedom.
I didn't notice how he smiled so faintly as he stared at me when I found a quote written on the inside of his upper arm. I frowned as I sat up and gently grabbed his wrist before twisting it to get a better look. Nicolas didn't object to any of it and rather stared at me while I roamed his body with my eyes.
You call it hope — that fire of fire! It is but agony of desire.
I smiled as I reread the quote and noticed his favourite author's words. I looked up at Nicolas, whose eyes shone even in the dim light.
"When did you get this?" I asked, knowing I certainly did not see it before.
"Sometime this week," I almost rolled my eyes but refrained. "We had time to kill before meeting Eva," my heart skipped a beat upon hearing her name come out of his mouth. It seemed so natural yet my heart couldn't be happier. "This one too," he turned and pointed to the words on his right shoulder blade.
We loved with a love that was more than a love.
I smiled before he turned back to me and leaned down. His lips softly touched mine just as my heart was about to burst as everything this evening set into place.
Nicolas's words, his touch, the tattoos. All of it made me want to cry.
He gently pushed me back onto my back as he worked the knot of my sweatpants. I tugged his hair gently, learning a groan from him. Nicolas pulled my pants down along with my panties before dropping them somewhere on the floor. He was about to get down on his knees when I cupped his face and stopped him. Nico smiled at my attempt to stop him.
"If you're about to tell me that I should be getting my release right now, then I do not agree. I like the tension you make me feel, fiore," he pecked my lips before he lowered himself and blushed his tongue against my clit. My eyes rolled back into my head as I gasped for air and arched my back.
"Oh, Nicolas," I moaned out, his hands gripping my hips as he tortured my bundle of nerves with his. He gently sucked my clit as he lowered one of his hands and inserted a few digits inside my pussy. I felt an overwhelming amount of pleasure building as he poured all of his love out on me.
One of my hands gripped his hair, while I gripped one of my breasts. My moans filled the room as Nicolas licked my clit with so much passion and need that it seemed like I was his final meal on Earth.
In this moment I actually despised myself for robbing myself of three years filled with this.
I gripped his hair harder as his fingers curled inside of me, hitting the spot. I almost screamed out before my mouth was covered with his rough palm. My eyes widened as he chuckled and nuzzled his face in the crook of my neck. I almost laughed but my orgasm took hold of my voice and body as I held onto his arm as my body shook with my second release of the night.
Feeling his lips against my skin, I began unbuckling his black pants as his kisses started to move onto my jaw. I palmed his hard-on through the fabric, making him curse under his breath.
"Bielle," he groaned, pressing his face against the side of mine. "You're killing me," I smiled before I wrapped my hand around his length and stroked it slowly at first, feeling his muscles tense under my touch. "Cazzo, amore mio. Non hai idea di quanto ti amo," he breathed out before his teeth nipped the skin on my neck and a groan followed.
I quickened my tempo as I placed a kiss on his cheek and caressed his back as my hand moved up and down his shaft. Nicolas gripped my tit and squeezed it as his groan deepened.
"I love you," I whispered, feeling him smile against my skin, which in turn made me smile.
"Fucking hell," he moaned out before he gripped my throat with his hand and kissed me so hard, I froze in place. He took advantage of that as he positioned himself at my entrance before thrusting in so roughly, my eyes shot open, the feeling rippling through my bones. He fucked me roughly, taking every bit of his frustration onto me as his mouth explored my own.
I dug my nails into his back, my walls clenching tightly around the thick length of him. He was right, no one was ever able to make me feel this good. I didn't want to feed his ego by admitting it to his face but he was right all those years ago when we met the first time in Ada and I's last home.
Nicolas pulled away before he flipped me onto my stomach and rose my hips in the air. He was inside me in a matter of seconds and the emptiness I'd felt a moment ago was replaced by complete and utter pleasure. I wondered if the room was truly as soundproof as he told me it was before and despite the loud clapping noise he made every time his pelvis hit my ass, I couldn't even be bothered to worry about it.
My mind was fogged with the beautiful bliss that came with being with Nicolas. He was able to make me forget anything and everything that was wrong or difficult in my life by just being there with me. I didn't know that loving another person was so blissful but I couldn't complain.
His hands held my waist firmly as he pounded me from the back. I gripped the sheets beneath me as hard as I could when another release came closer and closer with each thrust. Nicolas's groans were probably one of the most mesmerizing sounds that I'd ever heard and to hear them now was like a cherry on top of an ice cream sundae. So much as the noise he made as his own release approached made me let go of my restraints and come before I felt him slow his tempo as another loud groan escaped his throat.
The only thing that was left, was the rigid breathing of both of us combined before he leaned down and placed a kiss on my shoulder before laying down beside me. I turned my body to be on my back and looked up at the ceiling as we both tried to catch our breaths.
"I missed you," he said, making me grin like a kid on Christmas. He wrapped one of his arms around my shoulders before pulling me closer to his side, where his warmth engulfed me and practically glued me to him.
"How was the trip?" I asked, feeling some excitement run through my veins.
"It was better than I could've imagined," I smiled up at him and noticed the way his face relaxed at the thought of our daughter.
Our daughter.
"I cannot believe I'm a father," I kissed the side of his chest before resting my head against him.
"I thought that you would try and question if I wasn't trying to trick you into giving me social benefits," Nicolas chuckled, pressing me even tighter against his side.
"First of all, she looks like me. Second, I know you better than that," I smiled, feeling that newly familiar warm feeling spread in my chest. "She's perfect. Absolutely perfect," he placed a kiss on my head. "I didn't think it would be so hard to say goodbye to her but I know we'll be back there soon enough."
"Yeah. I miss her even more," Nicolas's hand caressed my upper arm as we lay there, chatting like a normal couple with nothing but love and respect for one another. To hell with the secrets that are keeping us away from his family. All I cared about was that we were happy together.
"I wish I'd been there during the delivery. Especially since it was hard," he said quietly. "I wanted you to shatter the bones in my hand," I managed to laugh.
"I didn't give birth to her naturally," I said and sat up, so I could show him the faint scar on my lower stomach. His eyes dropped down to it immediately. "This isn't the exact scar from Evara since it was cut open again to perform the procedure afterwards," worry crept on his face as he rested his head against his hand and brought the other one to my stomach. "And as much as it hurt, it wasn't half as bad as what other women have to go through with natural births. I guess I'm slightly fortunate," I managed to show a faint lift of my lips but as I carefully watched Nico's face, my heart began to melt. I placed a hand on his cheek as his fingers brushed my scar. "Don't cry," he didn't look up at me but I saw the tears that began to form in his eyes. I cupped his face with both my hands and kissed him, his free arm wrapping around my waist. Once I pulled away, I wiped away the tears that had managed to roll down his cheeks and smiled at him. "I love you. And you should be hating me for keeping her away from you. This all just shows how good of a man you are, Nicolas. You have no idea how lucky Evara is to have you as her father," I said, making a smile appear on his face. "And all of the pain I might have suffered during her birth might compensate even a little bit of what you had to go through," he began to shake his head as another tear fell.
"Don't say that. You don't deserve to feel any type of pain, fiore." I kissed him, feeling my heart come close to exploding for real this time. It was so full of love for this man that I wanted to scream it from the top of the rooftops. Once I pulled away, I curled up at his side and just relished in his warmth and presence. "How was your trip?"
"Interesting, to say the least," Nico let out an amused breath.
"How come?"
"You know this friend of Vittoria's Serena?" I glanced up at him and saw him shake his head. "She was so jealous of me that Vic and she got into an argument and left the villa we stayed at on bad terms," Nico glanced down at me. "And Vic was mostly upset because she thought that she was using her to get closer to you," Nicolas began to laugh before I gently slapped his chest. "It is not funny. She was her good friend."
"Amore, good friends don't get jealous over things like that and certainly don't use their friends for personal gain," he said. "I would've just loved to see your face when she said it," he winked at me, making me roll my eyes.
"Verona and Vic's other friend Clara stood up for me. Even if they all think that we're not together." Nicolas pulled me closer before tipping my head back and kissing my lips.
"Well, they'rein for a shock, aren't they?" I smiled before he kissed me again and madeall of my doubts and worries drift away.