The Glade is quiet, the kind of silence that weighs heavily on your chest, making it hard to breathe. I sit alone in my spot by the Deadheads, replaying the events of the last few hours in my mind. The Grievers, Alby's death, the fight with Teresa—all of it feels like a twisted dream I can't wake up from. But it's real. Too real.
I'm trying to focus, trying to think about what needs to be done next, but my mind keeps drifting back to Gally. My little brother. Him and Emmette are the only family I have left here, and I know he's been struggling with everything that's happened. Part of me wants to find him, to make sure he's okay, but another part of me is still so angry, so hurt by what Teresa said, by how Thomas reacted... I don't know if I can face anyone right now.
I hear footsteps approaching and tense, half expecting it to be Thomas or Teresa, but it's not. When I look up, I see Minho, his expression serious as he comes to stand in front of me.
"Hey," he says quietly, his voice careful.
"Hey," I reply, my voice flat. I don't have the energy to say much else.
Minho sits down beside me, close enough that our shoulders almost touch but not quite. He doesn't say anything for a moment, just sits there with me, and somehow that's more comforting than any words could be.
After a while, he finally speaks. "You know we have to go soon, right? If we're going to make it out of here, we need to stick to the plan."
I nod, though the idea of leaving the Glade still feels surreal. "I know," I say softly. "But Gally... he's not going to want to go."
Minho sighs, running a hand through his hair. "Yeah, I figured as much. He's always been... well, you know how he is."
"Stubborn as hell," I finish for him, a small, sad smile tugging at my lips. "Just like me."
"Just like you," Minho agrees, nudging me gently with his elbow. "But we need you, Esme. I need you."
I turn to look at him, surprised by the intensity in his voice. There's something in his eyes, something more than just concern for the plan or our escape. It's something deeper, something I've felt from him before but have never quite known how to respond to.
"Minho..." I start, but he cuts me off, shaking his head.
"Don't," he says, his voice dropping to a whisper. "I'm not trying to make things more complicated for you. I just... I care about you, Esme. More than I probably should. And I need to know that you're with us, that you're going to see this through."
His words hit me hard, cutting through the fog of grief and anger that's been clouding my mind. I've always known Minho had feelings for me, but hearing him say it out loud, especially now, makes my heart ache in a way I wasn't prepared for.
I look away, staring at the ground as I try to find the right words. "I don't know what I'm doing anymore, Minho," I admit, my voice barely above a whisper. "Everything's just so messed up. Alby's gone, and Gally's barely holding it together. And Thomas... I don't even know where I stand with him anymore."
Minho reaches out and takes my hand, his grip firm but gentle. "You don't have to figure it all out right now," he says. "But you do need to make a choice. Are you going to let everything that's happened break you, or are you going to fight back?"
His words strike a chord deep inside me, and I feel a spark of determination flare up in my chest. He's right. I can't let all of this defeat me. I have to keep going, for Gally, for everyone who's still here.
For Alby.
"I'll fight," I say, my voice stronger now. "But I'm not going to abandon Gally. If he doesn't want to go, I'm staying with him."
Minho's grip tightens on my hand, but he doesn't argue. He just nods, understanding in his eyes. "I figured you'd say that. But if it comes down to it... if it's between saving Gally and saving yourself, you need to think about what Alby would want you to do."
I flinch at the mention of Alby, but I know Minho is right. Alby wouldn't want me to throw my life away, not for anyone. But Gally is my brother. I can't just leave him behind.
"Let's just hope it doesn't come to that," I say, my voice wavering slightly.
Minho pulls me into a hug then, holding me tight, and for a moment I let myself relax into his embrace. It's comforting, being close to him like this, but it also makes everything feel more complicated. I care about Minho, I really do, but my feelings for Thomas... they're still there, even after everything that's happened.
When Minho finally pulls back, he looks at me with a mix of concern and something else I can't quite place. "We're going to make it out of here, Esme," he says firmly. "All of us."
I want to believe him, I really do. But deep down, I'm not sure if that's possible anymore. Too much has happened, and I don't know if we can all survive this.
But I nod anyway, forcing a smile. "Yeah. We will."
Minho gives me one last squeeze before standing up. "I'll let you know when it's time. Just... think about what I said, okay?"
"I will," I promise, even though I'm not sure what I'm going to do.
As Minho walks away, I'm left alone with my thoughts once again. The sun is higher in the sky now, casting long shadows over the Glade. The day is just beginning, but I already feel exhausted.
I close my eyes, taking a deep breath as I try to push all the conflicting emotions out of my mind. There's no time for second-guessing or doubts. We're running out of time, and I need to be ready for whatever happens next.
For now, I have to focus on the mission. I have to make sure that when we leave this place, we're ready for whatever's out there. Because once we step outside those walls, there's no going back.
I stand up, feeling a new sense of purpose filling me. Whatever happens, I'm not going to let Alby's death be in vain. I'm going to see this through, no matter what.
And if that means making some hard choices along the way, so be it.