It did cross Karina's mind that she might've been making the wrong decision, endeavouring to become Winter's legal guardian for reasons other than just protecting her. She admitted feelings were involved, but to what extent? And to what extent was it morally acceptable for Karina to go through with this? She had no idea whether her choice would help or hurt Winter more; she'd never done anything like this before. But Karina knew she couldn't just sit around and do nothing, waiting for another idea to pop into her head while Yeji plotted her next scheme. Karina's feelings for Winter were growing stronger by the day, and she could barely understand it herself. But she needed Winter to feel comfortable with the changes they were making. And so far, she seemed to be.
"...How would you feel about me taking over your guardianship?"
""
"Win-Winter...? If you don't want me to, that's fine. I'll think of something-"
"A- Are you being serious, Ms. Yu?"
"Yes! Yes, of course I am. It'll take some time, but I can sort things out and make it happen."
"So... wh- what will that mean for me?"
Karina couldn't believe this. She subconsciously pulled her coat tighter around her body, an unexplainable wave of nervousness washing over her. "I'll come down to your foster home and do the paperwork, and see you and your current guardian. Taeyeon-ssi will probably want to see you and me interact a bit. After I get approval from the school, you can... you can come home with me."
Karina was glad they had that conversation over the phone, because she could practically feel Winter's anxiety radiating through the speakers as she expressed her consent and excitement. Karina spared her further torture and they continued this important conversation in school. In the meantime, she prepared all the necessary documents: her identification, education and teaching records, and her portfolio. She needed to prove that she was fit to take care of Winter.
That very weekend, Karina drove to the foster home to sit down for a private meeting with Taeyeon. She seemed to be less hostile towards her this time compared to their very first phone conversation. Karina guessed that Taeyeon was just protective of Winter and distrusted her initially. It was good. Karina was glad Winter had had a responsible guardian all this while, instead of someone representative of the messed-up foster care system.
Karina talked with Taeyeon for a whole two hours, going through the formalities of discussing Winter's new living conditions, whether Karina was financially able to provide for Winter's daily needs, and her adequate knowledge of Winter's mental health needs and requirements. Karina demonstrated enough legitimacy and stability to move Taeyeon because she was eventually presented with all the paperwork necessary for the transfer of legal guardianship.
As Karina was filling in the forms, Taeyeon asked," When can Winter move in to your place?"
"Give me a few days, Taeyeon-ssi. I'll get back in contact with you. I have to seek approval from my school superiors first," Karina explained.
"Alright, will do," Taeyeon agreed. After a slight pause, she added," While you're writing up those forms, shall I call Winter in? You can tell her that the agreement is done on our side, at least."
"Oh," Karina tried not to blush. "Sure."
Taeyeon left the room, and a few minutes later, Karina heard approaching, discordant footsteps shuffling close.
"Why did you wake me up, Taeyeon unnie?" Winter's sleepy voice could be heard from just around the corner, and it made Karina's heart melt.
"You're not supposed to be napping in the afternoon, Winter-ah. Anyway, hurry up. Your new guardian is in this room."
Karina turned around in her chair to face the entrance. And standing in the doorway was the cutest sight she'd ever seen: Winter, with messy hair and half-open eyes, dressed in pompompurin yellow print pyjamas. It was such a stark contrast to the image Winter usually portrayed in school. Karina stared. She couldn't get enough of this Winter. She wanted this image burned in her memory forever. She could hardly contain herself.
Winter's eyes immediately snapped open in shock and alarm. Her face turned bright red. "Unnie! Why didn't you tell me Ms. Yu was here? Oh my god oh my god... I- I'm going to go upstairs and change... um... w- wait for me!"
Karina just chuckled and gave Winter an 'ok' sign, before the younger ran off. Taeyeon sat back down with Karina at the table.
"Winter always seems nervous around you or when we talk about you," Taeyeon commented.
Part of Mina was overjoyed that she had such an effect on Winter, but she wasn't so sadistic either. She wanted Winter to feel comfortable around her too. And she was afraid this reaction towards her was giving off a negative impression.
"I can explain-"
"I understand,"Taeyeon cut Karina off with a knowing smile. "Winter gets like that with someone she likes and is learning to trust."
Karina chewed on that for a while before Winter returned a few minutes later, wearing a simple jumper and baggy pants this time. She was still blushing and looked nervous as she sat down next to Taeyeon across the table from Karina.
"S- Sorry, Ms. Yu... y- you weren't supposed to see... that..." Winter mumbled, avoiding eye contact.
"It's okay," Karina smiled. You looked cute, Karina wanted to say, but she held it in because they weren't alone. She slid her completed paperwork across the table to Taeyeon, who read it through before filing it away. "I'm legally your guardian now, Winter."
"R- Really?"
"Yes. I just need to talk to the school first, before you can move in with me," Karina explained. She tried her best to keep her expression neutral. Secretly, the thought of seeing Winter in her own home, and Winter seeing her every day, was too much to handle.
Winter probably felt the same way. Winter probably wished to be alone with Karina right then too. And Karina wished she knew whether Winter felt like the table between them was a safety barrier or an obstacle.
"I get that you've already gotten the guardianship signed over to you," Nayeon sighed. "But I'd really, really advise you not to go through with it, Karina. Winter is your student, first and foremost. You'll be of the most help to her here in school, not in your own residence."
"And I've been trying for months," Karina countered. "It's more than what I'm required to do, I'm sure you know, and it'll extend beyond my capabilities if I keep this up. I can't keep an eye on Winter 24/7 without sacrificing my attention on my other students, Nayeon-ssi. The foster system is flawed. I have the ability and desire to take her into my home, so why can't 1?"
"Because it's highly inappropriate. I know you're doing more than what you're supposed to out of the kindness of your own heart, but is all this really necessary? Think this through, Karina."
"Winter needs help and no one can give it to her at the moment. It may be unusual but it isn't breaking any laws or rules, is it?"
Nayeon rubbed her temples. "No, it's not... Listen, I don't understand why you want to do this so badly. Are Winter's needs really that urgent to you?"
A bit of heat rushed to Karina's head, a mixture of slight anger and overprotectiveness towards Winter. Based on her professional experience, she knew Winter's depressive and self-harming tendencies put her at a higher risk for long-term cutting and potential suicide. But she didn't feel like sharing that information with Nayeon after she'd basically spent this whole meeting diminishing Winter's struggles.
"Yes, they are. Very," Karina answered simply.
"I still won't allow it" Nayeon responded, not budging an inch in her disapproval. When she saw that Karina was unmoving, she sighed again. "Do you want to speak with Ms. Park?"
Ms. Park Jihyo was the principal of Seoul Arts High School. Karina had only spoken to her in person three times so far: during her interview, her trainee teacher evaluation, and to receive one of her progress reports. The rest of their discourse usually occurred over email, and Karina was thankful for that. It wasn't because Ms. Park was unpleasant to work for, far from that, actually. She was an intelligent, warm, highly effective leader. She treated all of her faculty members fairly, giving praise where it was due and addressing problems when they arose. But Karina was still slightly intimidated by Ms. Park's power. She didn't know how old Ms. Park was, but she knew she was really young to be promoted to a principle so quickly. Karina guessed that she was a scholar or an international degree-holder, explaining her all-rounded competence.
And now Karina was sitting in her office, nausea swamping her senses, because Ms. Park's view on this whole situation literally determined her and Winter's fate.
"I understand you want to take over guardianship of a student of yours... Winter. I know about her. She's the one who's in foster care, right? Senior student."
"Y- Yes. That's right," Karina nodded. She was trying hard but failing to conceal her nervousness.
Ms. Park smiled kindly. "Relax, Karina. Luckily for you, my views on this matter differ from Nayeon's quite a bit. I do think poor Winter has been suffering in silence for too long, and we only have the state and the foster system to blame. I'm glad that you stepped up to the plate and reached out to her, and that she's responded to your call. I'm proud to have a teacher like you in my school."
Karina finally loosened her death-grip on the handles of the chair she was sitting in, just a little. "Thank you for saying so, Ms. Park."
"My only concern is whether you'll be able to handle the workload of having to care for Winter almost constantly, on top of having a full-time job as a teacher here. It'll be a big lifestyle change and you won't have much time to transition into it," Ms. Park said.
"I understand where you're coming from," Karina agreed. "I believe I'm as prepared as I can be to take on this challenge, though. I've thought a lot of things through before this... like my living situation, Winter's healthcare, finances, and how I'll balance my work. I'm going to try my best not to sacrifice any part of it."
Winter's confidence and conviction seemed to convince Ms. Park. "Alright. I was just worried about you, Karina, but you know how capable I think you are. I give you my full support. Let me know if there's anything I can do to help you regarding work, or if you need me to reorganise your duties. I can link you up to Giselle too, since you two have such good rapport."
Karina blinked. "Ms. Park, does this mean..."
"Yes, Karina. You can bring Winter home."
"Heyyyy, Karina! I heard the news from Ms. Park. You're adopting Winter? Oh my god. You know I saw this coming, right? And of course I'll help you with your work! You could've just asked!" Giselle rambled as she barged into Karina's office, alarming the latter.
"I'm not 'adopting' Winter," Karina shuddered. She was too young to be a parent. "I'm just her legal guardian now."
"Eh, no difference," Giselle shrugged, then she giggled weirdly.
"Are you drunk?" Karina asked.
"No, I'm just really excited that you're exploring your sexuality!" Giselle replied.
Karina put down her pen and stopped grading the essay she was currently reading. There was no way she could concentrate with Giselle in the room. "What's the matter with you, Gigi?"
"Nothing," Giselle responded innocently. "But you know it's against school policy to have romantic relations with a student, right?"
Karina sighed and rubbed her face. "Yes, I know that. Now stop insinuating things!"
"Why don't you trust me, Karina?" Giselle pouted, toning down for a second. It tugged at Karina's heartstrings.
"What do you mean? Of course I trust you, Giselle."
"I heard that Winter was moving in with you from Ms. Park and not you, sign number one of distrust," Giselle stated.
Karina swallowed the uncomfortable feeling that was rising in her throat. Why didn't Karina trust Giselle enough to tell her about what was truly going on between her and Winter? It was probably because Giselle was a fellow teacher, technically Karina's superior at that, and she knew all too well the rules and regulations guarding this institution. Karina was afraid of letting Giselle know, and afraid of a bad reaction from a friend she treasured dearly. Besides, if their positions were switched and Giselle was the one dating her student instead, Karina wasn't sure how she'd react either. This whole period of uncertainty was something Karina had to work through alone, possibly with Winter, but it was something she wanted to keep from Giselle for now.
"I'm sorry, Gigi. I'll tell you everything that's going on next time, okay?" Karina promised, and that technically wasn't a lie. Giselle was still pouting, but she seemed satisfied since she stopped protesting. "And thank you for saying you'll help me at work. I really appreciate it."
Winter was sitting with Ryujin in their Chemistry class again. Winter had paid attention at the beginning of the lesson, when their teacher was giving exam tips for the college entrance final, but now she was back to doodling.
"Psst, Win," Ryujin whispered not-so-quietly.
"Hm?"
"Wanna come over to my house after school today? We can do homework and watch movies," Ryujin suggested. Winter was grateful. Ryujin often invited her to hang out at her place, since Winter would get bored and lonely by herself. Unfortunately, she couldn't accept the invitation today.
"Sorry, Ryu, I can't today," Winter whispered back.
"Why? I thought you're not working today?"
Winter hesitated. "I'm not, I'm... moving out."
Ryujin gasped loudly in joy and surprise, causing the teacher to turn around and shush her. She apologised, and he resumed his lecture on organic compounds.
"A family came to adopt you?" Ryujin asked.
"Not exactly... just one person. She... um, signed my guardian forms and I'm moving into her house today." Winter might as well tell Ryujin now.
"Oh my god! Who is this angel? She's not shady, is she?" Ryujin questioned.
"It's Ms. Yu."
A half-yell, half-gurgle sound came out from Ryujin's mouth, causing their Chemistry teacher to finally lose it.
He turned around and shot Dahyun a look. "Ryujin, if you don't stop distracting Winter, I'm going to have to ask you to sit somewhere else."
And that put an end to their conversation, for now.
Winter didn't have a lot of belongings. Her parents had sold most of her things of value, when they were still around. And of course, Child Protective Services took a lot of her stuff too when they found her all abused and neglected in her old home. So she lived minimalistically. When she showed up to Ms. Yu's car carrying only two camping bags, she looked a little confused.
"Where's your suitcase?" Ms. Yu asked.
"I don't have any... This is all my stuff," Wnter replied. Ms. Yu suddenly looked ashamed.
"Oh. I'm sorry, Winter."
"It's okay."
Ms. Yu helped pack Winter's things into the trunk of her car, and they were all ready to set off for her house. They were going to ride there separately in their own vehicles, partly because Winter needed to park her motorcycle at Ms. Yu's house now, and partly because it would look strange if Winter got into Ms. Yu's car in front of all the other students.
Ms. Yu navigated the roads to her house slowly, making sure Winter could tail her closely on her bike. They arrived in about 20 minutes, and more than anything, Winter was excited. Ms. Yu's apartment complex looked modern and comfortable, even lavish compared to her old residence in the foster home. This was her new life. And she was so lucky to have someone like Ms. Yu share this with her.
Winter followed Ms. Yu upstairs. They rode up a shiny elevator to get to the 12th floor, and Winter tried to hide her excitement. She didn't want to seem lame in front of Ms. Yu, because she'd been climbing stairs all her life and this was all new to her. She remained unaware that Ms. Yu found her fascination and amazement extremely adorable. Ms. Yu gave her her very own key card to the apartment, with the unit number written on the back in case Winter forgot.
And then Winter arrived to Ms. Yu's actual apartment. Ms. Yu showed her around. It wasn't large, technically, but to Winter, any apartment seemed huge compared to her old room. Ms. Yu's place was modern and fashionable, but her furnishings and appliances were practical and provided a sense of warmth and comfort as well. It was clean, tidy, and Winter liked the white and glass scheme that Ms. Yu had going on. This was exactly what she'd expected Ms. Yu's house to look like.
Once Ms. Yu showed Winter where all the rooms were, she led Winter to her very own bedroom. Winter should've expected this, but she was still taken aback by how much thought Ms. Yu had put into her staying here, and how prepared she was for everything. Winter's room was massive. She had a twin-sized bed which was big enough to roll around in and fill with plushies if she so desired, a spacious clothes closet, and a generous study desk and cabinets. Winter was worried that Ms. Yu had given her the bigger room, until Ms. Yu took her to her master bedroom and realised that that was even larger.
"I hope this is okay, Winter," Ms. Yu said. Oh, she had no idea. This was so much more than just okay. "You can take your time to unpack."
Winter unpacked, which didn't take very long, as expected. When she came back out into the living room, she saw Ms. Yu sitting on the couch, using her laptop. She looked up upon noticing Winter's reappearance.
"Oh, Winter! Come sit here with me for a while."
Winter gulped. She tried to psyche herself out; she couldn't have her heart racing all the time in this house, since, well, this was her house now too. She had a choice between a seat next to Ms. Yu on the couch, or an adjacent armchair. Her flight response was telling her to pick the chair, but she didn't want to hurt Ms. Yu's feelings, nor did she want to stay stuck and never get closer to Ms. Yu just because of her anxiety. So despite her shakiness, Winter sat down next to Ms. Yu.
Ms. Yu seemed surprised, but not unhappy. In fact, she looked like she was trying to suppress a smile.
"Look here, Winter," Ms. Yu said, and Winter looked at the laptop screen. It showed the webpage of a premier psychiatry clinic. "This is quite a bit of a drive away, but I think it's the best after researching. What do you say if I arrange an appointment for you to get an assessment and talk to one of the therapists?"
Winter hugged a cushion to her body. "I don't know..."
"I think it'll really help, Winter. For the long-term. Won't you consider it?" Ms. Yu tried again.
Winter nodded. "Okay... I'll do it. But do I really need to go for the therapy, though? I don't know how it works..." In truth, Winter was uncertain and scared. She'd never gotten any kind of proper psychiatric treatment before.
"You can just go for one session and stop if you don't like the doctor or you think they're not helping. Just tell me and I'll look for someone else. How about it?" Ms. Yu asked.
Winter just nodded.
"Great! I'm so proud of you, Winter. You're very brave, you know that? Now let me just-"
Ms. Yu turned back to her laptop and started typing furiously in the website text box, probably trying to contact a website administrator to arrange the appointments. Winter was alarmed.
"M- Ms. Yu, wait... isn't it expensive?"
Ms. Yu abruptly stopped typing and turned to Winter. "Don't worry about money, Winter. I'll take care of everything. Just focus on being healthy and happy, okay? That'll make me happy too."
"Ms. Yu..."
Winter's heart was pounding, her gut was twisting and turning as she stared into Ms. Yu's eyes. She couldn't understand why all these usually unpleasant sensations were mixing together to create a melody of euphoria in her system. Then again, she could never understand anything when it came to her feelings for Ms. Yu, and why they were so intense and unshakable. Winter was feeling something new this time; she wanted to get closer to Ms. Yu, physically. She'd never felt this before. Her walls were starting to break down and she felt like the usual way in which she expressed herself was no longer enough to return Ms. Yu's gestures. But Winter didn't know how to initiate anything when Ms. Yu didn't make any moves either. She was always so respectful of Winter's needs and space, but now that Winter was confused about it herself, she didn't know what to do.
Fortunately, Ms. Yu understood Winter better than she initially thought. She silently removed the pillow which was acting as a barrier between them, indicating that it was okay for Winter to come closer. Winter felt her face burn up as she scooted over to Ms. Yu; her poor heart was going to explode. It was Ms. Yu who first put her arms around Winter's small frame, gently guiding her into a warm embrace. Winter couldn't even remember the last time she hugged someone; she had no distinct memory of it. But now, she was wrapped in Ms. Yu's arms, and though her heartbeat was going haywire, she felt so loved and protected and safe. Nothing could hurt her. Winter liked this feeling; she liked it a lot. She could get used to this.
A few moments passed before Winter hesitantly put her arms around Ms. Yu's waist, and because her face was buried in Ms. Yu's shirt, she failed to see the smile that had formed on Ms. Yu's blushing face.
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Hi, I just got home from school since there's so many projects that i need to finish. I'm tired and out of myself, so if you guys see other names, might as well tell me because I'm so tired and sleepy.