I cringe. Miranda looks from me to my boyfriend behind me, comprehension filling her eyes.
"I'm sorry," she mouths at me and I nod, waiting until she's gone to turn around to face my doom.
"I should've told you—" I start, but he cuts me off.
"When?"
So I tell him. The lines on his face harden with every word I say, until his face resembles a stone mask.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
I bite my lip. Why didn't I? "I don't know."
"Avery..." he closes his eyes and drags a hand down his face. "I'm your boyfriend. You're supposed to tell me stuff like this. You're supposed to trust me."
"I do trust you," I say in a small voice. He just gives me an exasperated look. "I do. I guess I just... didn't think about it." It's true. I hadn't even thought about Nick straight after the incident. As I realize it I feel my stomach sinking. Why hadn't I thought about him afterwards? Shouldn't I have wanted him there to comfort me?
"Well that's just great," he says, hurt. I can see it in his eyes. Why am I always hurting him?
"I'm sorry," I try, "but I had Nate and Landon and-"
"Landon was there?" Something flashes in his eyes. Anger?
"Well, yes," I say, fearing his reaction. I know he's never liked Landon, one thing we have in common. He's about to say something but I beat him there. "But only because he was with Nate when it happened. I didn't ask him there."
Nick takes in a deep breath. "But when you got home, when you'd calmed down, when you'd slept over it... You didn't even think about calling me?"
I don't know what to say. Talking to to him about it hadn't even crossed my mind. It should have. He should be the one I can confide into. The one I'd want to confide into.
"I think..." he hesitates, looking at me with so much hurt in his eyes I just want the ground to swallow me whole. "I think we should call it quits." For real this time."
"Nick..." I try to grab his hand but he steps back out of my reach.
"I just can't do this anymore," he turns around and leaves me standing there with a bottomless pit in my stomach.
"Avery?" I hear Miranda's voice. "Are you okay?"
I gather myself up and plaster a smile on my face before turning around to face my best friend.
"Of course I'm okay," I lie, and I know she can see through it. She doesn't say anything though, just follows me to the drinks. "Never better," I mutter under my breath.
---
Two hours later and I'm drunk. Far past the tipsy giggling phase. I'm at a point where I don't care about anything else than having a good time. I laugh and dance and drink some more.
"Bathroom," I announce to my friends as I break from the group and walk past other drunken people to search for the room. I have to take support from the wall a few times but I manage to get to a hallway filled with closed doors. I open a promising looking one and step inside. Two hazy figures spring apart as if electrocuted. Not a bathroom.
"Oh, sorry," I giggle and am about to close the door when my eyes zero in on the guy. His shirt has disappeared somewhere and his jeans are hanging open, but it's the face that makes me stop. Nick swallows, his eyes guilty. I don't know how long we stand there looking at each other, but finally the red-haired girl clears her throat, holding her shirt to her chest.
"Oh, right," I give her a fleeting look. "Sorry to interrupt. Carry on," I slam the door behind me and scatter before having to listen to anything coming from that room.
I finally find the bathroom but I don't feel like partying anymore. I just want to go home and be alone. I text Stella that I'm taking a cab home, or at least try to. My fingers keep hitting the wrong buttons. Finally managing a somewhat readable text, I put my phone back in my pocket and find a cab outside. They always circle about when there's big parties filled with drunken people. I give the driver my address and lean back, trying not to think about Nick on top of the ginger.
---
The house is dark when I arrive. Right, Nate is at Sophie's and Landon is who knows where, probably at a bar trying to get into another girl's pants. I snort and climb the steps to the door a little unsteadily.
I search my purse and find my keys, but my fingers don't want to cooperate and the keys drop on the ground. I lean over to grab then, and almost fall over in the process. Okay, maybe I had a little too much to drink. After another try I get a hold of them and push the right one in the lock. Except that it doesn't hit the keyhole. The key scrapes the lock hold as I try and try to get it in.
The door opens suddenly from the inside, making me jump and land on my butt on the snow. Landon's face peers at me under the porch light.
"Thought I heard someone," he says, looking at me amused. I growl at him and try to get up, but fail miserably. He cocks an eyebrow at me.
"A little too much to drink?" He laughs.
"You're one to talk," I scowl, noticing the half-empty tequila bottle in his hand. He looks at it and shrugs. "Some of us can hold our liquor."
He watches as I grab a hold of the railing and pull myself up, not lifting a finger to help. He does clap though.
"Fuck off," I snap and push past him in the house. He raises his hands in mock surrender.
"Someone's in a bad mood," he leans against the wall and watches as I struggle out of my jacket and boots. He takes a healthy gulp of the tequila.
"And someone's an ass," I flash him a bitchy smile as I head past him to the kitchen. He follows me.
"Do you mind?" I turn to him, growling.
"Not at all," he smiles and takes a seat, still following my every move.
"Why are you so annoying?" I huff, opening a random cabinet door in search of a glass.
"Wrong cabinet," he smiles smugly, crossing his arms. I glare at him, but close the door and open the one next to it. Jackpot. I take a glass and go fill it with water. When I turn to him again, he's still staring at me over his bottle.
"What's got your panties in a twist tonight?" he snickers.
"You," I snap back, leaning against the sink and taking a sip of the water.
"You wish," he wiggles his brows at me, making me gag.
I scrunch up my nose at him. "You're disgusting."
He shrugs. We stay silent for a few minutes, both taking sips of our drinks.
"So you've just been home this whole night drinking by yourself?" I finally ask, my curious nature winning. I was sure he would be out tonight. He shrugs again. "Why go anywhere when you are your own best company?"
"Right..." I say slowly, eyeing him. He has dark circles under his eyes, which are a little red from drinking. He might not be as drunk as me, but he isn't sober either. I wonder if it has something to do with his dad. He notices my stare and grins.
"Take a picture. It'll last longer."
I roll my eyes. "Like I want to stare at your ugly face more than I already have to."
"Yeah, keep telling yourself that," he winks, annoying me beyond reason.
"You're such an arrogant ass," I groan and put my now empty glass on the table.
"Takes one to know one."
"Well, have fun drinking by your lonesome," I straighten up and storm past him. Or rather, try to. The sudden movement makes my head spin and I stumble. Strong arms catch me before I face plant the kitchen floor.
Startled, I look up and find Landon's face only a few inches from mine. I'm so close I can see the different tones of gray in his eyes. His warm breath fans my face and I can smell the liquor. Our noses are almost touching. I glance down at his lips, so close to mine. I tear my gaze from them and look back up to his eyes, eyes that are like molten silver. I swallow, my heart hammering in my chest, as if trying to break free. I can feel his heart doing the same thing, our breathing in sync.
I don't know which one of us moves first, or if we both do, but the gap between us disappears as our lips crash together. There's nothing gentle about it. It's hard and angry and fierce, full of frustration and need. My fingers go to his hair and I pull him closer, wanting him, needing him.
He lets out a low growl deep from his throat and wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me against him tighter. My skin is burning with fire in every part that touches him. He licks my bottom lip, asking for entrance. I give it to him. Our tongues clash together, battling for dominance.
He breaks free to let me catch my breath, but his mouth goes straight to my neck, kissing down to my collarbone, sucking and grazing with his teeth as he goes. My fingers grip his muscled shoulders, moans leaving my mouth as his mouth works on my neck, sending shivers everywhere.
I feel a need building between my legs, wanting more. I grab his head and bring his mouth back to mine, earning an animalistic sound from him. My hands roam down his chest, to the hem of his shirt and I push it up and over his head. I take in the glorious sight in front of me. God he's hot. I lick my lips, pressing my hands against his bare chest. His skin is burning up. I look up and meet his eyes, dark with desire.
His hands go to my waist and he picks me up and lowers me down to the kitchen island. My skirt drives up, baring my thighs. He moves to stand between my legs, his jeans grazing my skin.
I hold his gaze as I pull my top over my head, revealing a black lace bra. He eyes me hungrily, his hands caressing my sides and moving up to my breasts. His every touch is sending my nerve endings screaming. He lowers his head and trails kisses down my cleavage, his fingers opening the clasp at my back expertly. His hand goes to my breast and his thumb massages my hard nipple as his mouth sucks on my other one, making me throw my head back and moan loudly. I dig my nails in his back, wrapping my legs around his waist. I can feel his hard bulge straining against his jeans. My fingers work the buttons and I push them down.
His hand finds my thigh and and moves up, his fingers brushing my lace thongs. I can't help but gasp. Desire builds in my stomach and I grind against his hand, breathless. He moves the lace aside and massages my wet core.
"So wet," he whispers in my ear, turning me on even more, if possible. His lips move against mine as his free hand goes to my hard nipple and pulls at it gently. He pushes two fingers inside me, pumping them in and out in a steady rhythm, his thumb massaging my nub at the same time. My legs shake from the pleasure. I can't take this much longer. I'm so close.
"Go on," he whispers against my mouth. "Come for me." His words send me over the edge. My whole body shaking with ecstasy, I come on his hand. He waits for me to recover, caressing my breasts, my neck, my waist. I'm filled with need all over again. I want him. I need him in me. I push down his boxers, releasing his hardened cock and wrap my hand around it. He groans as I stroke him.
"Condom?" he asks, his voice breathless.
"I'm on the pill," I kiss his neck, all the while pumping his member, letting my thumb glide over its tip. I happen to know he takes regular checks, same as me, so we should be safe.
His hand goes to the back of my knee and pulls my leg up for better access. He positions his member to my entrance, looking me in the eye, asking a silent question. I grab his ass and pull him into me, that all the confirmation he needs.
I gasp as his full size fills me. Damn he's big. His mouth silences my moans as he pounds into me, harder and harder, as if nothing is enough. I arch my hips toward his, the pleasure inside me growing. I hold on as long as I can, but when he slams into me with everything he has, I let go.
"Fuck," I scream into his shoulder. He grunts as I tighten around his cock, pushing into me a few more times before finding his own release. I hang onto his shoulders as we catch our breaths, sweaty and shaking.
He then pulls out and pulls his boxers and jeans back up as I jump down from the counter and pull down my skirt. I snatch my bra and top from the floor and put them back on before facing Landon. He scratches the back of his neck, his forehead glistering with sweat. I feel the heat rise up my face and tuck a runaway lock of hair behind my ear. The moment is gone.
"Uh," is all he gets out. I don't think I've ever seen him this awkward.
"This changes nothing," I say, embarrassment guiding my words. "I still think you're an ass."
He grins, almost relieved. "And I still think you're a brat."
I wink and turn my back to him, heading to the kitchen door.
"Avery?"
"Hmm?" I look over my shoulder to see him standing there uncomfortably, guilt written all over his face.
"Nate can't know."
I freeze. I had forgot about my brother. Shit. I just fucked his best friend. Feeling Landon's eyes on me, I gather myself quickly and give him a bland look. "Know about what?"