I was currently six months pregnant and I was completely stressed. I was on edge every time that I had left the house and I was about to leave the house again as Harley and I was finally about to go see an ultrasound of our baby and finding out the sex. Yes, I was happy to be doing this but u were constantly looking over my shoulder. Ever since the incident with Jessica, things have been kind of crazy. Mr. Cannon had questioned Aron in jail to make sure that everything Jessica said was true and it was. He had taken it easy because she was helping him and the police to catch her cousin Bella and try to stop her before she did anything else. As far as my brother and Jessica they were no longer together, and he was taken it pretty hard especially since my mom was blaming him for not even seeing how shady Jessica was. We haven't talked since that day and it was secretly eating at me. Jordan and I hadn't even talked to clear the air and I know it was hurting her, but I was still mad at her. If you ask me, it was like I had cut everybody off and I was perfectly okay with it because I didn't need the stress even though I was stressing already. Everything that I was doing was starting to be a circle of mixed feelings and being fake. Harley's graduation party wasn't even all that because the family dynamic was off.
Entering the doctor's office, Harley helped me to sit up on the bed to lay back. It was hard for me to be here with Harley because I was still mad at him too. I didn't know if it was the pregnancy hormones or if it was the simple fact that he had a whole female that was absolutely crazy about him. I just felt like he should have been doing more to handle this situation now especially with me being pregnant. He just acts as if was normal to have this kind of drama over him and it was pissing me off. I wanted him to stand up for me and protect me, but I feel as if I'm not getting it. To make matters worse we weren't even seeing much of each other lately. He was always going somewhere with his dad and would not even tell me about it. It was suspicious to me but I let him be.
"Now, this is going to be cold." The nurse said as she rubbed cold gel on my huge stomach.
"If you look at the screen where you will see the baby."
Looking up to the screen, I got butterflies, I saw my baby for the first time and I began crying silently.
"Your baby is growing good and strong as it supposed to. Do you want to know the sex?" She asked looking at me. I looked towards Harley who was wiping his eyes trying to hide his tears but shook his head yes. The lady looked back at the screen as she moved along my stomach.
"Oh, there is a penis, looks like you guys are having a baby boy." She said happy for us.
Crying even harder it was like I couldn't control myself. I was in shock, I guess. In a couple of months, I was due to have a baby boy. I couldn't believe it.
Wiping off the excess gel on my stomach. Harley helped me down off the bed and hugged me long and hard. Being happy was an understatement for him. He kissed me over and over on the lips. Smiling through tears it was hard for me to be as happy as he was because I was starting to doubt how we would work as a family when my life was still being threatened.
"Okay, Harley. Please let me fix myself." Holding on to him for support as I pulled my shirt down and gained my balance.
"Sorry baby I'm just so happy. I told you that we were going to have a boy." He helped me out the door leaving the doctor's office to go get the sonogram pictures of our son.
"I'm happy to baby."
Receiving our pictures we were on our way to the house and the car ride Harley talked about everything that he wanted to do with his son in the future. He was going on and on. While I was sitting there stuck on how my boyfriend was causing me so much pain when it came to his ex. I love him so much but my mind was really playing mind games on me. Making me wonder was he worth having the baby with when it came to all this drama.
Feeling a hand on my thigh. I looked over at Harley with a look of worry on his face.
"Baby I really need you to talk to me before we go into this house." He said as we parked in the driveway.
"I see how you fake being happy around me. You barely talk to me since that incident with Jessica. You don't even let me touch you anymore unless I'm helping you with something. I know that I haven't been around lately and I had a good reason for that. But I miss you and not opening up to me is killing me. We have a baby on the way and I feel like I'm the only one that's excited about it." He sat back and breathe deeply.
Looking at him, I knew that everything he said was true.
"Harley ever since that incident, I just don't feel good about us anymore. If I'm being honest I am happy about having a baby but sometimes I just don't know if I'm happy it's yours because once again my safety in jeopardy. I'm constantly looking over my shoulder and worried something bad is going to happen." I looked down in my lap because I didn't want him to see me crying but I knew what I just said was harsh as hell.
The car was silent for a good minute.
"Emily." He said as he rubbed his face.
Not looking at him I stared out the window.
"I don't know how else I can tell you sorry and many different ways but believe me when I say this. I didn't know that Bella was this crazy. I was a freshman in college thinking that I was in love. If I knew everything today back then I would have never gotten involved with her." He turned my face to face him.
"But I cant Emily. It's my past that I struggle with it as well but there is nothing that I can do to change it. You have got to accept it and stop holding it against me. Baby, I'm sorry for everything that had happened ever since I met you. There is not a day that I not wake up and wish for it all to end already but in a way, I'm glad this all has happened because If it hadn't I would have not have gotten to meet the love of my life who is blessing me with my first child." He rubbed my stomach. "I want you in my life and I need you in my life because I love you. My child that you are caring inside you is a testament of our love and I want you to be proud of that. Not wishing that we hadn't created it together. Grabbing his chest he breathes out slowly. I'm hurt that this pregnancy has been stressful for you. I know that you've been through a lot but I promise you this mess will not last."
Looking out the window. I wanted to slap myself. Harley was right, I was holding his past against him and sabotaging a good thing that we have. Looking down at my stomach I cried hard.
"Baby, I just want you to be happy. I want you to really get it through your head that I love you and want nobody but you. You are my soul mate. I can't change my past or predict the future but I live in the moment and take it one day at a time with you, Nothing is perfect but please don't shut me out. Plus think of it like this. If you let Bella get to you even when I don't want her and she can't have me, she will have won because you let her put these thoughts in your head and doubt the good thing that we have together". He got out of the car and came over to the passenger side. Opening the door he reached out his arms to me.
Falling into his arms I cried out all of the pain that I was holding in over this whole incident. I was a mess but I knew that Harley was right. I needed to get myself together but at the very moment, Bella was winning. Looking up to Harley I was completely in love all over again as he flashed that smile and dimple at me.
"Baby, please forgive me for what I said about not knowing if I wanted to have a baby with you. I'm sorry. I have all these extra hormones and I just been feeling like everyone target lately." I said as I cried even harder in his chest.
"Baby, I forgive you. I know you been really sensitive lately. But this is our baby and I'm not going anywhere you hear me." He kissed my forehead.
"I know baby we are having a boy." I laughed as he both looked at my stomach.
It was at that moment that I knew I had to be strong because Bella would not break up my family, I simply was not going to allow it and I need to start acting like it.
Kissing Harley, he squeezed my ass hard.
"Man, I been waiting to do that for a minute. You have been making a brother sick with not being able to touch you." He said with that devilish grin of his.
Grabbing his hand and walking towards the house, I knew just how to make it up to him and put off both of us.
"Well, you can come to do a lot more than touch me, baby." Walking into the house he knew just what I meant and I know we were going to be just fine.
After making it up to my boyfriend, I felt somewhat better as I knew I had to solve two more issues that were weighing me down. First I grabbed my cellphone as I watched Harley prepare to take a shower. I dialed the number to call Jordan.
"Hello." She answered with worry in her voice.
"Hey Jordan, I want to say I'm sorry that I've been holding a grudge with you. I shouldn't have blamed you for Jasmine's deceit. I miss you and I hope you can forgive me." I said giving a deep breath over the phone.
"It's okay Em. I should have figured it out sooner. You had every right to feel mad with all of us, plus you are pregnant so I know that emotions were running extra high." She said sincerely.
"Yeah. They are with everybody but I have to do better by not lashing out at people." Feeling bad about the way I've treating her and ignoring her.
"It's fine and you can make it all up to me by doing one thing." She said happier seeming to be in a better mood.
"What is that?" I asked already knowing what she was going to say. Smiling at the phone.
"Well, tell me that you are having a boy! I know that you guys were going to find out the gender today." She said excitedly.
"Well," I said dragging it out making her wait.
"Come on now spit it out." She shrieked into the phone.
"Yes, we are having a baby boy!" I screamed rubbing my belly. All I could hear through the phone was Jordan screaming in excitement. Overjoyed I just knew she was probably running around in circles from excitement. After all, she going to be the baby godmother, she just didn't know it yet.
"Hey look, I got some things to handle so ill text you later okay," I said to her as Harley stood in the bathroom door looking at me smiling.
"Okay girl."
Hanging up the phone. I looked towards him anxiously.
"Harley."
"Yes." He said coming over to me and sitting down by me putting on his shoes.
"I need you to go with me and I need to go and mend things with my brother."
"That's fine, Let me know when you're ready. I'll text him and see where he is."
It was two hours later and Harley and I were riding in an unfamiliar neighbor that was similar to my grandma's neighborhood. I grew mad and frustrated because Harley had told me that Trey didn't want to see me today and I simply wasn't having it. I needed to speak to him. He was my only brother and I refused to let him feel bad over the incident. We pulled up to a nice looking house and I could see trey's car in the driveway. As I was about to hop out, Harley grabbed my arm.
"Emily, I really think that we need to come back another time. Trey said that this isn't a good time." He said with a worried look on his face.
"Harley are you serious right now? We are already here." I laughed at him like he was crazy.
"If you don't want to stay ill just let Trey bring me home," I said getting out of the car.
"No, I think I better stay for this." He looked more worried as he got out of the car.
I looked at him as he was being dramatic. Walking up to the front door I knocked.
Trey opened the door with a shocked look on his face.
"Harley, I told you not to bring her here." He said stressed as he looked past us to the driveway.
Looking over my shoulder I didn't see anything. Pushing past him. I walked into the house with my arms crossed.
"Look man, She not very good at listening to anyone since being pregnant. I tried my best." He said as he closed the door.
"Trey look I know that you are mad at me. I'm sorry for how mom scolded you and blamed you for this whole ordeal. But your my brother and I don't blame I just want you to know that I'm sorry." I said as I sat down on the couch which felt like heaven. My back was killing me.
"Emily, I was never mad over anything, just mad that I was dating someone who had such harsh feelings towards my own sister. I was mad because I didn't see it myself." He said as he sat down beside me.
"Well, I don't want to feel like that either. I'm sorry about everything and I should have said all of this sooner. I know that you and mom have been going through it lately and it's all because of me." I said crying.
Trey hugged me. "Emily its really had nothing to do with you. I mean she was mad at me but she's mad at me for something else."
"Well, what can I do to help?"
"Nothing it's something that she is going have to get over own her own." He said mad.
"What do you mean by that?" I turned my head as I saw the front door open up and it was a man that looked just like Trey. He was taller and muscular, but they were a spitting image of each other. Trey jumped up as if he had seen a ghost.
"Trey, I have told you about leaving this door unlocked and you didn't tell me that you were having company over." The man said in a stern look that seemed to melt away as soon as he saw me.
"I'm sorry," Trey said as he ran over to the man as he caught the bags that were about to drop from his hand. The man was frozen for some reason and looked completely shocked. He never took his eyes off me. All the color had left his face.
"Trey is he okay?" I said standing up as Harley grabbed my hand tight for some reason. I looked at him funny then back to the man. Who was now sliding down the door as he was about to pass out? Rushing over to him, I grabbed his hand.
"Sir are you okay?" I said as kneeled down beside him as Harley was hovering over me.
"Emily, I need to talk to you," Trey said stuttering.
"Trey, you can talk but we need to help this man," I said looking at him breathing irregularly.
"Emily! The man said to me." Curious I looked back at Trey.
"How does he know my name?" Who looked scared.
The man grabbed my hand and said my name again with tears in his eyes. From looking at this man I was getting uncomfortable. I snatched my hand back and got Harley to help me up. Trey had tears in his eyes and the man was crying uncontrollably now. Confused I looked to Harley who held my hand.
"Baby just stay calm." He said as he brought me over to Trey.
Trey then grabbed my hands and stood directly in from of me.
"Emily, I need you to hear me." Looking at the man who was still crying on the ground. "Emily this is our dad. This is Tremaine." Trey said as he helped me kneel down. I immediately hugged the man and he held me as if I wasn't a complete stranger. The emotions were extremely high, and I could not believe the man who I hugged was my father. He kept saying my name as he held me tight. One thing I felt was a relief because this was apart of me that needed healing, I just didn't know that I would be blindsided by it.
My eyes widen as tears filled them. I looked at Trey and shook my head in disbelief.
After getting our emotions together everyone had a seat. My dad sat beside me and never let go of my hand.
Still, in shock, I was amazed by how much Trey and our dad looked a lot. Just like I looked like our mom.
"I just want to start off by saying to you that I'm so sorry that I didn't more to find you, baby girl."
"You have no idea the guilt that I've carried with me over the years. Just wishing that I could have done better by you." Tremaine said whole heartily.
"It's okay. I know the story and it was all because of mom. I don't blame you."
"I just hate she tried so hard to break us up. She even told you that I was dead." I said as I shook my head.
"Yes, that's was extremely difficult to believe especially after hearing the truth from Trey as well about how she trying to keep him from me as well."
I looked over at Trey who smiles at me through sad eyes. I now knew the problems that he and mom were now having and why he didn't want me to come over.
I mouthed it's okay. to him. And smiled because I knew it was hard for him.
Looking at my dad. I had to admit he was handsome and did not look a day over 25. I could see why our mom was crazy about him before the drugs and the death of grandpa.
Squeezing my hand. I snapped out of my thoughts. I want to be in your life, and I refuse to take no for an answer. He said smiling.
I shook my head yes. I wanted to know everything about him and see exactly what he was all about.
"Nothing would make me happier." He then touched my stomach.
"I am guessing that I'm going to be a grandpa too huh." He asked looking over to Harley with a stern yet playful look.
I walked over and grabbed Harley's hand.
"Yes, you are. This is my boyfriend and baby's father Harley. I love him and he's really good to me." I said smiling.
"Well, I've heard of him through Trey and I'll be getting to know him too. I wouldn't have it any other way for my baby girl to be treated like the princess she is." He said reaching to shake Harley's hand.
"Nice to meet you, sir. And I can assure you that I love your daughter and she is in good hands." He said rubbing my stomach.
"What are you having?" Trey asked.
"It's a boy!" Harley said and hugged his friend Trey excitedly.
Smiling like everyone else I just knew that this was much needed, and I was ready to be able to have my real dad in my life.