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Cold morning light filtered in through the large windows, its piercing intensity stirring Lily from sleep. Her eyelids fluttered automatically, but she kept them closed against the brightness and snuggled her face closer to the skin of James' chest, feeling his arm tighten around her slightly as he responded to her touch even as he slept. She felt the calm rise and fall of his chest under her head, felt the steady beat of his heart against her ear and her lips curved upwards into a smile.
Keeping her eyes closed, she moved her hand up alongside her face so it was resting on his chest, and she used her index and middle fingers to tap along with his heart rate. He shifted alongside her, pressing a kiss into her hair, and she felt his free hand run up her thigh and come to rest on her hip. She tilted her head back and opened her eyes; they immediately found his, sleepy and only half-open, but still sparkling, as they always did when they looked at her.
'Morning.' He whispered groggily, stretching his legs out but maintaining his grip on her.
'Hmmm.' It was about all she could manage in reply, somewhere between a word and a groan, as she closed her eyes again and rolled her body a little to allow her to turn her face further into his upper body. She felt him laugh quietly, felt it rumble through his chest and she swatted him lightly in reproach. Remembering that they were in bed together in Potter Manor she felt a faint stirring of anxiety begin to churn in her stomach, but it wasn't quite able to break through the haze of sleepy contentment she currently found herself in.
'What time is it?' she mumbled sleepily, her face still pressed up close to him, his scent filling her nostrils and fogging up her mind, his skin muffling her words.
'I don't know.' She felt the muscles in his neck tense as he turned his head to look at the clock and then his hand left her hip as he began to grope around for something. 'Where did you chuck my glasses Lil?'
'Bedside table somewhere.' She waved a hand vaguely and then felt her body being pulled with his as he reached for them.
'It's just after nine.' His voice sounded clearer now, his hand beginning to rub gentle strokes up and down her side, and he smiled as she groaned at him.
'Don't, you'll send me back to sleep and I have to get up before someone decides to come in here and finds us.' Lily raised a hand to rub her eyes in an attempt to wake up properly.
'You don't need to get up.' answered James, not pausing for a second in his stroking. She opened her eyes again and moved her head to look at him questioningly, and he smiled at the sight of her, all curled up and sleepy, and he couldn't resist leaning down to kiss her forehead. 'In case you've forgotten, we're in your room. So the problem isn't that you're in bed, it's that I'm in your bed. I'll get up and you can stay here for as long as you like.'
His hand left her side to smooth over her hair, tucking it behind her ears so he could see her face clearly. He kissed down from her temple, across her cheek and along her jaw line and his slight stubble tickled lightly as it ran across her skin and made her giggle. Then he slid himself out of bed and began hunting for his clothes.
Lily managed to open her eyes and watched him sleepily as he gathered his dress robes into a messy bundle. He sat next to her on the bed in just his trousers and bent down to kiss her again.
'I'm going to apparate straight to my room and hopefully avoid Padfoot. Do you want me to wake you for breakfast? It won't be for at least an hour or so, we're always a bit slow on New Year's Day.'
'I'm not surprised.' Lily stretched her arms above her head and yawned. 'That was some party Potter.'
'Yeah, your dad thought so.'
Lily smiled at the memory of James and her father sat together. She wondered if she could get James to spill what they'd been talking about. She'd have to try that later.
'If you wouldn't mind then. I could use some breakfast. Especially if there's omelettes.' She closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around the pillow he'd been using, burying her face in it, completely unable to stay awake any longer. As she drifted back to sleep, she felt him run a hand through her hair again and she only vaguely registered the last thing he said.
'If there isn't, love, I'll make you one myself.'
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That extra hour of sleep had been just what she needed, Lily decided as she bounced down the stairs towards the main floor. That and the wonderful, incredibly hot shower. She felt refreshed, happier with life than anyone had a right to be, and was positively bursting with energy.
'Someone's chirpy.' Marlene caught up with her and linked their arms. Lily threw her a dazzling smile then -completely overcome with a rush of affection for her best friend - threw her arms around her in an exuberant hug.
'Okay, make that someone's incredibly chirpy.' Marly sounded both surprised and amused at Lily's sudden show of fondness; she knew she wasn't usually quite so openly affectionate, but today just felt like a day for hugging your friends. 'What's boiling your potion this morning?'
'Oh, you know. Great party, breakfast is waiting, all my friends are here, Petunia's not...'
'James is here.' finished Marly with a smirk. Lily felt a goofy grin spread across her face as she re-linked her arm through Marlene's and began to tug her down the stairs. 'Lily Evans, are you blushing?'
Lily ducked her head down and tried to hide behind her hair, because she knew Marlene was right and a blush was spreading its way across her cheeks. Never one to be put off, Marly let go of her arm and bounded a step or two past her before turning to face her again.
'You are! Why does the mention of your boyfriend's name make you go bright red?' Lily felt her cheeks flush even redder, and Marlene's face was stretched into a grin. 'Why, Lily Evans, what have you been up to?'
'I've no idea what you're talking about. Breakfast's waiting.' Lily rushed down the stairs past her, and Marlene turned and followed.
'I'm going to find out - you know you can't keep secrets from me dancing queen!'
Lily came to a shocked stop and whirled to face her friend, the memory of that particular birthday celebration making her face burn even hotter. 'You promised never to tell anyone about that!'
'If you don't spill, I'm going to tell the whole school about that and ruin your reputation forever!'
'You wouldn't!'
'Wouldn't I?' Marlene offered her a wicked grin. 'You don't have to give me details Lil - though I certainly wouldn't object.' Lily gave her an appalled look. 'Come on; just give me the general gist. I'm your best friend.' She gave Lily her very best pouty face - which she had polished to perfection, since it worked so well on Sirius - and Lily felt herself caving under the onslaught.
'I can't believe we're having this discussion at all, and I really can't believe we're having it here, in a hallway, in James' parent's house.' Lily groaned, horrified by the direction her previously fantastic morning had suddenly taken.
'Well, if location is your objection...' Marlene grabbed Lily' arm and pushed her - none too gently - through the nearest door, which happened to be the family sitting room, swinging it shut behind them and adding locking and silencing charms for good measure.
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When Lily entered the kitchen, arm in arm with Marlene, James felt his face melt into what he knew was a particularly gooey smile. Ignoring the disgusted look he got from Sirius, he stood up to hug her, linking his arms round her waist and burying his face in her hair.
'Morning.'
'Morning.' Lily whispered back, wondering why they were whispering if they were pretending this was the first time they'd seen each other today. Her thoughts were interrupted by Sirius throwing pieces of toast at them.
'Oi, you two! Do I need to get a bucket of water or what?'
'Seems more appropriate for you than me Padfoot.' James mumbled into Lily' hair, only just loud enough for everyone else to hear. He felt Lily try to suppress a giggle as she caught the obvious reference to Sirius' animagus form. He kissed her forehead and let go of her, painfully aware of his mother's eyes burning holes in the back of his head. They turned back to sit down, and Marlene grinned wickedly at James.
'Morning Potter. Did you know your girlfriend blushes whenever someone mentions your name?'
'Marlene!' Lily hissed at her. James looked at the two of them, his confusion clearing slightly as he observed Lily's complete embarrassment and Marlene's evident glee. Girl talk had obviously happened. Putting all thought of Lily and Marlene discussing, well that, out of his mind - the less he knew about it, the better as far as he was concerned - he shot her a cocky grin before answering.
'All girls do that Marls, haven't you noticed? It's my overpowering, supreme sexiness.'
This statement resulted in several wolf whistles, a barrage of abuse regarding his appearance and several breakfast items being thrown at him, but he couldn't bring himself to care when he caught Lily's relieved expression and her quickly mouthed thank you for deflecting the attention away from her.
'I hope you lot are going to get all of the tasteless humour out of your systems this morning, because I expect best behaviour when Lily's parents are here this evening.' Dorea Potter spoke sternly from her position behind the kitchen counter, one hand on her hip and the other gesturing a wooden spoon threateningly in Sirius' direction.
Lily twisted in her seat to face James' mother. 'My parents?' she asked, mystified by Dorea's statement.
Dorea lowered her wooden spoon as she turned her attention away from Sirius and she smiled fondly at Lily. 'I hope you don't mind dear, but we enjoyed meeting your parents so much yesterday we invited your family for New Year's Day dinner this evening. It's another Potter tradition, a quiet meal after the ball the night before, and you're practically family now after all.'
'There's that blush again.' commented Marlene, observing the colour rising in Lily's face at Dorea's words.
'Oh hush Marlene, stop trying to embarrass the girl. A tendency to blush is the curse of the redhead.' She aimed a wink at Lily. 'Worth it to have hair that fabulous though.'
Lily felt her face relax into a smile and she caught James' eye for the first time since his mother had started speaking; she was pleased to note that he looked just as appalled as she felt at this parental interference, and they both started to laugh at their near-identical dismayed facial expressions.
At that exact moment, Charlus Potter swept into the kitchen, boundless energy and enthusiasm radiating off him as normal, despite the long day yesterday.
'Dorea, your handwriting is atrocious, I have no idea what this actually said, so I guessed. If I've done everything wrong, it's entirely your fault...' he trailed off as he caught sight of Lily sat at the breakfast table.
'Lily!' He boomed, sweeping her out of her chair and into an enormous hug. Out of the corner of her eye she saw James' head land on the table as the second of his parents proceeded to terrify Lily with sheer over-affection.
'Someone was sleepy this morning, you're the only one I didn't see before I went out to perform my duties for Herr Commandant here.' He jerked a thumb over his shoulder in the direction of his wife before pulling Lily in close again and dropping a fatherly kiss onto her cheek. 'Happy New Year sweetheart!' He pulled back from her slightly to look at her face. 'Did I say that last night? I can't remember if I saw you after midnight.'
'Well, there's a surprise.' Dorea's voice dripped sarcasm and almost everyone sat at the table tried and failed to suppress their grins. Pretty much all of them had seen Charlus' attempts to do the Hustle with Lenora Lovegood, so they were totally aware that he had been well and truly pissed; the absence of a hangover this morning was nothing short of a minor miracle.
'If you can't enjoy yourself at your own party, then what's the bloody point?' demanded Charlus indignantly. 'I can recall a few of your indiscretions Dor, I'm sure everyone would be interested in the time you lost your skirt in...'
'Charlus Potter, unless you want to be transfigured into a poodle you will shut your mouth this instant!' Dorea's voice became slightly shrill towards the end of her sentence as she blurted it out in one long breath in an attempt to shut her husband up. Charlus closed his mouth and mimed locking it and throwing away the key, and with as much dignity as she could possibly muster, Dorea turned back to her cooking.
Charlus aimed a wink at his son, who was torn between being amused at his parents antics and being horrified at the display Lily was getting. She may have spent a bit of the summer with them, but they had both been at work a lot, and when they were home they were stressed or not in particularly good humour. She had never been subjected to the full force of Potter family banter, and he could only hope she wasn't too shocked by it.
Risking a glance in her direction, he saw a smile playing on the corner of her lips; it seemed she wasn't too put off by the obvious insanity in his genes.
'So what time are we expecting the Evanses this evening Dor?' Sirius asked affectionately. 'I think Lil's mum rather liked me, so I want to make sure I've got time to look my best.' He smirked at Lily who smiled sweetly back.
'I could always transfigure you into a horse; they're her favourite animal, and let's be honest they're much prettier than you.'
Remus let out a snort of laughter which earned him a smack on the back of the head from Sirius, whose plate promptly caught fire after a deft twitch of Remus' wand.
'Bloody hell!' Sirius attempted to pat the fire out with his hand to the general amusement of the rest of the table before Frank took pity on him and doused it with an aguamenti charm.
'Are you sure you're a wizard?' he asked, leaning his chair back on two legs, blue eyes twinkling while Alice had fits of giggles alongside him.
'All right you lot, eat your breakfast and sod off.' Dorea attempted to sound stern, but there was an unmistakable trace of suppressed laughter in her voice.
'Mum, I'm hurt. Anyone would think you don't want our company.' James spoke dramatically, clamping his hand to his heart as if in pain.
'I don't.' Dorea answered dryly. 'As you well know, I cook New Years Day dinner myself, by hand, and I do not need any of you wrecking the house because you're unsupervised while I'm in here, so you can all go get some fresh air.'
'What do you mean unsupervised?' Charlus sounded outraged. 'What am I, chopped liver?'
'When it comes to keeping an eye on this lot, you're as useful as a chocolate teapot.' Dorea stated calmly. 'Lily would do far better at keeping control of them than you. And you're going out as well; I'm not having you under my feet.'
'Well, where in the name of Merlin's pants am I supposed to be going since you're kicking me out of the house?' asked Charlus grumpily, ignoring the sniggers coming from both James and Sirius.
Dorea turned to smile at him. 'Well, last night you promised to go over to the Casterson's to listen to the Cannons versus the Wasps, so you'd better be going over there hadn't you?'
Charlus grimaced. 'I promised that? Bloody hell, that firewhiskey must have been stronger than I thought.'
'Well it definitely had an effect on Lily's decision making.' Marlene muttered under her breath; Lily choked on her juice and James aimed a kick at Marlene under the table, missed entirely and ended up kicking Frank's chair over backwards. Frank knocked his breakfast into Alice's lap as he fell, she screeched as her skirt was plastered in ketchup and her wildly waving arms knocked over a teapot which began to empty its contents over the white tablecloth.
At that point Dorea lost her temper entirely and chased every last one of them from the kitchen, issuing dire threats about what would happen should they return without being specifically summoned by her.
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'Who's playing?' Sirius fell into step alongside James who was wandering along the path, idly tossing a quaffle into the air then catching it as it fell, using only his left hand. He'd had to jog a few steps to catch up with his best mate who had completely failed to hear him shouting from the broom store. He shifted the bundle of broomsticks under his arm, cursing under his breath as one jabbed him in the ribs.
'Not sure.' James answered, not taking his eyes from the spinning quaffle as he walked. 'Me and you, Marls and Pete I think. Remus is feeling a bit off-colour and Alice and Frank already left for his mum's. They said to say goodbye.'
'You missed someone out.' Sirius aimed a sideways glance at his obviously distracted friend, who snatched the quaffle from mid-air and turned his head to look at him. 'The lovely Lily not interested?'
James laughed and tucked the quaffle under his arm. 'Doubtful. Lily likes Quidditch, but I'm pretty sure she only likes to watch it. She's getting better at flying, but I can't imagine she'd like the...aggression. She flies to relax. Says it's soothing to be in that much open space.'
Sirius looked at the foolish grin that appeared on James' face as he thought about Lily and rolled his eyes in - mostly - mock exasperation. 'How can you possibly understand her so well in such a short period of time? Marls is still a complete mystery to me.'
'Intensive study Padfoot. Very intensive study.'
'Is that what you call it?' Muttered Sirius under his breath and James grinned at him.
'Makes you wonder what my grades would be like if I gave school that much focus, huh?'
'Why don't you try it?' Sirius gave a short laugh. It always reminded James of his bark in his other form. 'If nothing else, it would give McGonagall the shock of her life.'
'Nah. Not worth putting that much effort into something you're not that bothered about.' James had his other hand tucked in his pocket where he was absent-mindedly rolling his wand between thumb and forefinger. Sirius looked at him and phrased his next sentence carefully, well aware of his best mate's tendency to hex first, think later.
'Was she worth the effort?' He raised his free hand to deflect any anger as James' head snapped round and his eyes narrowed. 'Don't kill me, I'm just interested. I mean, you spent so long chasing her, built her up so much in your mind, I'm just wondering if, in the end, it was worth all the jinxes she hit you with, all the rude names she called you.' He tucked his hand in his pocket and waited for an answer from the boy who had become his brother.
'Was Lils worth it?' James' eyes turned away from Sirius and stared off into the distance for a moment, and Sirius knew he was mentally reliving all the fights and curses and rows that had characterised his relationship with Lily for so long. When he turned his head back to make eye contact with his best friend there wasn't even the shadow of a doubt skulking in his eyes. 'Worth every second.'
'Huh.' Sirius was quiet for a few moments, pondering the implications of James' words and wondering how anyone could be that certain of anything, and the two of them continued to walk towards the open field on the grounds that they used as a makeshift Quidditch pitch. He caught sight of the rest of their friends gathered in a group waiting for them and Lily's flaming red hair caught the light and shone as she stood up and pounced on Marlene, tickling the blonde mercilessly. He couldn't help but smile at the cheerfulness of the scene; every now and then it was nice to be reminded that some things were just incredibly right with the world, especially when sometimes it felt like things were so very wrong and ready to collapse around your ears at any point, like the life you'd built was based on shaky foundations, ready to crumble if tested. When your world was tearing itself apart, dividing along arbitrary lines, pitting your adoptive family against your blood. When your relatives were probably responsible for the murder of your girlfriend's family.
Refusing to allow his thoughts to dwell on such morbid thoughts - grimmer days might be on the cards for the future, but they weren't here yet - he started to speak again, another curiosity rising to the forefront of his mind.
'So. You weren't in your room last night.'
'What?' James stopped dead in his tracks, his fist tightening on his wand, the quaffle dropping from under his arm as he lost his grip entirely. 'What are you on about?'
'I went into your room to get an anti-vomiting draught last night, and you weren't there and your bed was still made. So, I put two and two together, came up with you shagging Lily, and now I'm curious about how close to the mark I was. But I think the fact that your neck and ears have turned bright red tells me it was a bulls-eye.'
James stooped to pick up the quaffle, and to give himself a moment to consider the best course of action to take. He straightened back up and turned to Sirius with a resigned sigh. 'Is there anything I can say or do to stop you from winding her up about this?'
'Nope.' Sirius reached out and clapped his best mate on the shoulder. 'Because I have no intention of even mentioning it to her. Just wanted to know what's going on with you.'
James stood still for a moment, completely shocked and then he shook his head and laughed at his best friend. 'You just had to be a total arse to me though didn't you? Honestly, I reckon you like Lils better than me these days.'
'Well, she's prettier, smarter and she smells better. What's not to prefer?' Sirius smirked at James' quick snort of laughter and then his face became more serious. 'Really though mate, there's something I actually wanted to talk to you about. You know, seriously.'
James quirked an eyebrow, inviting him to continue, so Sirius carried on, trying to tell himself that it didn't count as prying if you were doing it because you cared. 'I know you two have been keeping things under wraps, and I get that, our Lily likes her privacy. But a lot of people saw you two at the party last night, and a fair number of them have kids at Hogwarts. There's going to be plenty of gossip when you get back, and you might want to talk about what you want to do about that before school starts up again. You don't want her to be blindsided, because I don't know how well she'd handle that.'
Sirius kept his eyes fixed on James during this little speech; he wanted to be sure that James was hearing what he was trying to tell him. He'd put far too much time and effort into banging their heads together - metaphorically speaking of course - to watch them fall apart because of minor, easy-to-overcome difficulties. James' eyes stared past him, over to where Lily was sitting, laughing with Peter as he conjured butterflies to circle round her head. 'I get it. Thanks Padfoot.'
'Anytime.'
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'Want to take a walk Remus?'
Remus opened his eyes to see Lily standing over him, her figure blocking the harsh winter sunlight from his eyes. Behind her he could see the outlines of their friends as they played and his overly-sensitive hearing could make out every word they called to each other. He sat up and gave Lily an affectionate smile.
'Sure.'
She stretched down a hand to pull him up, and he took it, more grateful to her than he could ever properly express for such a simple gesture. Even now he found it difficult to comprehend how long Lily had faithfully kept his secret without so much as mentioning it, and he felt an enormous surge of warmth towards her as he remembered her unfaltering friendship despite her knowledge of his...condition. He brushed himself off as he stood and he gestured for her to lead the way. When she looked around, clearly at a bit of a loss, he smiled gently at her. Even when you were fairly used to it, Potter Manor could still be a little intimidating.
'Dorea's favourite garden is this way.' He offered her his arm and when she took it he led her along a path that curved back towards the rear of the house, away from the rowdy improvised game of Quidditch which was temporarily stopped while Marlene accused Sirius of cheating. Her knowledge of swear words really was quite wide-ranging.
Lily leaned into him as they walked and Remus glanced down at her, observing the slight smile playing continually across her features; the happy upward curve at the corner of her lips, the little crinkle at the corner of her eyes. He'd rarely seen her more cheerful than today.
'Someone seems happy.' He commented, reaching his free hand over to squeeze the one she had looped through his arm.
'I am.' She had to tilt her head back to make eye contact with him; she was used to craning to look at James by now, but Remus was even taller. He didn't have James' build though; he was tall and lean, verging on skinny when the full moon was near. The thought made her smile waver just for a second. 'Aren't you going to ask me why?'
'No.' Succinct as usual. Remus never was one to waste words.
'Really? I think everyone else has asked me today, directly or indirectly. Not even a flicker of curiosity there Remus?' Lily teased him gently, and he felt his lips twitch slightly.
'I don't care why my friends are happy Lil, only that they are.' He gave up on trying to keep a straight face and let his smile grow. 'I could hazard a few - probably quite accurate - guesses as to what has put such a grin on your face, but why would I? You're happy and that's what matters.'
Lily rested her head back against his arm. 'You might just be the best man I know Remus. And that's saying a lot, since I know James.'
Remus smile grew even wider. 'Never thought I'd hear the day Lily Evans would be saying that.'
'I know. It's still pretty shocking to me sometimes.' Lily let a giggle break out as they strolled along the garden path in the cold of the January sunshine. 'If my fourth or fifth year self could see me now!'
Remus laughed along with her for a minute and then they both fell silent for a few moments, remembering the days when Lily Evans and James Potter did nothing but fight and argue and hex. It seemed obvious to both of them now that there had always been more than just anger and resentment and antagonism behind those adolescent rows, if Lily had only been willing to admit it. Neither of them had ever directed similar levels of frustration or passion towards anyone else no matter what the provocation and James, it seemed, had been right all along - Lily was fighting a lost cause. The reality of it was, despite Severus, despite everything, she'd given in to James a long time ago, and everything that had come since had been the actions of a nervous and confused girl trying desperately to fight a battle she'd already lost, and trying to pretend to herself that she could win.
She spoke again, softly now, as her mind whirled through the memories, all the moments that she'd lived through that had led her to the truth of the matter - that James Potter had her, heart, body and soul, whether either of them knew it or not. Some of the memories were good, some bad, but all led here, towards James and whatever came next.
'Honestly though, I feel guilty now about the hard time I used to give all four of you. Well, you less than the others. But still, it took me a long time to realise what good people all of you are and I guess I'm the one that missed out in the end. I could have had so much more time with James, with all of you if I'd just been a bit less rigid.'
'Oh, I think we gave you plenty of reason.' Remus mused. 'And you were right about a lot of things. We all had a bit of growing up to do. Just think how unbearable fifth-year James would have been if you'd actually gone out with him!' Remus pulled a face. 'I don't think you'd have put up with him for long.'
'Maybe you're right. Maybe each of us had to become the people we were supposed to be first.' Lily reached a hand out to touch the beautiful crimson flowers of a shrub they were passing, and Remus paused for a moment to pick one for her.
'That's a little introspective for a day like today, don't you think?' He offered her the flower and she took it with a smile, wondering again why Remus didn't have a girlfriend when he was so naturally good at this kind of casual gesture that would make most girls melt. He was so much like James in that respect - affection was easy for them.
'You're probably right.' She tucked her arm back round his, twirling her flower between her fingers. 'You know, this is almost the exact colour of Julia's dress last night.' She peeked up at him from under her eyelashes, trying to observe without being observed. There was a very faint hint of colour in his cheeks and, suspicions rising, Lily continued.
'It was good to see her. I know you've been spending a lot of time with her, but I don't get to talk with her very often. She's nice. Funny.'
'She is. She's funny, she's clever, she's beautiful.' Remus answered quietly, careful not to look at Lily as he spoke. He knew where she was going with this, and he also knew she wouldn't outright ask, nor would she try to manipulate or force answers. Something in him wanted to purge though, so he continued speaking.
'She's lovely. I'm a werewolf.' Saying it was oddly cathartic; there was a strange sense of relief in knowing that you'd spoken your troubles out loud to a sympathetic soul.
Lily pulled away from him slightly and tilted her head back to look at him. She could see the mixture of shame and sorrow on his face and her heart ached for him, one of James' oldest and truest friends, one of the kindest, nicest people she'd ever known. 'I fail to see how those two statements connect Remus.'
'Come on Lily. You know, and I know, that I can't get involved with someone no matter how much I'd like to. It's not fair to lie to somebody all the time, and I can't risk the truth.'
'Maybe you can. Didn't you tell James to take that risk with me?' Lily stopped walking and tugged Remus' arm so he stopped with her. They stood on the path facing each other, Remus looking at a point somewhere above Lily's head and keeping his face carefully neutral, his arms folding themselves in a defensive gesture used so often it had become automatic.
'I did.' Remus's shoulders sagged slightly as he lowered his gaze to meet hers and some of the resistance and hard-edged defensiveness he'd used as a shield for so long left him. 'But Lily, that was a far more calculated risk. I'd known you for so long I had a much better handle on how you'd respond. This...this would be a big risk.'
'Look, Remus.' Lily reached out a hand and placed it gently on his folded arms. 'I'm not saying you should just blurt it out to Julia next time you see her. I'm saying you shouldn't close yourself off to possibilities, because that's what I did for a long time.' She squeezed his arm gently. 'Just give yourself a chance. Go on a date. It's not quite the major issue you imagine it to be.'
She dropped her hand from his arms, then stood up on her tiptoes to press a kiss to his cheek, laughing slightly at the look of shock that passed over his face as his arms uncrossed and fell to his sides. 'See where it takes you, and make the decision when you have to, don't agonise so much now that you never give yourself a chance to be happy.'
She linked her arm through his and pulled him forwards again, happy that she'd at least gotten an opportunity to try to get through to him, even if it made no difference at all.
Remus allowed her to tug him into moving again, mulling over her words. As they circled back towards the ad hoc Quidditch pitch and the others came into view, he thought that it had been nice to hear that she had such a positive outlook on things these days, even though it didn't change anything. Not for him anyway.
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It was nice, thought Lily, to see her parents in her world again for a little while. She'd never really felt that they'd properly understood the differences between the magical and muggle worlds, and Petunia's presence had usually been enough to discourage any discussion or demonstration. She felt a surge of gratitude and affection towards James' parents for giving her this time with them, this opportunity to make them truly understand what she was.
'Lily sweetheart, want to give me the tour?'
Lily smiled at her mother across the parlour. 'I'm not sure I'm qualified mum, I still get lost. Wouldn't have a clue about the finer detail. Want me to ask James to take you around?'
'I've got a better idea.' James' deep voice came from behind her, and his hand placed itself gently on the small of her back. 'The three of us can go together. Then you can draw yourself a map Lil, might help with that directional problem.'
'Or you could make me one. You're good at maps.' Lily turned her head to one side so she could aim a smirk at him over her shoulder, watching him smile at their Marauder-based inside joke.
'I thought we'd agreed I was good at everything?' James planted a kiss on her angled cheek before looking back at her mother, offering her the full force of his smile. 'What do you say Mrs Evans? Would you like an expert tour guide to show your lovely self around?'
'Absolutely. And it's Rose, James, how many times?' Rose smiled and nodded approvingly as James held open the door and gestured for her and Lily to go first. As Rose left the room and Lily drew level with him she stopped and grabbed the front of his shirt.
'What is it with you and women? That's my mother, so stop flirting!' She hissed under her breath.
James released his shirt from her fist and straightened it up. 'First of all; that, my love, is innate charm and magnetism. Secondly, I'm not flirting, I'm merely being a gentleman. Got to win your mum over after all.'
James smiled at Lily's speechless rage and waved her through the door, pinching her backside as she went through and causing her to jump and squeal.
'Gentleman my arse.' She whispered furiously.
'And a fantastic one it is too.' James replied, completely unconcerned. 'Rose, did you know that Potter Manor is over four hundred years old?' And with that he went to offer his arm to Lily's mother and proceeded to embark on a charm offensive that included flattery, obsequiousness and general sycophancy to Lily's mind.
Half an hour later they'd done a loop of the main areas of the house, complete with numerous anecdotes of James' childhood, and Lily had concluded that her mother was officially in love. Really it was sickening; the way she laughed at every joke he spouted, the way she patted his arm when he told a soppy story. It shouldn't be possible for one man to charm his way through life with such ease.
As they approached the dining room where the others were gathering for dinner, Rose relinquished her grip on James and linked her arm through Lily's instead. 'Come with me darling, I need to powder my nose.'
Lily allowed herself to be dragged to one of the downstairs bathrooms and took the opportunity to use the full length mirror to straighten her dress. Her mother carefully re-applied lipstick and studied her daughter in the mirror before turning to look at her directly.
'Lily?'
'Yes mum?' Lily turned to face her, and Rose Evans felt a little burst of pleasure as she looked at her daughter, smiling and happy, at ease in her world. Still, there was a sting to that, knowing that her world was separate from theirs and always would be; it helped to know that she wasn't alone in it.
'I'm glad you have such good friends. I know it's been hard on you, that you feel isolated from us sometimes. I'm sorry for that.' She stepped towards her daughter and pulled her into a hug. 'But we love you sweetie, and we will always be here if you need us or want us.' She stepped back and held Lily at arm's length, studying her as if memorising every detail.
'Mum, are you okay?' Lily voice was concerned as she took in the slightly erratic behaviour of her mother.
'I'm fine.' Rose patted Lily's arm soothingly. 'I just can't believe how grown-up you are sometimes. It passes me by a little when you're away at school. And I know that you are going to be out of school soon, and I don't know what your plans are, but I know you aren't coming back to our world. And I'll miss you sweetie, but after the last two days I feel so much better knowing you have these people with you when I'm not there.'
'Mum.' Lily grabbed her mother's hands in hers and squeezed them hard. 'It's not like I'm going to cut you out of my life.'
'I know. I just won't be as much of a part of it anymore. And that's right, that's how it should be, but I'm so relieved that you'll have people to take care of you.'
Lily smiled and fought back the threat of tears, which was completely ridiculous, and she absolutely blamed James Potter for the upsurge in sentimentality she'd been experiencing today. Him and his bloody feelings.
Rose sniffed a little and gave a slightly teary-eyed smile. 'And thinking along that line...marry that boy.'
'Excuse me?' Lily dropped her mother's hands out of sheer shock.
'I mean it Lily. He'll always look after you. And frankly, either you marry him, or I adopt him because I'm determined to keep him.' Rose patted her daughter's cheek fondly and swept out, leaving her shell-shocked. She recovered herself and stumbled out into the hallway just in time to collide with Peter who grabbed her arm to steady her.
'Whoa. Alright there Lily?'
'Fine. Fine. I'm fine.' Lily blinked several times before she focused on Peter properly. 'Actually I'm not. My mother is certifiable.'
'You should try mine.' He laughed loudly, then sobered as he took in her face. 'Sorry. Er...should I ask what's happened or would that be prying?'
That got a smile from Lily. 'My mother just told me to marry James.'
'Well, I don't know why you think that makes her mad. I think you should marry James. We all think you should marry James. And I'd just like to say that I'd make a much better best man than Sirius, because I've heard his speech, and it's dreadful.'
'He's written a speech?' Lily's voice sounded weak, and she was sure her legs were buckling. She was sure her system just wasn't up to too many more of these shocks.
'You know Padfoot, he's an enthusiast.' Peter took note of Lily's paling face and began to drag her towards the dining room. 'Come on, you look like you need to sit down.'
Lily allowed herself to be gently tugged along the hallway. As she listened to Peter amusedly outlining the basic gist of Sirius' potential best man speech, she felt a stirring of curiosity; it was obviously her day to be nosy. 'How's your love life Pete?'
He shot her an amused look over his shoulder. 'Just rosy thanks. I prefer a quieter, less dramatic approach than my friends seem to favour. And a much more casual one. I'm going to meet Chrissie in Diagon Alley for a date tomorrow.'
'Chrissie?' Lily had to think for a moment before she could recognise the name. 'Christina Wellbeck? From Hufflepuff?'
'That's the one. Do me a favour and keep it to yourself, I really don't need any more advice from Padfoot. Or James for that matter. One's a deviant and the other's a hopeless romantic.' He grinned at her. 'But I'm sure you appreciate his tendency for overblown gestures. Nice bracelet.' He nodded towards the charm bracelet which was still on her wrist, smirking at the blush that spread. At least there was a bit of colour back in her face.
They reached the dining room door and he held it open for her. She walked into the room, and felt whatever nerves had been bouncing in her stomach settle at the sight of James and Sirius using the cruet to illustrate the rules of Quidditch to her dad, Dorea demonstrating household spells for her mother and Remus and Marlene laughing over some shared joke.
It may have been a strange sort of family, but under the looming threat of war, it was good to know you had one. Some things were worth fighting to keep.
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