?mode=1&language=1&lim=&search=&utm_source=rss 抖阴社区 - Discover a World of Unlimited Stories https://static.wattpad.com/be/image/logo.gif?v=1758650624 ?mode=1&language=1&lim=&search=&utm_source=rss /1550634314-heads-or-hearts-the-jingle-in-the-hallway?utm_source=rss<b>jakesimpletonauthor / 5 pages</b><br/>He's 240 pounds of loose change. She's barely making rent. Together, they're priceless.He's 240 pounds of loose change. She's barely making rent. Together, they're priceless.

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]]>/1550600128-melt-my-heart-shimmer-and-a-slide?utm_source=rss<b>jakesimpletonauthor / 1 page</b><br/>In a crumbling mansion far from civilization, a man made entirely of butter lives in exile-cursed to melt if ever touched by love. Bastien LeBeurre is soft, golden, and doomed to a life of solitude... until she arrives. Eliza Vane, a beauty queen...In a crumbling mansion far from civilization, a man made entirely of butter lives in exile-cursed to melt if ever touched by love. Bastien LeBeurre is soft, golden, and doomed to a life of solitude... until she arrives. Eliza Vane, a beauty queen turned Botox addict, can't move her face-but behind the frozen facade is a woman desperate to feel anything. When her search for eternal youth leads her to the mysterious LeBeurre Manor, she finds more than peace and skincare. She finds him. He's afraid of heat. She's afraid of time. But when their worlds collide in a kiss that should never happen, passion becomes peril, and obsession turns deadly. Equal parts romantic, tragic, and absurdly delicious, Melt My Heart is a darkly comic tale of love, vanity, and what happens when emotions run hot... and faces don't.

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]]>/1550591757-life-stinks-but-in-a-good-way-a-prince-among-trash?utm_source=rss<b>jakesimpletonauthor / 6 pages</b><br/>She talks to a soda can. He talks to crime bosses. Somehow, it works. Vincent Moretti has it all-wealth, charm, and a blood-soaked family empire that practically runs the city. But when his sleek car breaks down in the worst part of town, he stum...She talks to a soda can. He talks to crime bosses. Somehow, it works. Vincent Moretti has it all-wealth, charm, and a blood-soaked family empire that practically runs the city. But when his sleek car breaks down in the worst part of town, he stumbles across something he never expected: a sarcastic, dumpster-dwelling girl arguing with a dented Sprite can. Meet Penny. She's broke, barefoot, and bold as hell. With nothing but her wit, her trash kingdom, and her emotionally supportive soda can, she's managed to survive the city's cold shoulder-and she's not looking for a handout from some designer-suit-wearing, mafia prince with a God complex. But Vincent keeps coming back. For the banter. For the burgers. For the way she sees straight through him like no one else ever has. As their worlds collide in a whirlwind of gunfire, glitter, and greasy tacos, Vincent and Penny must figure out if love can grow between danger and dumpsters-and if a mafia heir and a girl from the gutter can write their own kind of fairy tale.

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]]>/1550556386-rest-in-grease?utm_source=rss<b>jakesimpletonauthor / 2 pages</b><br/>Death was only the appetizer. Last Halloween, she killed me. My vegetarian ex-wife carved me up and sacrificed me to a grill god older than charcoal. Now she's living her best post-divorce life with her yoga boyfriend - while I clawed my way back...Death was only the appetizer. Last Halloween, she killed me. My vegetarian ex-wife carved me up and sacrificed me to a grill god older than charcoal. Now she's living her best post-divorce life with her yoga boyfriend - while I clawed my way back from the grave, smelling like mesquite and vengeance. I'm not the man I used to be. I'm something else. Something... slow-cooked. The grill that burned my body is calling me. Rebuilding itself. Whispering recipes no cookbook should contain. And I've got unfinished business: secrets buried in backyard soil, a dog who still knows my scent, and a taste for justice that can't be satisfied with tofu. She thought she got away with it. She thought the fire died. But I'm back - and this time, I am the smoke. In this darkly hilarious sequel to I Lost My High-End Barbecue to My Vegetarian Wife in the Divorce, the meat is cursed, the apron is haunted, and vengeance is best served flame-kissed and screaming.

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]]>/1550551151-grandma-ruined-myspace-the-glittery-beginning?utm_source=rss<b>jakesimpletonauthor / 1 page</b><br/>Never teach your grandmother how to use the internet unless you're emotionally and legally prepared to watch the world burn in 8-bit fire.Never teach your grandmother how to use the internet unless you're emotionally and legally prepared to watch the world burn in 8-bit fire.

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]]>/1550542945-my-vegetarian-wife-took-the-high-end-barbecue-in?utm_source=rss<b>jakesimpletonauthor / 2 pages</b><br/>She took the house. She took the dog. She even took the artisan spice rack. But the grill? The grill was sacred. When a bitter divorce leaves one man with nothing but his memories and a microwave, he can't stop obsessing over the one possession h...She took the house. She took the dog. She even took the artisan spice rack. But the grill? The grill was sacred. When a bitter divorce leaves one man with nothing but his memories and a microwave, he can't stop obsessing over the one possession he truly loved - his Weber Summit S-670, a six-burner temple of smoke and flame, now exiled to the backyard of his vegetarian ex-wife. She never so much as touched meat while they were married... so why does he keep seeing strange lights flickering from the grill at night? Why do neighbors whisper about disappearances, and why does the scent of roasted flesh still linger in the air? I Lost My High-End Barbecue to My Vegetarian Wife in the Divorce is a darkly hilarious, slow-burning descent into obsession, heartbreak, and the supernatural. A tale of meat, madness, and marriage gone monstrously wrong, this genre-bending novella will leave you laughing, shivering - and strangely hungry. Perfect for fans of dark comedy, horror with a twist, and anyone who's ever lost something that meant more than they care to admit.

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