Screw Us Over

"Jessica, it's amazing seeing you again with a smile all over your face. You look really amazing. Come on in, take your shoes off, and relax." My therapist instructed with a huge smile moving across her face so quick.

Now, I wonder how the hell she got so happy to see my ass. Usually when people see me, they roll their eyes and get annoyed. When my co-workers scuff and whisper to their work friends 'oh shit. There goes Jessica again', that's how I know it's going to be a great day. It makes me so happy know that my presence is so important that they point me out like that. Anybody with a brain should be scared if I walk in with a smile on my face.

She must not have a brain then. Maybe it's filled with notepad paper.

Anyway, I walked into the modern-themed office filled with blues, whites, and grays. My eyes scanned around the scene and landed on the walls with them widened in a bit of shock. New paintings scattered all over her dark cerulean walls...that weren't what I thought therapist hung up. Not for children's eyes at all.

"Alfio Martire? You know that erotic artist? Why's his work hanging on your walls? How is this even allowed? Aren't you supposed to have pictures of plants and beaches in here or some shit?"

"How do you know the artist? Wasn't expecting anyone to know about him," she answered as she sat down and prepped herself for our session.

So, what had happened was Mr. Sex-On-The-Subway appeared on my explore page on Instagram since I follow a ton of art pages on there. Surprisingly, Rena got me into the whole erotic artist thing and I haven't looked back.

Now that I think about it, why the hell is Rena following sex artists like that?

Anyway, he makes lovely realistic style kind of artwork. Sometimes, he makes me wish I was getting the goods in two-story art studio. Nothing but a sexy ass dream right now. Then again, maybe Mario can make that happen on a beach...

"Well, I'm do a little something something from time to time and get inspired from other artists. He's one of those artists that make me want to pick up a pencil or paintbrush just to say I did it. That's the first step, right? Isn't this out of your guidelines though? Are you allowed to have these up?"

Sitting down in her chair and getting comfortable for our session, she opened up with "It's my office, right? No children come in this office because I only work with adults. Is that a problem for you?"

Hell nah, it wasn't a problem. In fact, these paintings were a sight for sore eyes. From his illustrations of car adventures to sex scenes in different countries. Love making all around the world and more. Just two, or three, human beings connecting bodies without worrying about what other people think. Oh, how much I wish I had that much freedom. To come and go as I pleased.

Maybe that freedom was still locked away with the rest of my art things in the closet. What used to be the pathway to some kind of peace became a tunnel to aggravation and stress so it all got thrown in the closet, never to be pulled out again. Some of those things were probably damaged.

Well, I sat down while smiling at the artwork from the Italian illustrator as a rush of eagerness flourished through my body. Goodness gracious. Get it together, Jess.

"Alright, let's start off with how you've been since our last visit? I see you've been feeling much better since then."

Oh, I haven't even told her about Mario. To be honest, I didn't want to open up to anyone about my time with Mario because things weren't serious. I didn't want to open my mouth about him and things change later.

It's been a little over a month since that dance session and Mario's been seeing me. After he gave me his number, we spent hours on the phone together. After about a few days, we started doing small things together and I got the guts to move back into my own house again. Mario wondered why I let someone else scare me out of my own house.