Lost and Found (sequel to moving on)

Charlie POV

I left y/n's room, unable to comprehend the burst of emotions I just experienced. This whole time of being with y/n was supposed to feel like bliss, like I was finally complete. But I see now, that she was not the answer to what I needed. I always wanted a love that could fulfill my true desires, someone that would understand me. I found that love quite some time ago, but I know that I'll never get it back. He took that love away from me.

I walked down the small hallway of the cabin, approaching my office door. I took the key out of my pocket, jamming it into the lock. I unlocked the door, opening it and stepping into the room. I made sure to close and lock the door behind me, not wanting y/n to see the things in here.

I walked around the room, grazing my fingers over the frames and countless images amongst the walls. This room held all my memories, both good and bad. It seemed that these days my good memories have become negative, but I must stay strong. Not only for myself, but for y/n. I feel as though I'm losing myself to these memories, slowly drifting away into what had been.

I fixate my gaze on one photo in particular, my personal favorite in the room. It was a picture of me and my old friends, us being a bit younger. I looked so normal then. It feels wrong to see myself so happy and sane, but I long for that version of myself again. That day was possibly the best day of my life, everything was so perfect, until he had to ruin it.

-flashback-

"Charlie?" I turned around to see them standing there, a letter in their hands. I looked into their eyes, unsure of what emotion they were experiencing. "Th-This is for you."

"For me?" I looked at them with a smile, seeing a light blush on their cheeks.

"Yeah, but you can't open it until later, okay? You gotta be alone when you open it."

"I won't look at it till you guys go to bed, deal?" I put the envelope in my back pocket, holding out my hand jokingly for them to shake.

"Deal," they said with a small giggle. They took my hand in their's, causing my cheeks to burn up. We shared a handshake, but still had not let go after it was over. They looked up at me, a little flustered. I took my hand out of their's, dropping it at my side. I looked at them again, admiring their eyes. They were my favorite feature about them. The small green flecks were drowning in an ocean of blue, creating dimension in the irises. I felt like I could stare into the pools of green and blue forever, falling more and more in love with the person that possess them.

"Guys!" I turned around to see him approaching us. I sighed, not wanting the intimate moment to end. He came over to us, holding his camera. He had recently gotten a disposable one, trying to save all the memories we had with each other. "I got something for you two," he said pulling out two small necklaces, each with one half of a heart.

"But there's only two," they commented quietly. I looked at them, seeing they were a bit sad. "Are you trying to say you don't want us to be friends anymore? What about one for you?" Their voice was breaking, signaling that they were on the verge of tears. I immediately wrapped my arms around them, pulling their head into my chest.

"I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation as to why he only got the two, baby. I promise nothing bad is happening." I hadn't even realized I called them that until after I said it, slightly regretting my choice of words. I looked at him, trying to get some sort of explanation out of him before they started to cry.

"Hey, hey look. I only got two so you and Charlie can have something special, okay? Like how we have our bracelets." They turned to look at him while still in my arms, smiling weakly.

"A-Are you sure?" Their voice was still a bit broken, but not as severe as before. They were always nervous that someone would leave them, but recently it had gotten worse.

"I promise. I would never leave you dude," he said smiling.

"Okay," they said quietly. I let go of them, allowing them to take the items. They took both necklaces in their hands, putting one on themself. They walked over to me, standing on their toes to reach around my neck. "Thank you."

"Of course. Now let's get a picture, yeah?"

------

It had been a stressful day, having to deal with a constantly on-edge person the whole time. I loved them, don't get me wrong, but they were so messed up in the head. The poor thing could barely function without me or him, having no security within themself. I just want what's best for them, and I think I can provide that. I don't want them to suffer, but I don't want them to be so reliant on me.

"Charlie?" I heard a small voice from outside the door. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah, of course." The door opened, revealing them in their pajamas. They looked so adorable adorned in bright pink clothes, ones that contrast from their usual style of dressing.

"I have a question," they said nervously.

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, I just need to talk to you." They sat on the end of my bed, a few feet away from me. I got up and sat next to them, placing my arm around their shoulders. I took notice of the necklace still on them, smiling slightly.

"What's up," I asked popping the 'p.' ( HELL YEAH THE FIRST P POP OF THE NEW BOOK FUCK ALL OF THIS)

"I wanted to know why you called me uh, baby, earlier," they said getting quieter as they continued to speak. I tensed up a bit, blushing furiously.

"Oh, it was just an accident. Didn't really mean anything," I said casually. I couldn't risk them knowing.

"Oh, okay. Thanks for letting me know," they said quietly, immediately standing up and walking to the door. "Uh, have a good night. Oh! And the letter from earlier? It was just a silly thing you don't have to read that." I could tell they were getting tired, so I let them exit the room.

I had almost forgotten about the letter they wrote to me, so I decided now would be a good time to read it. Even if it was just some 'silly thing,' I was still interested in what they wanted to tell me.

I stood up off my bed, walking over to my pile of dirty laundry. I pulled the envelope out of the pocket, placing the item of clothing back on the pile.

I sat back down on my bed, opening the letter. It read:

'Charlie,

I have been meaning to tell you this for quite some time. I was unsure of how you would react to this, but I thought it was necessary to say. I know I can be very upfront with my feelings, but that's mostly because I don't know how to handle them. I'm not sure how to handle this one either, which is why I wanted to bring it up. These past couple of years have been the best of my life. Meeting you has been the best thing that's ever happened to me. You let me be myself around you, something I feel like I can't do around a lot of people. You're willing to risk it all for us, and I admire that so deeply. I know he doesn't like you as much, but I don't think he truly understands what I see in you. You have such a beautiful soul, Charlie. You're the reason I'm still okay, and I could never thank you enough. I know I can be really fragile and dependent on people, but I feel so much stronger when I'm with you. Sometimes he treats me like a child, but you treat me properly. Like a real person. Not like someone who is so fragile that you can't say anything to them out of fear they'll break down. You understand me, and I, you. When I was in my darkest times, you were there for me. You are there for me. You're the light of my life, Charlie, and for that, I am in love with you.

With Love,

Aiden <3

-end of flashback-

I didn't realize I had been crying until I felt the tears dripping on my hands, which were tightly grasped against the necklace secured to my neck.

I'll back to you someday, baby.

------

awkward.