My shifting tips and script

Obviously I can't just join the fbi as myself since I'd get folded by ep 1 😩

- (can't remember if I've said this SKDJJS) 22 yr old psychiatrist who has worked in most psychiatric fields and is an expert
- can aim and shoot a gun perfectly and knows how to use knives
- I'm allowed to wear what I want without getting in trouble because uniforms suck ass
- it's very hard to dislike me or want me gone from the team
- I have a high iq and have memorised all of the most famous serial killer cases

Backstory:

~ was working as a therapist for children and was pulled in to the bau to help with a case where children were being found dead and the unsub was a child in their class for a one time thing and after that kept in contact with a few of them and became their therapist (so I know the tea). A month or two later the bau needed a new agent on their team as requested by Strauss (she's ugly) and Hotch decided to bring me in. I have several phds in psychology, criminology, biology, English literature, art history and ancient civilisations due to being a child prodigy like Reid- just without his personality. I have an photographic memory and does well under pressure. ~

Relationships I want to have pre-set:

- On good terms with all of BAU
- Beef with Strauss but she can't do shit to me (ugly bitch)
- Good connections to information and authority due to my job
- Widely seen as a good person and a hero (like Rossi from his books) because of my books about psychology and talk shows I've been on to give advice

Appearance:

I can't be bothered with maintaining good skin and shaving while I'm hunting serial killers so I'll just ✨ not ✨

- eyebrows stay shaped
- body hair is non existent because I have no time to shave in my dr
- teeth stay white and they're straight because I'm not hunting killers with braces, embarrassing (sorry phelpstwinssupremacy
- hair doesn't get greasy or frizzy
- my skin doesn't break out and I barely sweat because if I have to run I might as well look good while doing it since running is also embarrassing
- if I get into a fight the marks leave quickly
- skin doesn't scar and I don't have a burn on my hand 😍 save that for my cr
- nobody notices this stuff because I have no idea what I'd say if someone pointed it out 😭

    "Skin shouldn't just not scar? And didn't you have a bruise yesterday?"

    "... no ❤️"

-  my muscles can't get sore or pulled and my bones don't break or fracture
- I can't roll my ankle. I'm not screaming at a killer that his dick is small, chasing him, about to shoot him, then rolling my ankle. Embarrassing.
- lips don't get crusty 😩 I'm white as Casper and British, you think my body could handle American heat?
- no sunburn and no wrinkles
- piercings can't be ripped out or hurt
- I have a conch and two helix piercings on my right ear and a daith and tragus on my left. Along with my lobes
- I have a septum and smiley piercing (don't come at me, they're actually cute) also I have a tongue piercing and bellybutton piercing.
- I have the moon phases tattooed down my back.
- I am 5'6 and have some muscle so I don't just die from one hit like I would rn

Might come back and change some bits later if I think of anything else but yeah ✨ ssa doctor smith let's go 😌😍