Breathe | Jensoo

Like everyone else, Jisoo and Jennie had differences: explosive versus suppressed, fierce versus patient, active versus passive.

Yet, at the same time, Jisoo and Jennie were the same kind of people -- hailed from troubled families and tattered childhoods, obsessed with work in hopes to forget, silent martyrs for whom they wanted to protect.

They could love others, but they couldn't be loved. They believed it was because of who they inherently were. But the truth was that it's because they didn't love themselves to begin with.

Yes, they were the same kind of people. They just didn't know it yet, because as sharp as they were about everything else, their own blind spot is themselves.

----------

Jisoo stared out the window from her desk, where she sat spinning a pen mindlessly. It was evening and the sky was streaked a purplish hue. The kids were having dinner in the hall, rendering the grass field and basketball court quiet. It was peaceful, unlike the gathering questions in her head.

Lisa has always teased that I've an allergy; could Jennie be right in her diagnosis of it? Am I actually averse to intimacy? But of what kind?

Jisoo shuffled through the hugs in her memory -- consoling hugs, joyous hugs, goodnight hugs, hi-bye hugs, et cetera -- and there hadn't been problems, not even when Jennie had hugged her that one surprising time in Seoul.

So what is my problem, exactly? Why did I react that way at the hotel? It's the first time that I-

No, it wasn't the first time she had reacted like that, she abruptly remembered. She scratched her nape and sighed at the memory from last summer.

Jisoo knocked on the open door, leaning against it as she watched Soojoo shuttle around the room. "Told you so, this is what procrastination looks like."

A sock flew her way and she moved her head to dodge it.

"Zip it, while I zip this up." Soojoo chided, with an easy smile and beads of perspiration on her forehead, as she sat atop her exploding luggage and fought with the zipper.

Jisoo grinned and plonked down on the other side of the straining luggage.

"Yes!" Soojoo cheered as the zipper smoothly fastened to about midway, where Jisoo took over and slid it all the way around. "Finally!" Soojoo laughed and leant her head back, resting it on Jisoo's shoulder.

Jisoo chuckled and shifted her weight backwards too, to counterbalance. They were back to back, and she could feel Soojoo's rhythmic expansion and contraction of lungs against her spine.

"Why do you leave everything to the last minute every single time?" Jisoo teased, lightly brushing aside strands of Soojoo's hair that were tickling her neck.

Soojoo laughed towards the ceiling, the valley of her nape curved perfectly around the peak of Jisoo's shoulder. The way she was always so carefree and wholehearted was captivating to Jisoo.

"Not my fault! If I don't have to leave, I won't have to pack."

"So whose fault is it that you're leaving, huh?"

"Life's." Soojoo's eyes disappeared behind her pretty smile.

"Ha ha, very funny." Jisoo chuckled and flicked Soojoo's forehead, eliciting a whine from her. "Come on now, let's get going."

They stood and while she lifted the luggage upright, she heard Soojoo ask, "Why don't you ever ask me to stay?"

She dusted her hands and shot Soojoo a bemused grin, "Because I know you wouldn't, silly. Min's school is top-notch in Seoul."