The worth of friendship

"This can't be happening. What's gotten into you Nick? What would you have done if someone else had seen you? You'd be in the tabloids in no time. A cheater, a two-timer, a heartbreaker. Our reunion would have been over before it even started! You're breaking Priyanka's heart. You're risking your marriage, man. You're engaged, dude! You're fucking engaged!" Joe roars as he paces up and down our hotel room. Nick sits on the desk chair with his head hanging low. I am sitting on the bed with Sophie. Sophie has an arm around me and strokes my upper arm gently.

" What about you Lia?" now Joe's, angry gaze falls on me, even though he looks at me a little more gently than at Nick. "You're going to risk your friendship with Nick? For something that's almost impossible? Nick is engaged, pumpkin! And you know it! No matter how happy I would be for you, this whole thing is super unrealistic. You're just gonna break yourself, sweetie! And I don't want to see you broken. I want to see you happy!", at his last words Joe smiles slightly, but immediately lapses back into his angry look. I avert my gaze from him and look sadly at my hands, which are intertwined in my lap.

Sophie lets go of me and stands up to put her hands on Joe's shoulders. She sways slightly as she does so. We've all had quite a bit to drink, and although the shock has sobered us all up, the alcohol is still in our blood. "Hun! You need to calm down. No one here wanted to destroy a career or break anyone's heart. The situation is super shitty but we need to stay calm." Sophie lightly massages Joe's tensed shoulders and you could see from his face how her words calm him down. But it doesn't last long as another thought pops into his head.

"Nick, dude what if someone took a picture of this man? Then you've fucking ruined everything. I was looking forward to a fresh start. I was looking forward to a new sister-in-law, I was looking forward to a nice wedding. Like you're gonna get married now when you've already cheated. I'm going crazy here. Me being drunk doesn't make the whole situation any better." Joe is in a total rage, having long since loosened himself from Sophie's grip and pacing frantically. "And I swear to you Nick. If you made Lia uncomfortable with this situation, then I'm going to make you uncomfortable. Then I don't give a damn about all this blood is thicker than water shit. I will always protect Lia. From everyone. Aaaah! I just can't believe it Nick." Totally desperate, Joe throws his hands in the air.

"What do you actually want from me Joe?", Nick yells and straightens up in the desk chair. I take a quick look at him. He looks furious. His muscles are tensed and his veins are pounding with anger. "You don't know what it's like. How it feels. My feelings are going crazy. Everything is going wrong. I don't know who I am anymore, what I want. I'm so fucking scared about the future!" Nick's voice is loud, he's gesticulating wildly and his hands are shaking with anger.

"Mister Perfect is scared of the future because for once everything isn't working out the way he wants. Great Nick. Perfectionism is always the perfect excuse for you. And for this you ruin our best friend?" Joe laughs spitefully and then glances sadly at me.

Nick swallows and his gaze lowers again. His body posture droops a little and he doesn't seem angry anymore, more miserable.

"I need Lia!", Nick's voice suddenly quivers. "I have a tingle in my stomach when I look at her," Nick sobs and looks at me. His eyes are watery and sporadic tears roll down his cheek. "I don't know what I feel anymore. I love Priyanka, otherwise I obviously wouldn't have proposed. But these sudden feelings for Lia..." Nick sobs again.

Watching Nick like this destroys me. The anger, the sadness the pure overwhelm. I feel the same, only I have fewer worries and consequences than he does. Yet this situation overwhelms me. Should I have stopped him? Is it my fault? Was I too much of a presence? An uncomfortable panic comes over me. At first it is quiet sobbing and gasping for breath, but this changes step by step into panicked breathing and loud crying. Once again I am overcome by a panic attack. Sophie, Joe and Nick look at me worriedly. "This is all your fault!" Joe casts a nasty look towards Nick and puts an arm around me protectively. Nick shakes his head silently and throws an angry look at Joe. Sophie looks back and forth between us all and suddenly shouts, "Stop! Joe, we have to stay out of this. No one saw what happened. Not you, no one is in danger. So you don't have to worry. The situation is none of our business. They're gonna have to work this out between themselves. And I know Joe, you don't agree with me, but please let us leave them alone." Sophie reaches for Joe's hand and slowly pulls him off the bed. "Maybe you're right." Joe looks to me again, gives me a kiss on the forehead and smiles encouragingly at me. "If there is anything, you know where to find us," Sophie smiles encouragingly and slowly pulls Joe towards the door.