TommyInnit's unbeatable method of avoiding sudden death

Orthodontist Hate Club UwU

The demon, the absolute bitch, brings up a mask, "This will make you feel a little bit drowsy, but don't worry, it's completely safe and you'll be fine. You're just going to have a short nap."

Tommy screams in terror, "Stay away from me, you- you heathen!"

The mask is placed above his mouth before he can protest and the world starts to blur.

"You're..." He mumbles, mind stuttering, "You're... all... dicks."

_______

Tommy has no idea where he is.

There's this fucking weird lady that's speaking to Philza Minecraft. Holy shit. That's Philza Minecraft.

"Philza Minecraft," He whispers reverently, blinking his eyes out slowly.

"His braces- they were- how long has he had them in?" The weird lady hisses, "They had like, rusted, and there was bit of metal just permanently sticking out. How was he not in pain?"

Philza Minecraft sighs before shrugging, "Knowing him, he's probably survived on pure spite alone. I'll just take him home."

"Yes, yes that's fine. I think he's still a bit out of it. The anesthesia seems to have affected him more than I anticipated. Keep a good eye on him. He's not allowed any food for the first four hours and will probably experience pain or sensitive teeth for the next two days, so keep him on soft foods," She tells the only man ever.

Philza Minecraft nods, "Thank you," Before turning to Tommy, "Alright mate, let's go home."

What the fuck.

Tommy's eyes widen, "I live with you? I live with Philza Minecraft?"

The man raises an eyebrow before snorting, "Yes, Toms."

Oh my fucking Philza.

This is the best day ever.

Tears spring to Tommy's eyes, "Rea- really?"

Philza Minecraft looks a bit constipated or something. Tommy's not sure. "Yes, mate, why are you crying?"

"This is the best day ever," Tommy whispers.

The hero huffs, reaching over to ruffle his head lightly before grabbing Tommy's by the arms gently, pulling upwards. Tommy stands on unstable legs, knees trembling.

"Can you walk?" Philza Minecraft asks and he's so considerate, he really is the only man ever.

"Yes," Tommy decides, determined.

He takes a step forward and his leg decides to betray him, folding beneath him.

He's gripped by waist and lifted into a pair of arms. Philza Minecraft looks down at him, arms tightening around him.

"Yeah, you can't," The hero tells him, amusement evident in his voice as jostles the boy slightly into a more comfortable position.

Philza Minecraft is carrying him.

Tommy is exceeding the usual levels of pog.

He reaches behind and grabs a handful of the man's feathers, eyes wide as marvels at the softness.

"Wings," He murmurs.

Philza Minecraft laughs, "Yes, wings, Toms."

"Can I have them?"