Contract BxM

I forgot to add a trigger warning to this chapter.

❕Sensitive words, verbal abuse and talk of suicide❕

  ' I like you'. Those words had been at the back of his mind. Xavier just had to say it, not that he didn't know for months now but Xavier saying it just made it real and unavoidable. That moment had been his clue to leave, to make it clear that he wasn't planning on being attached but he hesitate and stayed why.

He always left when he felt and began to notice his bed partners starts feeling attached. That's why he hardly slept with a sex partner twice to prevent something of the sort from happening and the drama that came with it but he seemed to have thrown that rule too to the side when it came to Xavier.

Xavier, he was smart and he thought he had him figured out only for Xavier to do things that catches him off guide and that intrigues him.

He notices every little thing, nothing gets past him. That's a skill he learned from a very young age to survive, something he learned from his Dad. So he did notice the lil things Xavier do, like making jokes just to get a laugh out of him, it had annoyed him before because he knew Xavier liked him and it bothered him recently he laughs freely at his jokes. Surprisingly it came easy to him when he didn't give it much thought and that felt good it's being long he allowed himself to do that with someone that isn't Sam.

When Xavier remembered his favorite dessert and went as far to make it for him he felt touched, he didn't remember telling him about that so Xavier must be watching him or Sam told him, God have they being talking to each other.

Then Xavier had wanted them to end things and he panicked. Why he did, he didn't understand, it's not like he had any feelings for him. He's just addicted to the way Xavier fucks him and the feeling he gets after which is more than just the satisfaction he gets when he's with others, he didn't feel that gloomy feeling of shame and disgust which comes afterwards. He felt whole, cherished, sated and calm. Maybe that's why he panicked he didn't want to give that feeling up even if it meant breaking his rules this one time again.

So he's being using Xavier for the sex just like Xavier is using him too. Sex is a big part of his life prolly why he's warming up to Xavier and feels weird around him. He never really believed Xavier likes him like he said, more than what he could offer in bed and he's good at it. He only sees it as Xavier being attracted to his looks and experience but the other day is beginning to make him think different.

Except Sam nobody has really cared about his state of health or be bothered about it. He picks them, fuck hard then go your way no questions asked. Even when he bleeds some bother to ask the usual question of  'are you ok' not like they care but for the sake of it while most don't bother and he preferred it that way, no questions asked. Not like he would ever stay long after the deed is done, he always left afterwards pain or no pain, he didn't need their insincere words nor pity.

He'd learned to take care of himself after it's happened plenty couple of times. Gil always fucked him till he bled, Gil was a sadist and he loved to see the blood knowing that he's in pain turns him on the more. He always tried to not show it and give him the satisfaction. His sadistic laugh and taunts begins to crowd his mind. Most times he ended up with tear and so swollen he had to be taken to the hospital. Well now he knew drugs to take and cream to put down there to help with the pain and swell.

With Xavier it was a whole new different story, Xavier had washed him and was emotional about it. He hadn't expected him to confess and apologize for his words for calling him a whore and a slut and for roughly manhandling him, he'd felt his sincerity and was almost sure Xavier would have cried too.