Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen Self-Insert

College Rounds

"Sharsky, Fassbinder, where we at?," Leo asks the two guys eyeing the computer monitors.

"Server's almost online, Leo."

"Network's up and running."

"Beautiful, that's what I like to hear," Leo comments.

"That's Sharsky, that's Fassbinder, my IT gurus," Leo said, pointing to the guy on his left then to the guy on his right, "Welcome to my empire, bro, TheRealEffingDeal.com. That's me, I'm sure you've heard of it" I rolled my eyes a bit, it's real alright, real dumb I must say.

"Nope/No, I haven't," both me and Sam say.

"Well, that sucks," comments Sharsky.

"What is all this for?," Sam asks. Heh, hacking into the cameras the government doesn't want you to see, JK. Like seriously who's stupid enough to do that.

"See where I'm going, bro. Look, call me gross," Leo starts.

"You're gross," I say without hesitation. All eyes are on me, as I just stare down Leo. Like come on, I hate the weird stalker like photos of girls all over the place. Like does he have nothing better to do.

Leo coughs, and then continues, "well, I want to be a baby billionaire." He holds up kitten calendars. Well, you're past the baby part, or at least I hope you are, but really a billionaire, why?

"Kitten calendars. That's where I started. Look at me now. Got to have dreams, bro," Leo says. I sighed, like it's nice to have dreams, but you need to build up on those dreams. Your dreams need to start small and then get bigger as you go on with your life. I notice Fassbinder pulls something up on his computer.

"Leo! We got some brand-new Shanghai vid!," Fassbinder says. Huh, what's that?

"Post it, baby! Go, go, go! FTJ! FTJ!," Leo says, as he turns around to the monitor behind him. Huh, what video are they going crazy about. Both me and Sam lean over Leo's shoulders and watch the screen.

"What's 'FTJ'?," asks Sam.

"'Fuel the Jet'," answers Leo.

"Did you see that? Did you see that?"

"Look at this. Half of Shanghai gets wrecked and China says 'gas leak'," Leo comments. Huh, yeah, just a little suspicious.

"Don't believe the hype, bro," says Leo.

"Just like the alien robots in LA two years ago that everyone covered up."

"Yeah, I saw these robots, and they did this, like, firing thing and they came down and toasted this woman, and she was like...."

Oh, so they know about the Autobots and Decepticons, maybe not that much, but still. Man, I should really not let my mind wonder, cause I keep predicting things without meaning to.

"It looks fake to me," says Sam. I sigh, Sam, I understand you want to try and cover for the bots, but it's kind of hard to do so when there is so much evidence proving they are real.

"Dude, it's not fake," says Fassbinder, "the internet is pure truth. Video doesn't lie." Okay, now that was a stretch. And who boy, how long have you been on there? I start to block out the back and forth. I sigh, once again.

"Don't be sucking the sack, bro!," I hear Leo say.

"Which sack?," Sam asks.

"What the fuck?," I say looking at them confused.

"The ball sack," Sharsky answers.

"Okay, what the fuck kind of bullshit are you four talking about?," I ask once more, walking towards Sam to stand back at his side.