Miss you even when I'm with you

Everybody was staring at Leedo, who was now sitting on Seoho's bed, quiet. Sometimes, one of the members would quickly glance at Geonhak, just to check for the millionth time that there were two of them.

It was Youngjo who spoke first. He simply sighed, and said, "This is messed up."

"I know, I'm sorry," Leedo repeated yet another time. "I know I should've told you guys about my brother from the start. It was stupid. And selfish."

Leedo and Geonhak exchanged a sad look. Leedo hoped his twin knew how much he resented himself now. He could see Geonhak's red cheek where Seoho had hit him. He could see the traces of Dongju's tears on his face. And he could almost hear Hwanwoong's broken heart beat again.

Now he knew that if he could, he would have done everything differently.

"And Keonhee knew," Youngjo added pensively. "Why him?"

"Accident," Geonhak shrugged. His tears had dried on their own along his cheeks.

"And you didn't say anything?" Youngjo asked Keonhee, who had now resumed his big smile.

"I mean, I didn't owe the truth to anyone. It was Leedo-hyung and Geonhak-hyung's problem. And honestly, it was too good to have someone new in the dorm without anyone knowing."

Youngjo's head dropped into his hands. "If we had a leader, it would definitely not be you."

Keonhee giggled, and even Hwanwoong smiled a bit, but Seoho was still not done with the whole situation. He grunted angrily towards Leedo, "But why? What was the use of all this shit? What did you gain?"

Leedo gave a shy smile and ruffled in the bag he had brought with him. He got something out of it and handed it towards Dongju, who was still glued to Seoho in the middle of the room.

"If Geonhak-ah hadn't helped, I would've never been able to make this without any of you noticing." Dongju took the square-shaped object with a frown. "Happy birthday, baby."

The young boy finally looked up from the album and tilted his head. "Is it a song? For me?"

"I hope you like it."

Dongju began to smile shyly and inserted the CD in Seoho's stereo. For a few minutes, Leedo's music and his deep rapping voice filled the silent room. Dongju was sitting on his bed, listening with his eyes closed, and the rest of the members were looking fondly at him.

Leedo felt whole again. Everything he had been working for, everything he had sacrificed was finally worth it. He could do anything for Dongju's smile.

Geonhak's high voice was then heard, singing the chorus to the last song. As he kept repeating "Miss you even when I'm with you", again and again, slowlier and slowlier, Leedo caught sight of Hwanwoong, who was gaping at his twin brother.

Next to him, Youngjo was smiling proudly at Leedo as the song was ending. "This is the best gift I've ever had," Dongju said softly.

Leedo grinned and got up, carefully sitting down next to his boyfriend who simply jumped on him to embrace him tightly. Leedo glanced at Seoho, received an almost imperceptible nod of the head, and wrapped his arms around the young crying boy.

"Hyung," Hwanwoong whispered next to Geonhak. Their eyes met. Hwanwoong's were nearly full of tears. "The chorus is so... beautiful. Is that really you singing?"

Geonhak scratched his head and, after checking that everyone was either busy playing again their favourite song or chatting vividly about Leedo and Dongju, he said, "Yeah, it's really me."

Hwanwoong looked away for a moment in Leedo's direction, and stared at Geonhak again. "You're not that identical. I should've known."

"And I should've let you know. I haven't been fair with you one bit. I feel that I owe you an apology the most. I'm so sorry, Woongie. It must've been excruciating, not knowing how I'd react, who you were really talking to. But everything I ever said to you, everything I ever felt for you, that was real."

Hwanwoong checked the others again, and discreetly took the older boy's soft, gentle hand. "I've known you for weeks and yet it feels like it's the first time I truly see you. I've felt so bad to have those stupid feelings for Leedo-hyung, knowing he was in love with Dongju and all. But I just couldn't stop liking him. I felt I couldn't live without him."

Geonhak closed his eyes for a minute. "Please, don't say 'Leedo-hyung'. Say 'Geonhak-hyung'."

The smaller one chuckled and they remained quiet, staring at one another fondly, waiting for the moment when they would really be alone, when it would be just them two together, really them two.

Dongju was still very emotional, and wriggling between Leedo's arms, overexcited. He kissed his boyfriend's cheek and exclaimed enthusiastically, "I'm going to call Dongmyeong-ah! He needs to come over and listen to this!"

Youngjo sighed very slowly and said, "When I thought I'd had enough twins for one day, there's more coming out the door."