Random Stuff

Angel: Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, that's fucked up. Like c'mon, you know I'm dumb as hell!

Husker: Plants are basically the ideal friends. They are quiet, friendly, and easy to please. All they need is a little water and fresh earth, and they are perfectly happy to lie there all day in the sun. And they don't make increasingly awful life choices, or hide their relationships. They have never, as far as I know, fucked a bee.

Alastor: It's not ugly, just aesthetically challenged.

Angel: Is this gaslighting? Am I being gaslit?
Husker: If I were gaslighting you, you'd never know it.
Angel: Is THAT gaslighting?
Husker: Shut the fuck up.

Alastor: Italics.
Angel: Yeah, Italians.

Angel: See, the problem is, Husker, you're playing 3D chess. I'm playing 4D.
Husker: I'm playing checkers. I don't know what the fuck you're playing.

Angel: I'm feeling it! What am I feeling? Death, probably.

Vaggie: What are y'all's favorite things to wake up to?
Charlie: Breakfast in bed!
Angel: Emails from AO3!
Alastor: My favorite thing to wake up to is not waking up at all.
Alastor: The screams of my enemies are a close second though.

Alastor: What makes a bigger memory than a passionate kiss?
Alastor: A stab wound.

Angel, T-posing in the doorway: Greetings, Husker.
Husker, not looking up from their coffee: Good morning, problem child.

Angel: Surgery is basically just stabbing someone to life.
Husker: Please never become a surgeon.

Alastor, jumping out of Vaggie's closet: BOO!
Charlie:
Alastor :
Charlie:
Alastor : *makes a sad face*
Charlie: Ahh! Oh my god! You scared me!

Angel: That was so hot, Husky.
Husker: I called the person who just flirted with you a degenerate dog and told them I hope they get dragged through the streets.
Angel: I'm so in love with you.

Husker: So you like cats?
Angel: Yeah.
Husker: *tries to impress them by slowly pushing a glass off the table*

Angel: When you said 'Magic in Bed', I wasn't expecting this...
Husker: *pulls out a card from the deck* Now, was this your card?
Angel: Holy moly-

Angel: We have a problem.
Husker: No, YOU have a problem. I have an idiot who keeps making them.

Husker: I love you.
Angel, not paying attention: What was that?
Husker: I said I'm selling you to the zOo-

Husker: Two brooooos!
Angel: Chillin' in a hot tub!
Husker: Five feet apart 'cause we're not gay!
Angel:
Husker:
Angel: *tearing up*
Husker: Babe, c'mon...
Angel: AND HERE YOU REALLY HAD ME THINKING WE HAD SOMETHING.
Husker: Babe...

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And that is all I have! I hope you enjoy!